Silence
by IrishGal4Twilight
Summary: Bella was forced to leave Forks 10 years ago with her mother. Now, unfortunate events have forced her to come back. Unable to trust herself enough to talk and determined to fade into the background, can old friends discover the truth about why she left?AH
1. Prologue

**A/N: I thought of this idea while I was on holidays. For those of you who have read my other stories, this one is completely different. First off, it's AH and it's a little bit darker than my other stories. Anyway I'm trying out the prologue and first chapter to see how they are received.**

**Bella Swan**

The one thing I have known for most of my life is that no matter what, no-one can understand you.

Your feelings, your thoughts, your past, none of that can be understood by anyone else.

'It's ok, just tell me what happened in your own words. You don't have to be like this for much longer if you tell me what's wrong.'

Sitting before the woman officer whose smile radiates 'tell me or die' as she says everything is ok cements my theory.

Because everything is not ok.

Nothing has been ok in my life for ten years and what happened yesterday has officially pushed me over the edge.

The voice echoes in my mind from before the incident.

_You tell anyone and you're next_.

It's not the threat that forces me to not utter a word, it's the fact that I had been standing there and did not do a thing to stop it.

I am useless, a burden, an ongoing problem that other people have to deal with. And because I am too chicken to fix the problem permanently, I have decided to do the only thing that I can do: fade into the background.

It has worked for the past twenty-four hours and is getting progressively easier.

'Now sweetheart, nothing to be afraid of. You're safe now. Just tell me your father's phone number so as we can call him and inform him of what has happened.'

Thankfully she has come to the conclusion that I will not talk and slid a pen and some paper over the desk towards me

I picked up the pen only to drop it immediately and push the chair away from the desk.

The cool metal of the pen conjured the image of cold metal clenched in his fist, the glint shining on the already blood-stained floor…

**A/N: I know it's short but the next one's longer. Tell me what you think of it.**


	2. Facing Facts

**A/N: Here's the first chapter, don't forget to review and tell me if I should continue.**

**Bella Swan**

Almost six weeks have past since the day in the police station. Within a week of the call I was back in Forks, the first time since I had been forced to leave it ten years ago.

My dad was distraught by what had happened. He seemed to understand straight away what I was doing and mostly asked me questions that involved gestures, the odd time that he wanted a descriptive answer he would hand me a notepad and pencil.

I was forced to see a counsellor about what had happened but it didn't seem to go very well. Charlie was told the results of the session and he joked later that even someone like him could have figured out I didn't want to talk without paying two hundred dollars.

Living with him was strange at first considering I have barely spent more than a week with him since I was seven and that was either camping or in a hotel somewhere.

I figured before we left that maybe being in different surroundings that did not contain bad memories would be helpful to making me more invisible. I certainly was having less panic attacks.

I was beginning to grow more perceptive of things around me. In a way it was a good thing, I could understand my dad's emotions better without asking him a thing.

In other ways, it was bad. I could see things that brought flashbacks everywhere. I couldn't go into the front room. I couldn't stare at certain things for too long. I freaked out when I heard certain words on the television.

I basically could not listen or watch the news or most things on television. I never was one for electronic entertainment unless it was my iPod but it was a problem to me that Charlie muted the television whenever I came downstairs.

I was growing anxious at the ever looming prospect of school tomorrow.

Not only was it going to be hard for me to get around without talking but I had never been social back in Phoenix. Friendships and relationships with other people in general were a mystery to me. I hadn't had friends since I left Forks.

What also bothered me was that because Forks was so small, there was a large possibility that people in my class might recognise me from before. It would be hard to explain why I am so different compared to the little girl who seemed so bright and sweet.

Hopefully my appearance has changed drastically since then.

I stared at my pale self in the bathroom mirror, almost disgusted by my own appearance.

My figure was thin, not bony, with curves that seemed out of place. I definitely was not athletic by my total lack of muscles. My hair was a dull brown, cut bluntly and quite thick. My eyes were the same brown; dull, flat, and boring. I avoided looking at my face.

After finding several hundred things to hate about my body, I decided to get some sleep so as I wouldn't be tired tomorrow.

I lay in bed for some time debating whether I could get to sleep without pills tonight. I sighed and reached for the bottle beside me, taking one out and swallowing it with the always ready glass of water. I listened to the patter of rain on the roof as I waited for the sleeping pill to kick in, the soft sound adding to the pull of unconsciousness. My eyes welled up again, the tears flowing down my cheeks for no reason… It felt as if my body was displaying emotion while inside I was numb.

--

I woke the next morning at six, the same time that I have woken up at for six years. I dressed quickly and checked I had everything in my bag. Forgetting something would just add to my list of problems today.

Charlie had left earlier for work and had entrusted me with his ancient truck that his father had bought.

I grabbed a sandwich and apple from the kitchen before getting the keys to the truck. I knew that getting cafeteria food would involve awkward situations and also having food ready would mean I could eat by myself.

Pulling on my jacket I couldn't help but compare my current mood to the rain outside the door. Dark and dismal.

Arriving at the school took less time than I anticipated and I was glad of that. Getting there early meant less people to deal with and more time to find my way around.

I pulled the truck into a spot close to the office and cluster of buildings and got out, heading towards the red-brick building in front of me.

I had recently discovered that keeping my mind occupied helps stop flashbacks or panic attacks. As I walked into the office I was running through poems that I had read a few weeks ago.

The interior of the office was annoyingly generic. Pale green walls were covered up with brightly coloured posters and flyers which advertised everything from a local café asking for staff to a winter formal that took place three years ago. The large counter that cut the room in half was also covered in flyers. There was a plump middle-aged woman with frizzy red hair sitting behind the counter. She looked up from her computer as I walked in.

'Hello, can I help you with anything?'

I walked up to the counter and took out my notepad with some ready-made notes on it.

_I'm Bella Swan_

I showed her the piece of paper and she smiled, typing something into the ancient machine that posed as a computer.

When she frowned I knew something was wrong.

She turned back to me with a smile back on her face and handed me a few sheets of paper and an envelope.

'Now here's your schedule and a map of the school. Here you have to get all of your teachers to sign and bring back at the end of the day. Now I want you to hand this envelope to your first teacher and then they will give you something for your next teacher and so on. Nothing to worry about, just something for new students.'

Her smile was fake and forced; of course there had to be something to worry about. Why couldn't she just send me off with my schedule and map and let me be?

I left the office and started towards the cluster of buildings that contained classrooms and the gym. The cafeteria was at the back of the office.

The parking lot was beginning to fill up slowly. I was grateful for the rain which gave me a chance to cover up my face. My black jacket blended in with everyone else.

I followed a group of people to my first class, standing a few feet behind them. I picked up on some of their conversation but didn't eavesdrop too much.

'…Mike are you going to the beach when the weather's good?…'

'…No idea. I have to get the assignment off my Trig teacher before I even think about starting that…'

'…But she can't be dating him. He's meant to be dating her…'

I noticed that the gossip one had blond hair and an annoying nasal voice. She was a clone of the girls who hated me back in Phoenix.

The room thankfully was dry and warm. I hung my jacket up with everyone else's beside the door and darted up to the teacher's desk.

My English teacher was… grey. His hair and skin seemed to fade into one another. His height was neither tall nor short. Even his clothes failed to bring out any colour in his face.

He stared at me when I approached him and took the sheet of paper and envelope. He signed the sheet but ignored the envelope.

'You have a name?'

I pulled out my notepad again. He examined it.

'You have a problem speaking then.'

I pointed at the envelope for him to open. When he read the contents, he glared at me.

'I do not believe in giving special treatment to any of my students. You will be treated the same as anyone else here. You can't deal with that then you change classes.'

He wrote something and stuck it back into the envelope, sealing it with tape before shoving it back to me.

'There's an empty seat beside Mike.'

I walked slowly back to where 'Mike' sat. I sank into the desk beside him and began to copy out some of the notes about work we will be doing from the board. I could feel the stares of people on my back but I ignored them and continued to write.

'Hey I'm Mike Newton. You're new here right?'

Way to point out the obvious.

'So what's your name?'

I felt like pulling out the piece of paper and permanently sticking it to my forehead. I sighed and showed him the note that I would have to keep with me at all times.

'Bella Swan… You know I swear I remember you from somewhere.'

Of course you remember me. Charlie was your dad's best man at his wedding. Your parents own the sports equipment store that Charlie buys all his fishing gear from. We had to be forced to play together at parties when we were six.

'Settle down everyone. We have a new student with us today. Bella Swan.'

Grey pointed down to my seat and twenty pairs of eyes focused on me. Fading into the background was going to be harder than I anticipated. Mike smiled at me.

'Hey Bella I think you should say hi'

And I anticipate that Mike Newton will be next on my Most Hated list.

--

First and second period passed without too much hassle. The teacher for my Trig class seemed nice enough. He didn't make a huge fuss when I walked in. I still had no idea what was in the envelope though, every time I got it back it was sealed in some way.

Third period was Biology, my only favourite subject. I had good grades in nearly everything back in my old school because having no social life meant that all my time was focused on school work. Hopefully things will be the same here.

The classroom was full when I came in. The teacher waved at me when he seen me at the door.

'Bella Swan, is it?'

I handed him the paper and envelope silently once more, a little apprehensive that he knew who I was. He chuckled at my expression.

'No need to look so worried. I know your father, he always talks about you. It's not hard to recognise you when you look so much like him.'

He opened the envelope and froze. His eyes looked at me in horror.

'This can't be true…'

He shook his head and wrote something anyway, hastily sealing the envelope.

'Now… ah, yes. There's a seat over there.'

I took the envelope and walked over to an empty desk, taking the seat near the aisle.

Mr Molina started to explain today's lesson as I took out my books.

'…and next week we will- Nice of you to join us Edward.'

I ignored the person who just walked in and focused my attention on Mr Molina. The chair beside me was pulled and whoever just walked in sat in it.

The person shuffled about for a minute, taking out books. I noticed that he was pale, paler than me, from his hands.

'…and now I need someone to help me with this sample lab…Mr Cullen you seem to be more interested in the person beside you today so you have the honour of helping me.'

I stopped writing and clenched my pen tightly.

It can't be the same Edward Cullen.

The person walked away from the desk. The unmistakable bronze hair bringing back memories of countless days from when I was younger.

He turned around and locked eyes with me. His green eyes still exactly the same since I last seen them ten years ago. There was some confusion and curiosity in them, as if he didn't recognise me. That was a good sign right?

Edward helped Mr Molina set up the lab but his gaze never left me. I concentrated on taking notes about the lab, gratefully running from the room when the bell signalled lunch.

I reached my locker before most people were out of their rooms and got my books.

'Hey Bella! Wait up!'

I groaned internally and looked over my shoulder, seeing Edward running towards me. His face looked brighter than before, as if he had received good news. He stopped in in front of me and smiled. His smile was always crooked, even when he was small, but now the familiar smile appeared different to me because of the now-grown up face it was on.

'I can't believe it's you! I thought Mr Molina made a mistake when he said Bella Swan. It's been ten years, I could barely recognise you.'

I attempted to smile, but it was more of a grimace, my facial muscles hadn't been used for more than six weeks.

I dropped my gaze and shuffled uncomfortably. I was feeling extremely awkward and I was sure he could feel it.

'Do you want to sit with us for lunch? There's only Alice and her boyfriend Jasper, and Emmett with his girlfriend Rosalie. I'm sure they'll be glad to see you.'

I shook my head again, wishing the rising emotions in my body to calm down. Edward had always been my best friend when we were younger. Before the divorce I would always tell him how I felt and what was going on. I still couldn't believe he was still the same.

Whenever Charlie was being nice to me, I could walk away when I couldn't bear it any longer. Now I couldn't get away as easily and if I did run, Edward would come after me. My body began to shake and I had a sudden urge to talk to him. I could never trust myself if I did give in. I suppressed the words threatening to spill but instead my eyes filled up. I didn't even know what triggered my attacks or sudden bursts of emotion, they just happened.

'You left this behind you when you ran out. It seemed important so I brought it with me,' he handed over the envelope. The tape was still stuck on awkwardly, but at a different angle to where Mr Molina put it on.

I nodded and shoved it into my bag.

'Are you ok? You seem a little sick.'

I bit my lip and decided that Edward did not expect me to talk. I pulled out my notepad and began to write.

_I'm fine. Just adjusting to a new school. Thanks for bringing me the envelope. I don't think I will eat lunch with you guys today, I might go and see the nurse._

I showed Edward the note but before I could put my pen away he grabbed it.

_Ok but if you don't eat with us today, you have to make up for it sometime soon. Alice won't let you get away without eating with us. Hopefully I'll see you later._

He smiled at me again and walked over to the cafeteria. I waited for him to disappear before walking out to the unused benches at the other side of the lockers. I sat down on one and pulled out the envelope. The tape was definitely pulled off after Mr Molina sealed it. I wondered if Edward had read it. Without much hesitation, I carefully peeled the tape away. Inside the envelope was a letter from the therapist I had seen and another sheet which had notes from my teachers. I read through the notes first, glancing over my teachers comments.

…_will treat her as normal…_

…_unfortunate events to happen to someone so young…_

…_have known her father for some time and have never imagined something like this to happen to her…_

I put the sheet back into the envelope and started to read the letter.

…_As you have heard… because of these unfortunate events, large psychological damage… may not trust male contact… will not speak…_

My tears were already flowing.I was being described like I wasn't even a person. They could have put 'it' instead of 'she' and called me a new species.

I sealed the envelope and put it into my bag as I headed to the toilets to clean up. I tried to wash and dry my face without looking in the mirror but it was nearly impossible to know how bad I looked if I didn't see myself.

I took a deep breath and looked up.

The person before me could not be me.

They looked awful. Gaunt, paler than normal, lifeless.

My eyes welled up once again when I seen something else in the face.

The person looked undeniably depressed and scared.

**A/N: Tell me what you think. It should get better as it goes along.**


	3. Gym Class

**A/N: 11 reviews so far. I think I will keep on going with the story because I have writer's block for my other one. One thing you have to note though is that I will not be explaining the 'incident' in full until Bella tells Edward, you will get references and flashbacks but not the whole story. Have fun creating theories on what happened!**

**I have decided to put the date on every chapter so it is easier to follow. The last chapter was September 2nd (Bella's first day at Forks High), the incident happened on July 22nd, and this chapter continues on from the last one.**

**Sept 2nd Part 2**

**Bella Swan**

I sat in the toilets long after the bell had rang.

Every few minutes I looked at myself, willing for my appearance to change or alter slightly to make me look normal again. I had a sinking feeling that I had looked like this for a long time, before the incident even. That scared me a little because inside I felt ok, numb, but normal enough.

Two hours after lunch had ended, the door opened. I was locked in a stall but I still tucked my feet under me and hugged my bag to my chest. The person walked about for a bit before calling out.

'Bella? Are you in here?'

I couldn't recognise the voice. A pair of feet clad in designer flats appeared below the stall door.

'Bella, it's me, Alice Cullen. Edward asked me to come and find you, the teachers have been wondering where you had gone to and the nurse excuse only works for one period,' she was speaking in a friendly tone and I could remember her as the bubbly, energetic pixie that enjoyed spending more money than a seven year old should on accessories.

'Bella, just open the stall door and let me in. I swear not to take you by force.'

I recalled the memory of a three foot Alice throwing a five foot Emmett to the floor, over who had control of the remote control. Smiling slightly at the pleasant memory, I reached over and hesitantly unlocked the door.

There stood the now barely five foot tall Alice, with the same black spiky hair.

'Hey,' she said as she walked in, 'We have three options but you would only like two.'

She slid down gracefully and wrapped her arms around her knees.

'Option one is we go and see the nurse, making up some excuse to get you home. Option two is I go back to Ms Vane and tell her you're sick and want another ten minutes in the toilet. Personally I think the first one is best because you look really pale but if you want to go back to class, then the second one will work,' she chattered on endlessly leaving no room for my silent answer.

'Which do you think?'

She looked at me expectantly and waited for me to pull out the notepad. I wrote a great big '1' on the page and her eyes lit up. From what I could barely remember, this was not a good thing.

'Ok,' the bell rang as she spoke, 'crap! You have Clapp now, this is going to be harder than expected… Hold on just one minute.'

She got up and ran to the door of the toilets. Once she had gone I closed and locked the stall again.

'…Just two seconds, that will be all it will take.'

'But Alice, it's the_ girls_ bathroom.'

'So? It's also Bella.'

'Fine, but you owe me.'

The door opened and two people walked in. Alice stood in front of the stall again.

'Bella, you can come out now, we have to work this out.'

I reluctantly stood and opened the door. Alice pulled me out of the stall and I froze with the contact. My body started to shudder and I desperately tried to keep all sound from escaping my lips. I backed away from Alice and ended up banging into the wall. The image of a fist raised in front of me flashed though my mind.

'Bella, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to scare you,' she looked like she was about to cry.

I took a couple of deep breaths and the shaking slowed. I had a strong feeling it would be a while before it stopped completely.

My eyes wandered from Alice to the person standing behind her. Edward looked at me with extreme concern, as if I was about to die. He smiled slightly when I looked at him.

'I know, I can't believe I'm in the girls bathroom either,' he said jokingly.

Alice assumed her controlling stance again and spun around to face Edward.

'You're in music now, aren't you?'

He looked at her cautiously before nodding.

'So you're beside the gym for this period.'

He nodded again.

'And you were in Bella's last two classes.'

He nodded, opening his mouth to speak but closed it quickly.

'So, if Bella was sick then she would have told you. You would have seen her exit this bathroom and go to the gym, fainting along the way. You would run to her, bring her to the nurse and get her brought home, correct?

We all knew where this was going. Edward nodded and spoke up before Alice took a breath.

'Are you ok with this Bella?'

I started nodding but ended up shaking my head. My shuddering had almost stopped, going home now would only draw more unwanted attention to me. If I went home then Charlie would wonder if I was really sick, and then tomorrow everyone would be asking if I was alright.

'So you want to go back to class?'

I nodded. Alice smiled and danced out the door.

'Um, Alice? How are you going to explain being ten minutes late to class?'

She turned around and placed her hands on her hips.

'I have Jefferson now. You know how big a soft touch he is.'

'Yes but ten minutes is a lot considering how many late's you got last year.'

She smiled again.

'Let's just say it will be easy to create an excuse.'

Edward looked at her for an answer.

'He gets embarrassed when you mention the term 'girl troubles'. I have a feeling I'll get most of the class off to go to the nurse.'

She skipped out the door leaving me with a very disgusted Edward.

'That's just… nasty. The poor guy was tortured by her last year and now this?'

He grabbed my bag from it's place in the stall and opened the door for me. We walked out of the dry toilets and into the damp mist that had descended on the school.

I took out the notepad and quickly scribbled a note onto it.

_How are we going to explain being so late?_

He smirked and took the pen from me.

_Easy, Coach Clapp loves us Cullens. Emmett is the star football player, Alice was head cheerleader before she realised how much shopping time practice took up and I used to be good at track. I'll just tell him you felt sick and ran into the bathroom and I waited to see if you were ok. My music teacher is cool and won't mind me being late._

He finished writing his note quicker than the time it took for me to write mine. I was amazed at his perfect penmanship.

We arrived at the gym and he led me in. I kept good two feet between us at all times and I was very aware that after what had happened with Alice, having 'male contact' might be worse. Maybe the psychiatrist was right…

'Ah, now who do we have here?'

Coach Clapp was another middle-aged male teacher, who seemed a little overweight to be a gym teacher. He eyed both me and Edward up as we walked towards him.

'Mr Cullen, I don't recall you being in this class.'

Edward placed my bag beside me on the ground and shook his head.

'No, I'm meant to be in music now, but Bella,' he pointed at me and gave Coach Clapp the envelope and paper, 'was feeling sick all day so when she ran into the bathroom earlier, I waited to see if she was alright.'

Coach nodded and wrote a note quickly on the paper in the envelope. He signed the sheet and handed both back to me.

'Well Edward, you should get back to class. Ms Swan, you can sit down with the rest of the class. If you still feel sick next gym lesson just bring a note excusing yourself and I have no problem letting you sit out.'

He said everything to me as if I was some incompetent four year old. I nodded and walked over to the bleachers lining one of the gym's walls. I sat as far away from the rest of my class as I could.

'Hey Bella!'

I cringed at that voice. Mike jumped out of his seat and ran down to where I was sitting.

'Do you want to sit with us, you seem all alone down here.'

I didn't have to look up to see that some of his friends didn't want me to sit with them. I shook my head, begging for him to go away.

'Ok… hey, there's this group thing that we are having soon to kick off the new school year. A bunch of us are going to go down to the beach when the weather's good. You want to come?'

I shook my head. Mike looked like a toddler who had just been denied a treat.

'Oh, ok. Well you can still sit with us if you want.' He reached over and patted my shoulder.

I couldn't help it. I screamed. Pushing myself away from Mike, I fell off the edge of the bleachers and thumped onto the floor. A panic attack threatened to break through my carefully placed boundaries as memories pounded through my head.

… '_I don't care if you can't do it, at least make a somewhat decent attempt, you useless piece of crap.'_

_I backed away from the raised hand and ended up knocking down the pot of sauce on the burner. Ignoring the burns searing through my shoulder, I kept backing away from him, keeping a close eye on the fist that was ready to come crashing down on me._

'_What's going on in here?'_

_He turned around and faced the new arrival. His anger was still raging as he pushed her out of the door._

'_We have to talk,' he growled…_

My chest heaved as I pulled myself back into the present.

'No…no no…no,' was all I whimpered as I pushed myself aimlessly against the wall behind me.

'Everybody back into your seats,' the Coach's voice boomed throughout the gym, 'Bella? Can you hear me?'

Whispers started growing but I couldn't decipher what was being said. Some people started to shout out things like 'call 911' or 'someone get the nurse'. Coach Clapp turned around.

'Mike sit down! Everyone stay quiet. Now I want you all to go outside onto the field and sit quietly until I come out. Eric, you're in charge of keeping them under control.'

I heard the sounds of everyone leaving the gym but my eyes wouldn't break from Mike until he had gone. As soon as the door closed, I slumped in exhaustion. Coach Clapp kept a good distance between us and looked at me nervously. He waited until my breathing was nearly back to normal before talking to me.

'Do you want me to get the nurse?'

I shook my head wanting everything to get back to normal. He smiled at me.

'The bell will go in a few minutes. Do you want to wait here until the end of the day or do you want me to get someone to bring you home?'

I held up a finger for the first option and he stood, walking silently outside. I let my eyes flow freely as I curled up on the floor. My body was still shaking and there was no doubt that I was in no condition to walk, let alone drive home.

The door slammed open and I sat up, whimpering uselessly.

'Bella?'

Edward's voice called though the gym until he seem me lying on the ground. He ran over to me but slowed down until he was about a foot away from me. He sat down and I noticed how distraught he looked.

'We were let out early from music and I seen everyone from this class on the field. Mike told me what happened,' his voice grew into a snarl as he said Mike's name, 'you seemed to certainly scare him. He just kept on apologising to me for no reason.'

He looked at me softly and I was surprised by how much pain was in eyes.

'Are you ok?' he whispered.

I debated lying but something told me that was a bad idea. I shook my head and broke down into sobs. He laid his hand on the floor and my hand inched out to it.

When they touched, there was no pain, no flashbacks, nothing. Edward smiled at me and pulled out a packet of tissues which I gratefully accepted. He sat there, holding my hand, until I stopped crying.

I wiped my face one last time and looked out the windows near the ceiling. It had grown considerably darker since I had last looked out. I checked the time on my watch and was embarrassed that I had kept Edward here for over two hours. He noticed me looking embarrassed.

'It's ok.'

He stood and helped me up, not breaking our contact. I went to grab my bag only to realise Edward had it. He gently pulled me out of the gym and into the parking lot. There were only two cars left, my truck and a Volvo. I started towards my truck only to be pulled away. Edward chuckled.

'There is no way I am letting you drive home, firstly you are in no fit state to drive alone and secondly it's dark and the roads here are dangerous enough even when you know them well.'

I allowed him to walk me over to his car and help me in, my knees were still stiff from being curled up for so long and my legs were weak. I wondered where Alice and Emmett were, didn't they get a ride with Edward because they live together?

'Everyone rode home with Rosalie, they get a bit impatient when left for more than two minutes, hence the reason I have my own car. It's a bit frustrating when your left at school because your lesson ran five minutes late.'

He smiled again at me and I smiled back. His eyes sparkled a bit when I smiled. I looked at him questionably. He shrugged.

'That's the first time I've seen you smile properly all day.'

We were halfway to my house and I was surprised he knew the way after all these years. A beeping noise starting coming from speakers in the dashboard. The display above the radio read 'Incoming Call: Dad' He pressed a button.

'Hello?'

'Edward, are you on your way home?'

The unmistakable voice of Carlisle Cullen filled the car.

'Yes, Bella was just feeling unwell so I stayed with her.'

Carlisle laughed nervously.

'Hello Bella. That's good, I'm after having Charlie ringing the hospital asking where she was. Alice came home and told Esme you two had met Bella earlier today. I figured that the two of you must be together because you both hadn't arrived home yet. I'll just call him back to let him know you're on your way.'

'Ok, thanks. See you later.'

'Bye.'

Edward pressed another button and the call disconnected. I hung my head in my hands. Great, now Charlie was worried about me.

The ride was silent until Edward stopped in front of my house. I shuffled uncomfortably in my seat, feeling his gaze on me, knowing that he wanted to talk to me before I went inside.

'Bella. I heard Mike saying earlier that…' I looked up when he paused and seem some form of hope in his eyes behind the amount of pain that had almost disappeared from earlier. He took a deep breath and continued.

'I heard Mike saying that you talked earlier in gym.' He continued to hold my gaze, searching for something that he couldn't find.

'It's just that, and I know I had no right to do it and I apologise, when I read the letter it said that you would not trust male contact and that you would not talk.'

He paused again and was searching in my eyes once more.

'It seemed earlier that it was ok for you to hold my hand but when Mike touched you, you freaked out and started to mumble 'no'.'

I stared at him, communicating that he should get to the point.

'I understand that something happened, but why do you not trust yourself to talk.'

His words were deliberately spoken to get a reaction and my hand flew to my mouth as soon as he got it.

'Because of will happen to me if I do.'

He sat staring at me and I noticed his eyes changing. Victory, sadness and anger all passed through before they returned to normal. I slumped back against the seat and banged my head against the head rest.

Almost seven weeks I had lasted and in the space of a day he had gotten me to speak. I knew that he had done something wrong to get me to talk and that I should distance myself from him. I turned around and grabbed my bag from the backseat and opened the door.

'Bella wait!'

I slammed the door and jogged up the path, only to be stopped by Edward. I pulled against his grip and refused to face him.

'Bella why are you punishing yourself?'

I pulled against him once more but it was no use, he was strong but I was extremely weak so very little strength was needed to keep me still.

'Bella,' his voice was softer, almost a whisper, 'why are you doing this to yourself?'

My sobs were breaking through again and I felt my control slip.

'I…I don't know,' was all I barely mumbled. I felt Edward's hand slip down to mine and I turned to face him. I leaned my face on his shoulder and his armed wrapped around me as my sobs shook through my body. I heard the door open and lit spilled around us but I didn't take much notice of it. Charlie came outside and took my forgotten bag from the ground.

'Take her inside, will you, I don't think I'm able to bring her upstairs,' he told Edward. I felt Edward nod as he pulled me inside. Before I realised it, we were in my room. My sobs had almost stopped so I pulled away from Edward and looked down at the floor.

'I guess I should get going. Are you going to be ok?'

I nodded, my throat still sore from screaming earlier. I sat on the bed once Edward had left and closed my eyes, not yet ready to sleep but not able to face the world once more. I concentrated on listening to the noises outside my window, hoping to gradually fall asleep. Half an hour after Edward had left I heard the truck pull up outside, I smiled to myself knowing that him and Alice had brought it back for tomorrow. As sleep suddenly took over, I couldn't help but wonder if I would speak tomorrow. A part of me said to at least try, I didn't have to say much. But another part told me to keep my mouth shut.

**A/N: Finally she spoke! Don't expect much from Bella soon though, it will take time for her to get back to normal let alone reveal the truth. Now, who wants Edward's POV from the past two chapters? It may only be one chapter long though. And I just want to point something out: 3474 words! That's my longest chapter ever! Sorry had to say that, I am so proud of myself right now for writing longer chapters.**


	4. No Searching

**A/N: Right so the views on Edward's POV are yes but not from the last chapter. This is all from the next morning with some of the previous night thrown in (don't worry, not a lot, just a few references).**

**I'm aiming for 3000 words in this chapter so I'm sorry if it took a while to put up.**

**One thing I definitely have to say is thank you all for the reviews! My email account has been moved and no links are showing up on any emails so replying to you all is nearly impossible.**

**Thanks to:**

**heh-laney **for reviewing on the prologue

**bellestormes, RAWR.cookie., sovoyita **(lol I seen said socks the other day!)**, Fatima-FireandIce, Miss.Megan, hershykisses211, xo-harlequin girl-xo, Horsefreak01** (I'm in the middle of replying to your PM now!)**, **and **bloodredeclipse** for reviewing on chapter 2

**sovoyita, Luvntwilight, bloodredeclipse** (I don't think anyone could have kept their mouth shut either)**, Xx EdwardLova xX**, **OBlossom,** and **stargazer611** for reviewing on chapter 3.

**OnceACullenForeverAVampire (aka Pretty.Odd.): **Michaela, I am in the next room, I can here you going 'ow', there is no need to put 'the magnets are hurting me' in a review.

**There is a bit about Jasper in this but it will be a key factor to the story so don't just skip over it. The song is 'Breaking the Habit' by Linkin Park, I thought it would be good considering what Bella is thinking about.**

**Sept 3****rd**

**Edward Cullen**

Sleeping last night was barely an option. After everything that had happened yesterday, I couldn't sit still, let alone lie down and allow exhaustion to creep through me.

I couldn't believe Bella was back. I had never clicked with anyone outside of my family and even then I wasn't very close to them. Rosalie and Jasper were friendly towards me but we weren't close enough to be friends. It had been ten years since I had lost my best friend and now she was back, although her current state worried me.

Seeing her in Biology was like seeing another person. Granted, she had grown up, but none of her bright and optimistic essence that I clearly remembered as a child was there. Her eyes held more hurt and pain than someone of her age should know. After reading the envelope I felt like punching something. For somebody to have pushed Bella to those extremes was sickening.

After dropping Bella off I decided to do something that I hadn't done before, I called Jasper.

When he was younger his father left his mother to join the army. He was only a toddler when his father left but had seen more abuse than some adults would have. When his father returned from service, Jasper was a teenager. He could remember everything that had happened and would not let it happen again.

After years of fighting, he finally convinced his mother to go the authorities and file for a divorce. Together, they broke away from his father and started to live a somewhat normal life. Jasper was asked to go into therapy with his mother and soon after, she was diagnosed with a strong form of depression. For five years, Jasper was the only one to look after his mother. If anyone would know what would help Bella it was him.

Thankfully Alice gave me his number without question and he answered quickly. I explained everything I had read and everything I had noticed including what had happened when Mike and Alice touched her. He listened intently and came to a conclusion.

'It definitely seems like an abuse case but there is something bigger in there. From what you have said, she seems to have no experience in social situations so she will be uncomfortable with large groups for a while. Also she will be used to being alone so getting her to open up will take a long time. You have to let her trust you before you ask or do anything big. That will take a while because she doesn't seem to trust herself.'

I ran through his answer as I got ready for school. It was five o'clock in the morning and the sun hadn't even risen yet. I sat down at my laptop and decided to do a bit of research myself. Tapping my fingers against my wooden desk, I waited for the search engine to load. Once ready, I began to type.

_Phoenix abuse cases July_

'You shouldn't be doing that, you know.'

I jumped in my seat and turned to glare at Alice who was standing behind me.

'And you shouldn't sneak up behind people,' I spat back, shutting down my laptop.

She shrugged and sat on my bed.

'Your tapping was annoying me because I was woken up by your shower.'

She hopped off the edge of my bed and proceeded to rummage through my things.

'Why shouldn't I do it?' I asked cautiously. My search had been very blunt, nothing to assume it was Bella I was looking for. I quickly created excuses in my head ranging from school assignments to medical research for college applications.

'Research stuff about what might have happened to Bella.'

I stared at her and panicked at how she could have known. She just laughed at me and continued to walk into my closet.

'Don't look so afraid. I have been dating Jasper for over four years, I do know what abuse can do to a person. You have to let her talk to you in her own time. Don't force her or find information yourself. If we want to help her then we have to get her to trust us again and then get her to tell us what happened.'

I frowned, of course the pixie was right.

'Tapping into the physic power again, are we?' I mumbled grumpily, tiredness was keeping in now.

She appeared back into my room, dragging one of my belts behind her. She looked at me for a moment before bouncing out of the door.

'At least some of us aren't grouchy in the morning. Get some coffee before you face the rest of society,' she sang as she went into her room.

I looked over at the clock and decided that and hour and a half was plenty of time to make some coffee and get something to eat. I bumped into Emmett on my way downstairs and he looked like death.

'Rough night?' I asked as I past him.

He groaned and swore under his breath as he walked past our parents' room.

'In case you haven't noticed sunshine, it's still night and some people were still sleeping when you decided to have a shower in the middle of the night!'

I chuckled to myself and watched as he attempted to walk into his room, only to bang repeatedly into the door.

'You have to open it in order to get in,' I laughed.

'Yeah…well…ugh, I need caffeine,' he mumbled as he almost pulled to door off the hinges. What he was doing out of his room, fully dressed in yesterday's clothes, at this hour, I didn't even want to think about. A loud banging told me Emmett had come into contact with something solid.

'OW! Shhh-'

'Emmett Cullen!'

'-oe…um has anyone seen my shoe?'

I was laughing hard at this show. Dad was standing in the hall, staring at Emmett's door. He shook his head and mentioned something about 'unreasonable use of swearing'. He turned around and looked surprised at the sight of me going into the kitchen.

'Something must be bothering you. The last time you were up this early… actually you have never been up this early, you were even born during the afternoon.'

He smiled and started up the coffee machine, a purchase we made last year when we decided our family drinks too much caffeine for a normal pot to hold. I sat down and put more forehead on the cool marble worktop, effectively keeping myself conscious. The hum of the machine was the only noise in the kitchen, even the refrigerator was silent.

'Do you want to talk about it?'

My parents knew just about everything that was going on with us. We always had open relationships and with Dad being a trained paediatrician and having a completed a course in child psychology, he knew if something was wrong.

'It's Bella.'

'Ah, I thought it would be that.'

There was something he was keeping from me. He was a good liar, but I was the most perceptive person in the family. I waited for him to speak. He handed me a large cup of black coffee and sat on the stool next to me.

'I've been speaking to Charlie for a while now. He asked me before Bella came down to arrange for her file to be sent from her hospital in Phoenix to here. You and I are both aware of the confidentiality that surrounds files so I am not allowed to look at it until she comes in and I am not allowed to tell you anything.' He paused for a moment to sip some of his coffee.

'I will tell you this, the file is one of the largest I have seen. When I was speaking to Charlie he told me of how distant Bella became after her mother remarried. He said that every time they went on a vacation together, she would seem different. When he rang me yesterday he was afraid she had ran away or done something even worse.'

I clenched my cup harder.

'That was why I was anxious when I rang you.'

He downed the last of his coffee and stood to place the cup in the dishwasher.

'Anyway, I'm sure that you are happy to see her again, regardless of how she is.'

I smiled at him in thanks and walked over to get something for breakfast. Dad chuckled beside me.

'I think it's a bit late for breakfast.'

I looked at the clock. I had half an hour before school started and still had to make sure Alice and Emmett were up. I wanted to pick Bella up but I didn't want to have two annoying siblings in the car to make her more uncomfortable. Dad picked up his briefcase from beside the kitchen door and turned to me.

'I'll tell you what, I'll give Alice the keys to the Porsche and then you can pick up Bella. That way you get to her house on time, Alice gets a chance to ride her precious car, and your brother and sister finally realise how much they value your wake-up calls.'

He grinned at me and walked out. I ran upstairs to grab my bag and car keys and was in the Volvo in no time. Backing out of the driveway I could see no light coming from either of Alice's or Emmett's rooms so they probably had both decided to sleep in. I laughed at the thought of them rushing down the highway to school an hour late.

Turning off the highway, I was beginning to grow nervous. What if Bella had left already? What if she wasn't coming to school? What if she didn't want to see me again? I should have called first but I didn't have her number and I would be too embarrassed to ask Dad for it. I had never been more anxious to see a girl before.

Hang on, 'anxious to see a girl'? I was picking up Bella, as a friend, who used to hang out with me when we were younger, as a friend. She had only been in school a day and I was already developing feelings for her.

I shook my head to clear it as I pulled up in front of her house. Thankfully the truck was still there from when Alice and I dropped it off last night. Charlie's cruiser was gone. I was debating getting out and knocking on the door when it opened. Bella walked out and walked down the drive, looking down at the pavement below her. She looked startled when she seen my car outside her house. I opened my window and leaned out slightly.

'I thought, maybe, you'd want a lift to school.'

When she didn't respond or move from her frozen position, I launched into excuses.

'Well the roads are really bad at this time of year and after what happened yesterday-'

I stopped when she smiled at me and started to walk over to the passenger's side.

_Smooth, Edward, really smooth._ I mentally kicked myself and tried to at least be coherent.

Once Bella had got in, I sensed that talking was one of the last things she wanted to do. We sat in comfortable silence for the ride. Halfway through, I decided to put on some music. One of my favourite albums was left in the player from the time we drove to Seattle last month. Linkin Park blared out of the speakers. I apologised and adjusted the volume, Emmett and Alice seemed to have hearing problems and listened to music at an inhuman volume.

I looked over at Bella to see if the music was ok and she just smiled at me. I switched the track to one of my favourites.

_Memories consume  
__Like opening the wound  
__I'm picking me apart again_

I started to hum along, unaware of what was happening to Bella

**Bella Swan**

Waking up that morning had been difficult. My eyes were sore and my head pounded from crying so much yesterday. I looked up at my clock and rolled over to get some more sleep after seeing I had a good twenty minutes before my alarm would go off.

I sat up and looked back beside my clock.

There sat the glass of water and the bottle of sleeping pills. I hadn't taken any last night and yet I had no nightmares or trouble getting to sleep. That was the first night in a while that I had not needed any of the pills to sleep.

I rolled out of bed and walked into the bathroom. I took my time getting ready, keeping myself busy with trivial things and not rushing anything.

I was grateful that Edward and Alice had dropped my truck off last night. Charlie had already gone and walking was not desirable in this weather.

I felt surprisingly different today, lighter in a way. I put it down to people being nicer here than back in Phoenix. I was also surprised at my longing to get back to school. I had a strong feeling that the educational aspect had nothing to do with it though.

After packing my bag and grabbing my coat, I walked out. I looked down at the pavement and thought over how I would act around Edward and Alice today, if they still wanted to be around me. I couldn't _not_ talk to Edward again, Alice maybe I could get away with not saying anything to.

My head jerked up when I noticed a familiar shiny Volvo sitting outside the house. I froze when I seen Edward sitting there. He opened his window and offered me a lift. I tried to say yes but my body was frozen. He launched into excuses and I smiled, finally unfreezing from my position, and walked up to the car.

The ride was silent, but not awkward. Edward seemed to respect my want to not talk. After a few minutes he turned on some music.

I had to smile at Edward's manners. He kept looking at me to see if I was ok with the music. He seemed to get the message once he put on a different track. I settled into my seat and listened to the lyrics, watching the houses fly by outside.

_I don't know what's worth fighting for  
__Or why I have to scream  
__I don't know why I instigate  
__And say what I don't mean_

I mulled over the lyrics and thought about my own pathetic excuse for a life.

_I don't know how I got this way  
__I guess it's not alright_

I knew that a lot of the stuff that had happened in my life was not ok but I was the one who had brought it on, I was the one who had not done anything to stop it. If I had just said something back then, then I would not be sitting here, it wouldn't have happened.

_So I'm breaking the habit_

Maybe sitting here was a good thing though. Maybe if I had said something then something might have happened to me.

_I'm breaking the habit tonight_

Maybe I was meant to sit here. Maybe I was meant to tell Edward.

**A/N:** Next chapter will be Bella again, unless you guys want Edward for another one.

Lol I was just watching the Gossip Girl season 2 promos, I couldn't help laughing at Blair's 'A lifeguard is like a Kleenex, use it once and then throw it away'.

Just one small thing before I finish off, chapter 2 got 10 reviews but the last one got 6, would it be too much to ask for 9 reviews on this chapter? I'll get Alice to take Bella shopping in the next one if you do, or, whatever else you guys want to happen (within reason). :)


	5. Internal Arguments

**A/N: Ok, I don't know if I can keep Edward's POV up for more than one chapter at a time, there's not enough to write and plus Bella's POV kind of writes itself.**

**I have no clue how the American school day works so it will be a bit hazy.**

Thanks again to everyone who reviewed:

**Horsefreak01 **(again I'm sorry for the missing pm)**, bloodredeclipse, xo-harlequin girl-xo, modernxxmyth, sovoyita **(feel free to help me start up my own Word Challenge lol, dances like spongebob)**, and Luvntwilight**

And a great big thanks to **waterdemon9** who reviewed every chapter while reading!

**Back to Bella and the start of the school day**

**Sept 3rd**

**Bella Swan**

We pulled into the school parking lot swiftly, Edward's speed getting us there in record time. We were the only ones at school apart from Ms Cope and some teachers. The light drizzle that had started the morning had cleared up to leave menacing clouds that threatened a heavier rainfall.

I sat silently in the car, my hands fiddling with the zip on my jacket. Edward looked out the window before turning back to me.

'Do you want to sit here for a while or go out and find a bench or something?' he asked, keeping his gaze on me. I thought over the pros and cons of both options.

Sitting here would keep us dry and warm but would provide Edward with no distractions so his attention would always be on me. Going outside would more than likely make us cold and wet, would give plenty of things to distract Edward but would force me to be the centre of attention with the rest of the student population because of yesterday's gym fiasco.

'Here is fine,' I whispered slowly, not used to speaking freely for about seven weeks. Edward's face lit up when I spoke. I couldn't help but notice how much he had changed since we were small. His height matched his father's and his face had grown more defined and had lost all of it's youthful roundness. He definitely had grown up well but his hair and eyes were still exactly the same.

'Is everything alright?' He spoke softly, as if I were extremely breakable. His eyes showed that he had observed something about me.

I nodded, letting out a hoarse 'yes' in the process. He looked down nervously.

'It's just that when the song was playing, you seemed to change a little, as if you figured something out.'

My anxiety grew a little, if he could notice such a small change in me then I could hide nothing. I ached to reach back and grab my notepad so I wouldn't have to talk. Pulling at my zip once more, I dropped my gaze and shuffled uncomfortably in my seat.

Edward turned in his seat and pulled my bag from the backseat. He pulled out my notepad and pen and handed them to me. I smiled in thanks and went to grab them. He pulled away with a smile.

'You can use these only if you promise to at least try and speak more today. You don't even have to talk to anyone but me or Alice but at least try.'

I took the notepad and pen and put them in my lap. Staring at them made me thoughtful over the decision I had made. If I was to tell Edward then I knew I had to be able to trust him and that I would have to be able to talk to him. Using the notepad with Edward would only push me further away from talking to him.

My mind had split itself in two, arguing within me.

_You have to get used to talking to him. Don't use the notepad with him, just trust him._

_Don't trust anyone, remember the police station? You said to yourself that you would fade into the background. How can you become invisible if he keeps noticing you?_

_You've known Edward since you both were born, you can't turn away from him, he'll keep coming back if you do._

_Just don't talk to him!_

I shook my head to stop the inner turmoil and quickly chose my option. I had to talk to Edward. Even though I didn't have to tell him straight away, I knew that he wouldn't let me become invisible and that he would eventually ask for an answer.

He looked at me calmly, his face friendly but his eyes expectant. I took a deep breath and spoke again.

'Earlier…I was- I was thinking about something, it's not important. I just decided what option to chose, that's all.'

He nodded and smiled, accepting the answer. Looking out the window, I became aware of the cars that slowly began to fill up the parking lot. The loud voices of people going to their lockers or classes carried over to where we were parked.

I dreaded the prospect of having to face the rest of the student body. This was a small town, and the school had a total of 359 students, a tenth of my junior year in Phoenix. Word travelled fast and the story of the new girl having a fit during gym class would be today's 'hot gossip'. I could already imagine the rumours that might be spread explaining my behaviour. I only hoped they would be easy enough to deal with.

Some students that I recognised from yesterday walked by the Volvo, chattering amongst themselves.

'…_but that's not what I heard. I heard that she had some freak accident and gets a sort of electric shock whenever someone touches her.'_

'_That's stupid, I heard she had a bad relationship at her last school and went all freaky. My cousin said she saw her smash up her ex's car and that she can never be touched by a guy without reliving the break-up…'_

My stomach churned when the conversation hit me. Edward let out a controlled laugh but his hands clenched the underside of the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles white. I could see the visible frustration on his face. I smiled weakly and brushed it off.

'Amazing what great imaginations people have here, their creative writing grades must be astonishing.'

Edward smirked and his face brightened up. I looked at him curiously.

'What are you so… happy about?'

He shook his head and got out of the car. Before I could even unbuckle my seatbelt, he was opening my door. I smiled at him in thanks and got out. He grabbed our bags from the backseat and started to walk towards our classes. I tried to take my bag from him but he wouldn't let me carry it.

'What classes do you have?' he asked brightly. I thought over my schedule for today in my head.

'English, Spanish and then Government,' I replied, ignoring the stares that were cast in my direction.

Edward noticed the stares but tried to ignore them also. He nodded.

'So you are with Alice first and third period, if she shows up. I think Jasper is in your Spanish class and then Rosalie is also in your Government class.'

I bit my lip. Alice would be ok, from what I remembered she would probably probe me a little for details about my life in Phoenix but not too much. I hadn't met Jasper or Rosalie yet and was a bit apprehensive about that.

Almost everyone I had met so far I had known before I left. Rosalie and Jasper moved here after I had left and I didn't know much about them. I always hated meeting new people because of the dark unknown that surrounded them. You never knew if they would become your new enemy or your best friend and the chances of them being nice to you were very slim unless you really got on well.

A ringing noise pulled me out of my thoughts. Edward reached into his pocket and pulled out a cell phone.

'Sorry,' he mumbled as he opened it up, 'Hello?'

The high pitched screaming that emitted from the small device made me wince. Edward pulled the phone away from his ear and blinked a couple of times, shaking his head.

'Alice, you didn't get up on time…No I did not purposely abandon you, Dad left your keys on the kitchen counter.'

Another high pitched 'noise' came from the phone. I'd hate to have that phone close to my ears.

'Yes, calm down and make sure Emmett is at least dressed before you drag him here.'

He flipped the phone closed and put it back in his pocket.

'Sorry about that.'

We stopped outside my class and Edward handed me my bag.

'So, do you promise to eat lunch with us to make up for yesterday or do you mind if I sit with you alone today?'

I was surprised that he would abandon his family to sit with me, but I had been surprised ever since he found me in the gym yesterday. He must have seen the indecision on my face.

'How about you meet Rosalie and Jasper first and then we see if you would feel comfortable eating with them, but I am not letting you sit by yourself for lunch,' he gave me another smile and turned to go to his class.

I took a deep breath and prepared to face the inevitable, a classroom full of people gossiping about me.

Opening the door, the buzz of chatter constantly charged through the air. As I placed my jacket up with the others, some of it quietened. I ducked my head and walked up to the teacher. The room became silent as everyone took note of my arrival.

I handed the teacher the envelope and slip of paper from yesterday and glued my eyes to the floor.

'Ah, Bella, is it? I hope you're feeling well today dear. We wouldn't want you to miss too many classes so soon in your first week here.'

I risked a glance up and saw that my English teacher had unruly black hair. Her eyes were deep blue and her face reminded me of the generic, motherly actresses you always see in movies; created to look friendly and warm. She also had a thick Boston accent.

She opened the envelope and scanned through the letter, making the same sympathetic faces that most of the other teachers made. Stuffing the letter and note quickly into the envelope, she taped it up and handed it back to me.

'Now I understand you are acquainted with Alice Cullen, so if we move…' she looked around the class and sighed, 'Mr Crowley it seems that today is your lucky day, your assigned seat for two years is no more, you are free to sit beside Mr Cheney again. But, if you cause anymore trouble then you will be removed.'

Tyler Crowley jumped out of his seat, gleeful in his freedom and ran over to a seat beside a short boy with glasses. They slapped each other on the shoulder and started an intense discussion.

I walked quickly over to the now vacant seat and slumped down. Whispers started around me but once class began, they stopped. I took out my books and commenced taking detailed notes, even though English was one of my best subjects.

The reading list was compiled of books that I had read many times before. Tonight's assignment was, to much of the classes dismay, a five page creative writing exercise revolving around the title 'If I were president…'.

I snorted at the class's lack of creative skills in academic situations. A five year old could have been asked 'what would you do if you were president?' and would have come up with some answer involving candy, ponies, toys and Power Rangers. The class of seventeen year olds around me seemed incapable of even that amount of logic.

We were given half of the class to plan and start the paper. I dove straight into planning the paper and had a page finished when the door opened.

'Sorry I'm late. The car broke down and we were stuck on the highway for an hour.'

Alice Cullen seemed to be able to talk her way out of everything. The teacher swallowed her excuse and even asked if she needed a lift home.

Alice sat down beside me and gave me a huge grin, tearing off a piece of paper from her notebook and scribbling something down. She tossed it onto my desk and started to doodle on her notebook.

_Yay you're in! What do we have to do?_

I explained the assignment and tossed the paper back to her. Her face dropped and she looked at me in horror. Quickly, she scribbled something down and passed the note to me again, starting to write something furiously on an empty page.

_Five pages?! Is she insane? I have plans to go to the mall in Port Angeles tonight to check out this season's new arrivals. How can I get this paper done before then?!_

I smiled and looked over. My mouth dropped. In the space of two minutes she had already written a page and was now halfway through her second one, scribbling at a rapid pace. I wrote back to her before continuing my paper.

_How can you write so quickly?_

I had barely written a sentence when she passed back the note.

_Easy, I'm basing my paper on shopping and fashion._

I shook my head and finished up the second page. Trust Alice to write five pages about how she would change the world of fashion.

I had finished over half the paper when the bell rang and I quickly packed up and walked out the door. I looked around and spotted the building I had to go to for Spanish.

A flash of black flew past me and bumped into the back of a tall, blonde haired guy a few feet ahead of me. When the flash stopped moving I noticed it was Alice. She reached up and kissed the guy before chatting to him. I assumed the guy must be Jasper.

The stares of everyone around me were still noticeable. The spine prickling feeling of someone watching you was uncomfortable enough but having most of the school staring at you was surprisingly frightening.

Pulling my hair over my shoulders, I walked into the classroom. The walls were covered with bright posters of either Spanish festivals or phrases. Only a few people had arrived to the class and the teacher was writing some notes on the board.

I walked awkwardly up to the front, waiting for the teacher to finish. She turned around and surveyed me before taking the envelope and sheet of paper. She sent me off to an empty desk without a word. I couldn't tell if I liked her or not; she gratefully did not make a huge fuss over me but I couldn't tell if she was doing it out of kindness or annoyance.

I slid into the seat and copied down what was written on the board.

'Hey, Bella Swan, is it?'

I looked up and was greeted by Jasper sitting down in the desk in front of me. I nodded and he waved.

'Jasper Hale. I'm Rosalie's twin and dating Alice.'

Thankfully he didn't try to shake my hand or touch me. The teacher called out the register and started the lesson. My grades in Spanish had always been average, good and acceptable, but not exactly A's.

The lesson passed slowly and while we waited for the bell to ring, everyone started to talk. I noticed the girl beside me sat quietly, waiting for the bell to go. From what I remembered her name was Angela. Jasper, too, sat silently, not participating in the conversations around him.

As soon as the bell rang, the class jumped out of their seats and ran out the door. I lagged behind to avoid the large group. Turning right to go to one of the other buildings, I spotted Edward walking away from the door next to my Government class. He smiled and waved when he saw me. I dodged a large group of people that had stopped to chat and walked over to my next class.

'…yeah but there was no way they could have won.'

'Still a great shot man.'

My breath caught in my throat and I began to splutter and choke. The visions which had haunted me for weeks flew though my mind. My knees gave in and I fell to the ground. I could see Edward's face change to shock and worry as he watched me collapse. Memories threatened to come barrelling through my mental barriers.

_A dark room with barely any light was what was always behind the door. No-one was allowed in there, it was 'his room'. I opened the door cautiously, curious as to what was so important that it needed to be kept behind a closed door._

_A chair, bed and dresser were the only furniture in the bare room. I walked slowly over to the dresser and pulled open the top right hand drawer. Nothing._

_I moved to the left. Nothing. The dresser was empty so I checked the bed, people always hid things under their mattress._

_I pulled it up and was not ready for what was under it. There, gleaming in the dim light that filtered through the curtains was-_

'Nobody touch her. Just give her some air,' a slightly familiar voice boomed. My eyes jerked open and I realised I was whimpering. Jasper knelt beside me, trying to keep the crowd that had gathered at bay.

'Bella? Bella are you ok?' Edward pushed through the crowds and knelt beside me, 'What happened?' he asked Jasper.

'No idea, just get her to the nurse and I'll tell you what I saw happening.'

I felt a hand slip under my back and one beneath my knees, and before I knew it I was off the ground. Edward held me easily, as if I weighed 10 pounds. Jasper started to clear a way for us though the crowd.

I was still shaking violently but the whimpering had stopped once Edward had touched me. I clung to his shirt pathetically as he carried me in the direction of the office. Once we had gotten away from all of the other students, Edward and Jasper stopped. I was shifted slightly as Edward sat down on a bench but he did not let go of me. Jasper stood beside us.

'I don't know what happened. She was just passing by the basketball team when suddenly she went down. Something they said must have triggered an attack.'

Edward nodded at what Jasper said and looked down at me. He looked as if he was in pain. The shaking had subsided but had not stopped. I sat up and slid out of Edward's lap onto the seat beside him. He left his arm around me and grabbed my hand.

'Bella, do you want to go back to class?' he asked softly.

I shook my head. Jasper nodded.

'It would be better for you, Bella, if you went home and took it easy for a while,' he advised. Nodding my head slowly, I stood up, only to stumble and be grabbed from behind.

'I don't think you will be able to walk by yourself for another few minutes,' Edward chuckled. He wrapped his arm around me again and supported most of my weight as he helped me walk out to the office.

I didn't pay much attention after that. I was vaguely aware of being carried to his car, being driven home and being carried out. It wasn't until he asked for my keys that I snapped back to reality. Opening the door, Edward brought me into the sitting room and placed me on the couch. He ran back and closed the door.

'Do you want to tell me what happened today?' he whispered.

I thought about it for a few moments, thinking of everything that had happened over the past few weeks. I had promised myself not to talk, but then ended up speaking to Edward. I had promised myself to fade into the background but had made friends with Edward and Alice again. I had also promised to tell Edward everything.

I swallowed and sat up, nodding weakly.

'Yes.'

**A/N: Now I may or may not tell you everything in the next chapter, it all depends on if you guys can blow the previous reviews out of the water (yes I know bribery but do you really want to know what happened or not?)**

**I want to apologise for the mistake I made in the lyrics in the last chapter. I hate mistakes myself but was too busy trying to get it finished to realise I had typed 'It'ms' into my laptop and it changed it to 'I'm'.**

**Don't worry, Bella will be subjected to shopping with Alice in later chapters but not right now.**

**Review!!**


	6. The Truth

**A/N: The chapter you've all been waiting for has arrived! I feel actually bad for giving into you so early in the story. I wasn't planning on doing this chapter for a good while.**

**I've split this into two shorter chapters because one long one would be too much to do at the moment.**

**Now because I am going to spend a ridiculous amount of time writing and rewriting and editing this chapter tonight to make it as perfect as I can, I want you all to at least review it, please? I want to hit at least 45 before I post the second part, and yes that is possible considering there are over 30 of you receiving an email for this update.**

**A couple of things that I want to point out before I start:**

**No, I do not have a problem**

**Yes there is still more to come**

**No Edward and Bella will not get together straight away. Sorry but she has to gain his trust and return to a relatively normal life.**

**Sept 3rd**

**Bella Swan**

Edward stared at me before sitting down beside me. He took my hand and waited for me to begin. Taking deep breaths, I finally calmed down enough to start.

'You remember that after Charlie and Renée got the divorce, I was forced to leave Forks with her?' He nodded without emotion and I continued.

'Well everything seemed to be alright for about a year, I missed Forks and all of you but we slowly settled in. Renée got a job teaching at a Kindergarten school and soon after that she met,' I choked before saying the name, '…she met Phil.'

Edward tensed when he observed my fear.

'He was nice enough for a few months while they dated. I had never really known other men apart from Charlie and your dad, so I had very little to base him on. After six months she decided to marry him.'

_I sat quietly in my room waiting for Mom to come back so the babysitter could leave. I was eight, I didn't need a babysitter any more. The front door opened and the sounds of Rachel leaving drafted up the stairs._

_I ran down and jumped into Mom's arms. She hugged me and pulled back, a large grin on her face._

'_Bella, sweetie, you know Phil?'_

_The man I preferred to call 'him' walked in from behind Mom. He waved at me but it was more of a gesture to clear the air of a bad smell. Mom took his hand._

'_Well how would you like him to become your new Daddy?'_

_I made a face. I already had a dad, why would I need him?_

'_But my dad lives in Forks, he can't be my dad if I already have one,' I muttered. Unfortunately 'he' caught it._

_His face turned to anger and he dropped down to my height._

'_Listen here, _darling_,' he hissed, 'I love your mom, your dad didn't and that's why he's not with her.'_

_My eyes welled up._

'_And if you do anything to mess this up for me- I mean us, then you will have to be punished for being bold.'_

I briefly described the time that Renée announced her engagement to 'him'.

'For a few months after the wedding, it was like that a lot, then, before my ninth birthday, things took a turn for the worst.'

I swallowed and glanced at Edward. He was having a hard time controlling his frustration. Figuring it was now or never, I stood up and pulled my t-shirt up slightly, exposing the side of my stomach, and the four inch white scar. Edward's sharp intake of breath was the only sound for a few moments. I sat down quickly and became worried when he started shaking. He shook his head and motioned for me to continue.

'The week before my birthday, Renée was organising a party. I never got on with any of the people at school so there was no-one to invite. Ph-P… 'he' seemed to be aggravated by how much time Renée spent on me, when I didn't deserve it.'

… '_It always has to be about you doesn't it?'_

_He continued to approach me in the small sitting room and once I backed into the wall, he smiled._

'_Maybe for once in your pathetic life you will finally understand that nobody cares.'_

'The day before my birthday, 'he' was called to a meeting. He had been accepted into a minor league baseball team. Renée was delighted and proposed that we had a party the next day in celebration of my birthday and his promotion. That night, a huge fight broke out between the two of them.'

_I sat on the stairs, listening to them shouting._

'_But it's her birthday, she deserves at least some form of a party!'_

'_She can have the party another day, she gets enough attention as it is. I'm getting sick of having to deal with your baggage. She's just a burden in this house!'_

_The smashing that came after that made me jump and shriek. 'He' ripped open the door and pulled me down into the hall._

'_What do you think you're doing? Eavesdropping? I'll teach you to eavesdrop in my house.'_

'He pulled me down from the stairs and punched me on my left side, sending me flying into the fireplace. My right side caught on the table and the corner created a huge gash near my stomach,' I smiled bitterly, 'I can still remember Renée trying to call an ambulance but 'he' just told her to pick me up and drive me to the hospital herself.'

I recalled seeing the state of the room after the fight, blood stained the curtain where Renée had sat after 'he' punched her, the table was smashed from where I fell.

'The violence stopped and started every now and then. Sometimes he would come home and give her a kiss before watching the television, other times he would come in and just slap her before going straight back out again. As his work progressed, his team were offered the chance to tour for a year. Renée couldn't go with him because of her steady job here and me. He then realised that I was the one causing all of the problems.'

… '_If it wasn't for you then your mom could come with me, you're just a useless piece of baggage.'_

… '_Well maybe if you finally admitted your incompetence then everything would be ok.'_

… '_You're extremely lucky that I have put up with you for so long. I could easily just stick you in Social Services.'_

'Every so often he would occasionally hit me for doing something wrong. One time he gave out to me for cooking something wrong and I ended up knocking over a pot of sauce, giving myself this,' I pulled down my sleeve and showed him the pinkish-white mark on my shoulder from where the sauce scalded me.

'From then on he claimed that if I went to the police or told anyone he would claim I was harming myself.'

I didn't include all of the other threats given to me over the years by him, Edward didn't need to know them.

'When I turned eleven, he started coming home later, always acting strange. I asked Renée once why he was being odd and she just started sobbing.'

'_But Mom, what's going on with him?'_

_Her shoulders heaved as she smiled weakly._

'_It's ok honey. He's just not being himself. His not in control of his life anymore. He's acting strangely because he has a problem with alcohol.'_

I smirked, as if alcohol had anything to do with his 'problem', if anything it just increased the intensity of it.

'She told me he was an alcoholic and that the alcohol was making him act weird, I never believed her.'

I paused to compose myself and delved into some of the more harder parts.

'Whenever Renée was changing, I noticed more and more marks on her skin from where he had hit her. I was afraid of him already but seeing the damage on another person made me terrified. We were always cautious when we were in the house. No-one could make any noise, no-one could do anything that he didn't allow.'

'When I was twelve, he moved into the spare room, saying that no-one could go in there. One day I decided that I had to see what was behind the door.'

I shuffled in my seat and focused my gaze on the floor.

'There was nothing in the room except for the bed and dresser. I opened the dresser's drawers only to find a small plastic bag. Back then I had no idea what it was, but after a few years I finally figured it out. He also took drugs,' I laughed at myself, 'Imagine it, him leaving a bag of cocaine in a house where a twelve year old could have taken it, thinking it was candy'

Edward gritted his teeth and closed his eyes. 'Was that all that was in the room?'

I shook my head, keeping hysterical laughter at bay.

'Another day, I went in again. This time a chair had been added to the furniture. I checked the dresser and it was empty. I lifted up the mattress and…there was a shotgun.'

Edward froze, accidentally squeezing my hand tightly before dropping it and standing up. He paced the room a few times, his hands balled into fists. Seeing him this way brought back memories of 'him' doing exactly the same thing before exploding with anger.

Edward stopped walking when he noticed the tears streaking my face. He dropped down before me and wrapped his arms around my shaking form. I sobbed for a few minutes before he broke the silence.

'Is… that why you freaked out yesterday, because Mike's touch reminded you of…,' he trailed off, too angry to mention the name, 'and then today, they said something to bring back a memory?'

I nodded, pulling back. I wiped my face and calmed my breathing, waiting for my throat to open up again.

Edward sat on the floor, his own breathing becoming shallow.

'But then… what happened to Renée?'

I dropped my head, a new wave of tears washing over me. Knowing I couldn't admit out loud what had happened, I motioned for him to come upstairs. He half-carried me, half-helped me up the stairs and into my room. I switched on my computer and opened the search engine. Typing with shaky fingers, I searched the one thing I had hoped to never learn about again.

_Renée Dwyer Phoenix_

The results loaded and I avoided looking at them for a few seconds.

'Bella…,' Edward's voice was low as he grasped the back of my chair tightly. I looked up and was faced with the dreaded results.

_Mother of one shot dead in own home_

_Renée Dwyer, much loved teacher, mother and wife, was…_

_Husband visibly upset by the shooting at the funeral…_

I opened my mouth and tried to spit out what was bitterly held in since the incident but was interrupted by the door opening below.

'Bella? You in here?'

I looked at the clock and noticed three o'clock had been and gone, it was closer to four. Charlie had come home early again.

Edward went to go downstairs but I stopped him. Clearing my throat I called down to Charlie.

'I'm up here. We'll be down in a moment.'

Charlie stopped moving about downstairs and appeared at the bottom of the stairs.

'Good to hear you again, kid.'

He waved at Edward as we walked down to him.

'Thanks again Edward for getting her home safe again.'

'It's no problem at all, sir,' Edward smiled.

I had a feeling that Charlie wanted to know why I was speaking again and I made up an excuse to get a drink so as he and Edward had a chance to talk. I didn't feel like repeated anything to anyone.

As I filled the glass up with water, I felt as if a large burden had been lifted by telling Edward but, another burden took it's place. Now there was a strong chance I had to face the police again to make a statement. Making a statement would lead to a court appearance, and that would mean going up against 'him'. If I lost then he would know I told someone, he would be angry and then he would come to get me. I couldn't put anyone here in danger.

'Bella?'

Edward walked slowly up to me and stood beside me in the kitchen, the light of the setting sun filtered through the window and hit his face, making his features more exaggerated. His eyes had an enormous amount of anger and frustration but his face was masked in a calm state. When he met my gaze, he expression looked pained.

'Charlie wants to know. Do you want to tell him?'

I bit my lip and shook my head.

'Could you tell him?' I asked feebly.

He squeezed my hand and gave me a small smile, nodding.

'Do you want to go upstairs or sit with us?'

I shook my head. 'I'll go upstairs, his reaction won't be as silent as yours.'

Edward smiled and led me up to my room, making sure I was ok before going back down.

I fell back on my bed and let my emotions take over. My eyes welled up again and angry sobs shook my entire body. Waiting for the shaking to die down, I listened intently for any noise downstairs. I knew Edward had closed both my door and the sitting room door in an attempt to not let me hear anything.

The door was pulled open downstairs and it hit the wall with a bang. I sat up and wiped my eyes. Charlie was shouting.

'That… I'm going down to the station, stay here with her, I don't want her left alone for one second.'

I heard him pull his jacket off the wall and run to the front door. He slammed it shut and the sound of the cruiser screaming out of the driveway was muffled by my closed window. I walked out of my room and spotted Edward standing at the bottom of the stairs running his hands through his hair.

He smiled when he heard me come to the top of he stairs and jogged up them. I let the sobs control me once more as he pulled me towards him and picked me up. Soon I was lying on my bed, I clung to his arm when he went to stand up and he sat down on my bed with me.

He tried to soothe me but nothing made an effect. I finally spat out what had been kept in earlier and for seven weeks.

'The worst part is he was never caught.'

Edward's face hardened again, thinking of the prospect of 'him' running free.

Exhausted, I desperately tried to stay awake, knowing that after having such vivid memories today my nightmares would be twice as bad. A melodic humming noise lulled me to near unconsciousness. Before I slipped under I realised it was Edward.

**A/N: I know it's short but this means I can write the next one and have it up soon. Also having about 5 pages would be too much because of what I put into this one.**

**Review!! And thanks to all of you who reviewed in the last chapter. In my haste to get this up soon, I forgot to mention all of you at the beginning, I'll make sure to mention all of you in the next chapter.**


	7. Planning and Investigations

**A/N: I'm acknowledging all of your reviews before I start rambling:**

**Thanks go out to:**

**HermioneLF,  
****sovoyita** (you should all check out her story, 'Blinding Lights', it's so good),  
**CallalillyAngel,  
****Bloodredeclipse** (the reason Bella freaked out with the basketball team was because one of them said 'great shot' and that triggered the gun memory)  
**modernxxmyth,  
****xo-harlequin girl-xo,  
****ericcaxx,  
****Luvntwilight,  
****Horsefreal01,  
****TwilightNerd,  
****bouncestep of thunderclan,  
****babygirl71,  
****Charmed Chick4,  
****waterdemon9,  
****FindingEdwardformyown,  
****IceWouldSuffice,  
****RAWR.cookie.,  
****XXLilPixieCalledSTRADXx**(no Aimee, clingfilm will not be used as a murder weapon in this story lol good idea though)

**I have tried to keep this as realistic as possible, Bella's past and her condition have happened to many other people and I was actually surprised that this story has touched some of you. Bella's condition is real and is extremely hard to recover fully from, some people never regain the ability to talk and some never interact with any other person. Her 'recovery' so far is actually based on a true story that I learnt about a while ago from a friend. According to professionals, having strong or familiar memories can either increase the condition or make it fade away, so in this case, for her to interact with Edward makes her mind bring back pleasant memories of her youth instead of conjuring bad ones.**

**The drama is far from over and I'm bringing in 'him' now, this chapter is a little more… darker than the others because some of it is from Phil's POV. Also I have no idea how police stations work so this is based off the one episode of Law and Order I watched months ago.**

**Sept 3****rd**** 5pm Forks' Police Station**

**Charlie Swan**

I couldn't believe it. Almost ten years of being subjected to that… it was inhumane, sickening, unforgivable.

Swerving sharply to avoid hitting the trees lining the road, I decided that driving without a coherent thought was not a good idea. Calming down, I finally took in my surroundings and turned off the highway to go to the station.

I knew Bella was safe at home. Edward had always been a good friend to her before and we had never gotten any trouble from the Cullen kids. I was still extremely anxious to get back to her.

The worst part was the fact that I had only found out about Renée now. At the night of the incident, I had gotten a call to say that an armed robbery had taken place at the house and that my ex-wife had been killed. I was distraught that she had died but was shaken by the fact that Bella had been in the house during it. Now, from what Edward had told me, she could have been in the same room.

I pulled the cruiser aggressively into a spot outside the door and stormed out.

"Hey Charlie. What's got you in so late? I thought you asked Mark to cover you so you could go home early this week," John sat behind the desk, waving at me as I walked in. He quickly stood up once he noticed my anger. "What's happened?"

I ran my hands through my thinning hair and took deep, calming breaths.

"I need to see if I can start an investigation on a suspected murderer. I have information that he physically and mentally abused his wife and stepdaughter. I also know that he is a known alcoholic and drug user."

Mark nodded and took out the keys to the back rooms. He keyed in the code to the new door lock we had fitted a few months ago and unlocked the grill. I slid it back and pushed open the door. Walking past the empty cells to the back rooms, I felt that I had to bring this… psychotic maniac to justice. I sat down in front of the computer and picked up the phone.

"_Downtown Phoenix station"_

"This is Police Chief Swan from Forks, Washington. I have evidence against a Phil Dwyer from your area, that he committed a murder and physically abused his wife and stepdaughter. I want to ask for an investigation."

I tapped my fingers against the metal table and waited for the officer to process the information.

"_We will see what we can do and send any information to your station. For information, do you know who Mr Dwyer killed?"_

I inhaled sharply and switched on the station's computer.

"His wife. Renée Dwyer."

"_We'll launch the investigation as soon as possible and be in touch soon."_

I put down the phone and tried searching any files for information. After hours of searching all I could find out was that he played for a minor league team before moving to- I froze and scrolled down.

_Phil Dwyer was last seen a week after his wife's funeral in Phoenix. He then transferred to a team in Seattle to be closer to his stepdaughter who currently resides with her father since her mother's death._

I choked and slammed my fist into the table.

He was in Washington, only a few hours away from here.

I quickly searched all minor league teams in the Seattle area but none of them had anyone by the name of Phil Dwyer.

I groaned in frustration but then something hit me.

He knew that he would be out eventually.

The only person who knew was Bella. If she told anyone then he knew he would be in trouble.

He had changed his name to avoid the police.

**Sept 3****rd**** An apartment in Seattle**

**Phil Dwyer**

It was too easy.

The law enforcers in this money-run country were too easy to fool.

A couple of phone calls and a few thousand dollars later, I had a new identity, a new look and a new job. The system was too easy to con.

It was even easy to fake a recommendation from one of the top sales companies in the country. They even used to have an employee who had the same name as me and looked like me. All I had to do was waltz into the office, shove the paper in front of their faces and joke about how my old 'boss' used to enjoy talking to my new one.

I had secured the first six months rent on the apartment using cash. I never used cards or cheques; their too easy to trace. Good old cash never leaves a mark, and plus my landlord was easy to buy. A couple of grand and I had his word that he had no clue when I was here or when I wasn't; just in case someone came along to question him.

All I had to do was lie low here for a few weeks, gain a reputation as a nice, warm-hearted salesman and then go for a little visit to Forks.

The girl was cracked enough that I had faith in the fact that she wouldn't open her mouth for a while. But then again. I'm never one to take chances. Her mother was the result of that.

The woman had somehow grown curious over the years as to why an old name-tag that I had forgotten to throw out had 'Kevin Hill' on it. She eventually snooped around and found out that it was my old name. Once she had found out that, she had to go.

It was only a matter of time before I disposed of her. She was getting on my nerves and her daughter was a piece of filth. They constantly got in my way and didn't tell enough people what a wonderful and supportive man I was.

Renée even commented on my drinking habits. The woman doesn't even know what else I did and she complained about my drinking?

The girl was just as worse, I hated her from day one and she hated me. I managed to intimidate her though, eventually. She realised it was wise to do as I say and avoid me otherwise.

The police in Phoenix were easily fooled. I had managed to get the gun covered with DNA from a wanted criminal in the area who was already on the run. When they found the weapon after I called them, distraught with what had happened, they came and immediately knew who had touched the gun. I had magically happened to be wearing gloves every time I handled the gun.

I sat in my apartment, waiting for the delivery. Once the bell rang I got up and made sure the television was on.

A tall, thin guy stood there in the uniform of the local pizza place. He held the box in one hand while squinting at his order sheet.

"One large, extra olive for Mr Enton?"

I smiled broadly and let him in. He went and put the box on the table and opened it. I pulled out the cash and swapped it for the gear. He then thrust a large envelope at me, muttering, "Your sides."

I took it and let him out, glancing around to make sure no-one was there. No chances were taken. The same employee of the local pizza place always delivered to here. He kept quiet and was discreet about exchanging the drugs and any other things I needed. Like this envelope for example.

I opened it up and examined the contents.

_Perfect_.

Inside was a detailed map of Forks, the high school and the area where the girl lived. Photos of the town were given to familiarise myself to it. I knew that as the weeks past, I would be supplied with more information.

It was the standard procedure. An amateur would go straight in without the right knowledge, get caught, and then be sentenced. If you had any experience you would wait, that was what the people supplying me were looking for. They had to find out if I was trustworthy and experienced, otherwise their cover would be blown.

I looked at the maps, memorising every street, every turn, every place. I then looked at the photos, matching every street corner and every shop. Some people thought that this was unnecessary but it was crucial. I had to know everything. I never knew if I had to ask the employee at the clothes shop whether he knew of one of the girl's friends or if I had to stop for gas and dig around the gas station for any information. Every piece mattered and every clue would be used.

Satisfied that I had successfully memorised as much as possible, I pulled out a six-pack of beer and settled down in front of the television. The phone rang at exactly ten-thirty, as expected.

"Hello?"

"_Hey Frank, it's Sam. Sorry to bother you so late at night. The meeting for tomorrow has been cancelled and been rescheduled to next Monday. I'll fax you over the details soon. You don't have to come in tomorrow as you were meant to be out of town."_

I smiled.

"I'll come in anyway. Can't let the team down. There's a huge project starting soon and I want to do all that I can do."

"_You do too much around here as it is. I'll see you tomorrow then. Have a good night. Bye."_

I hung up the phone and turned off the television. I picked up the cans of beer and brought them back into the kitchen. Hiding the gear and dumping the half-eaten pizza, I made my way into the bedroom.

I had managed to get one of the newly built apartments near downtown Seattle. If I rented one of the cheaper ones in the suburbs, then it would be like hanging a giant neon sign over my head. The police always looked in those for criminals. Also they usually had shorter rent periods which would indicate the person not wanting to stay for too long. Staying in one of the more luxurious blocks, and having a six month lease, I put out the idea that I was a wealthy business man working in the area.

I lay down in bed and went over tomorrow plans in my head. I wouldn't get another pizza delivery for a few days but I was getting the computer tomorrow, another plus. Soon I would have access to the Internet, and the use of one of the most sophisticated hacker systems available on the market.

**A/N: That's the second part, short, I know. Just so you know, I'm making Phil up so don't think he's real or anything. I have no idea what's out there but so far he is fictional. Review and tell me what you think. It would be brilliant to surpass yesterday's record of 12 reviews and hit the 65 mark.**


	8. Staying At Home

**A/N: Ok so no-one likes Phil, good, otherwise I would be afraid of you. I think a lot of you have described me or this story using the word 'awesomeness' and now I think it has become my favourite word lol. Everything I have put into this story is as realistic as possible; the events, Bella's condition, even the things Phil (AKA Frank) does or gets.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed:**

**Luvntwilight,**

**Horsefreak01,**

**babygirl71,**

**TwilightNerd,**

**Becky94,**

**bloodredeclipse,**

**waterdemon9,**

**TwilightLover15,**

**LolaluvsEdward,**

**Xx EdwardLova xX** (thanks for taking the time to review chapters 4,5,6 and 7)**,**

**xXLilPixieCalledSTRADXx**(ok again with the clingfilm! Lol bees)

**lgr42293**

**sovoyita**

**I know some of you might hate the great big list but I can't respond to any of the reviews personally so this is my way to make up for it.**

**Sept 4th**

**Bella Swan**

I woke drowsy and disorientated. From the lack of light shining through the window, I knew it was nowhere near time to get up. My eyes were sore and swollen and my body was weak. I couldn't even remember what had happened yesterday.

I closed my eyes and rolled over to get some more sleep but bumped into something solid. My eyes flew open. There, fast asleep in my bed, was Edward.

Memories of last night flashed through my head. I slumped back onto my pillow and went over everything. I recalled telling Edward, then him telling Charlie. I grimaced when I remembered Charlie's reaction, I didn't even know if he had come home last night.

I looked over at Edward's sleeping form and smiled. He looked so…cute. I couldn't think of how to describe it, he looked more like when he was younger. He stirred, his face scrunching up, and reached out searching for something. When his hands came into contact with my arms, he pulled me towards him. He was still fast asleep but had me against his body in a death grip.

I tried to push myself away from him but he was too strong and I was weak. I gave up and wriggled about, making myself more comfortable. Once I stopped moving, Edward loosened his arms but kept them around me. I breathed in his scent and I felt myself being pulled under. Gladly giving in to my exhaustion, I fell into a deep sleep.

When I woke again, light was pouring in through my window. I sat up and disentangled myself carefully from Edward, trying not to wake him. He opened his eyes when I stood up, and stretched. I walked over to my closet and pulled out something to wear.

"What time is it?" Edward asked, yawning halfway through.

I picked up my clock and checked the time. I panicked.

"Crap, it's gone eleven," I rushed around my room, picking up my bathroom bag on the way. I heard Edward swearing as he got out of the bed.

As I ran across to the bathroom, Charlie's door opened, "Wait up, Bells."

He looked terrible, but then again, so did Edward and I.

"I called Carlisle and the school, you're both excused for the day," he rubbed his stubbly chin and dodged past me into the bathroom, "and I always get the first shower," he smiled.

I relaxed and walked back into my room. Edward was hastily pulling on his shoes and dialling a number on his phone. I smiled as he pulled at his unruly hair in exasperation when he got their voice-mail.

"Charlie called your dad and the school, we don't have to go in today."

He looked at me and chuckled nervously, "Good because if I was late then I would be killed by Dad."

I placed my bag and clothes on my desk and went to sit beside him on the bed. Nervously, I crossed my legs and wrapped my arms around myself.

"Thanks for…staying last night and for listening," I mumbled, looking at my toes. Edward pulled my chin around so I would look at him.

"It was no problem. I called Alice last night and she said she would bring your truck over after school. Do you want me to stay here today with you?"

My mind automatically screamed yes but I deliberated like I always do with any decision.

"I would like it but if you have something to do-"

"I have nothing to do."

I smiled and stood to go to the bathroom once I heard Charlie leaving it. "You should go home though and change."

He grimaced and feigned smelling himself. "I smell that bad, huh?"

I laughed and went into the bathroom. The hot water of the shower always calmed me. Spending longer than usual in the steaming hot water, I let it wash away all of yesterday's events, leaving me feeling refreshed, both physically and mentally.

I stepped out of the shower and dried myself quickly. Glancing in the mirror, I stopped and took a good look at myself. My body was still the same but my face seemed to have more life in it. I smiled and got dressed, walking slowly downstairs to join Charlie.

Lowered voices greeted me as I walked down the hall.

"…_I know that you understand my want for her not to be alone at any time."_

"_Of course, I wouldn't want her in any danger either. Have you found anything yet?"_

I stopped just before the kitchen door and listened to Charlie and Edward.

"_I went down to the station and asked for an investigation in Phoenix but then found out something on the Internet-"_

The ringing of the telephone interrupted him.

"_I'll go check on Bella."_

I turned and dashed quickly to the stairs, looking as if I had just come down them. Edward opened the door and smiled when he spotted me.

"Hey, I was just coming to look for you. Charlie made some breakfast."

I smiled and identified the distinct smell of burnt food wafting from the opened kitchen door.

"I think you forgot the operative word of 'tried'. My guess is he didn't put oil with the eggs and cremated the toast."

Edward laughed quietly. "You forgot that he didn't put the lid on the blender either."

Walking into the kitchen, I passed Charlie on the phone and grimaced at the mess. Unidentifiable, liquid-like substances covered the tiles on the wall. The frying pan had burnt remains of fried eggs and smoke still emitted from the grill. I pulled up my sleeves and launched into cleaning the kitchen.

Edward came beside me when I was scrubbing at the frying pan and wet a cloth to mop up the tiles. He finished before I did and grabbed the pan from me, my attempts barely making a dent in the cemented remains. Quickly, he shifted all of the egg and passed the pan to me to dry. We worked as a team and were done before Charlie had hung up the phone.

His face was scrunched up and he dropped his head to his hands on the counter with a humph. He seemed frustrated, annoyed, angry, and, afraid. The first three emotions were evident on his face but the last could only be seen in his eyes, and even I had trouble finding it there. He rhythmically tapped his fingers against the counter while rubbing the back of his head. He didn't move his face from it's place on his crossed arms.

Edward watched Charlie patiently, waiting for him to talk. His eyes went hard as soon as Charlie got off the phone and hadn't changed since. I glanced between the two and stood silently. Could that have been news on Phil? Could something be wrong?

My fear grew inside me and my face grew whiter, all warmth and colour draining quickly. Charlie finally stood up, his hands clenching as they fell off the counter. He looked at Edward before nodding. Taking deep breaths, he closed his eyes and spoke.

"They found nothing and are transferring the investigation."

Edward tensed but I remained frozen. Transfer the investigation to where?

"So where are they moving it to?" Edward said through clenched teeth, seeming to know the answer. Charlie shook his head, not wanting to say anything with me in the room. I stood my ground, having every right to know what was going on. The atmosphere in the room grew more tense as Charlie weighed out the options in his head; he could force me to leave the room or tell me outright.

Edward glanced between me and Charlie, clearly debating whether I should be told or not. With a sigh, Charlie started to speak.

"I found out yesterday that…_he_ was meant to be transferred to a team in Seattle," both Edward and I froze, my breathing became shallow and fast. He was near, he would find out I had told someone what had happened, I would be in trouble.

Edward wrapped his arm around me and tried to calm me down. Charlie continued.

"I also tried to research the teams in Seattle, not one had any mention of him."

"Meaning?" Edward whispered.

I buried my head against Edward's chest, not wanting to know anything else and yet begging Charlie to speak.

"He changed his name," he grunted out. The arm around me tightened as I began to lose consciousness. The blackness swirled around my eyes and soon I was pulled under, exposed to all the memories I tried to lock up. Everything flashed through my mind and I fought to wake up. The display of images stopped as I was pulled abruptly back.

"Bella?"

I opened my eyes slowly only to see Edward and Charlie standing over me. Charlie looked relieved once I blinked but Edward still looked worried. I tried getting up but had to hold onto Edward's shoulder once I stumbled and fell back again. He smiled slightly and picked me up, knowing all too well what might happen if I did try to walk now.

He carried me up to my room, placing me on my bed carefully. Sitting on the chair in front of me, he looked anxious, worried, scared, angry and frustrated. His face was holding back showing any emotion but he slipped at times. We were silent for a few moments before I spoke up.

"Do you… do you think that it's true? That he's in Seattle?" I croaked out, my throat felt as though it had been closed up tightly.

He closed his eyes and clenched his jaw. "I'm not sure what to think now," he opened his eyes and looked at me, "all I know is that keeping you safe has become my number one priority."

No-one has even seemed to want to take care of me before. Charlie does radiate a sense of belonging but for someone to say that I was somewhat valuable to them was a definite first. I smiled weakly and my eyes welled up. Edward came and sat down beside me, allowing me to ruin his shirt with my tears. He patiently waited for me to stop, not once moving or seeming uncomfortable.

Hours passed without us moving. I felt stiff from my position and my eyes had dried out but I didn't move, I didn't want to move. Once I finally convinced myself that I had spent enough time being selfish and had to let Edward out of my death grip, I dropped my arms and shuffled away. I smiled a little when I felt Edward's hands drag reluctantly over my body, as if he thought he same thing as me.

The clock read half five and the sky outside confirmed that, even through the thick cover of cloud that constantly blocked out all sunlight. I stared out the window, wondering how close he could be. It wasn't exactly a long way from here, only a few hours drive. I shook my head to stop thinking about him and tried to focus on my life here; I might as well enjoy life here as much as I can while I'm safe.

"You should probably go home, your parents might be worried," I told Edward. He examined my face and smiled slightly.

"Dad told me to stay here as long as you'll have me. I think they enjoy my absence and plus Mom's been desperate to paint my room for months now. With me gone for a day, she's probably picked out the colour and started working," he joked. I did want him to stay but he shouldn't feel that he had to stay with me all the time.

I laughed. "You can stay tonight but tomorrow you have to go back to your own house. It's not fair on you to be here."

He frowned playfully. "I happen to like it here and plus waking up to you is a definite improvement to Emmett. How about a deal? If you have to force me back to my house then I can stay here every other night."

I laughed when he mentioned Emmett, the older-brother figure to all of us who knew him.

"Deal. How is Emmett?" I hadn't seen him yet.

Edward shrugged, moving from the edge of the bed to the wall so he could lean against it.

"It's Emmett. I caught him sneaking back in yesterday morning at about five or something. He enjoys being on the football team too much, it gives him an excuse to crash into people without being reprimanded by Mom."

I smiled, remembering when Emmett tried out for Little League but quit after finding out he couldn't push people over during the games. I had recently found that most of my childhood memories were coming back to me. When I moved, I tried not to think about Forks too much, but now I had hundreds of memories that had now been unlocked in my head. Maybe Forks was helping me improve into a normal human.

The phone rang again downstairs and Charlie could be heard walking down the hall to get it. I glanced around my room and realised I hadn't finished any of my homework. Deciding it would be better to at least complete an assignment late then not hand it in at all, I grabbed my bag and pulled out the first book that came to hand.

"Good idea," Edward muttered getting up to get his bag from behind my door. He settled on the floor while I sat on the bed, spreading all of my work out. It wouldn't take me long, I had less than half of the English paper to finish and some Biology work that Edward could help me with. I tackled the paper first, wanting to get the biggest thing out of the way.

I had about another page to go when Charlie knocked on the door. He cracked it open and smiled at the sight of the two if us doing our work.

"Hey. I just need to check something out on your computer, Bells."

I nodded and jumped off the bed, reaching over to the desk to switch on the decrepit machine. It chocked to life, the hard drive whirring and clunking away. Once it had booted up I let Charlie take over.

"What do you need?" I asked, stepping over books to hop back onto my bed.

"I just need to make sure the network's secure," he tried to say it as if I didn't matter but watching him, I knew differently. He navigated the system and eventually found what he was looking for. Taking out a small device from his pocket, he inserted it into the back of the computer. Edward was watching him, finished with a music assignment.

The device opened a new program and Charlie started to download something off of it. I didn't have a clue about computers so I only went by what was showing up on the screen, he could have been launching a space craft for all I knew.

Edward stood and looked over Charlie's shoulder, observing the progress of whatever was downloading.

"Finished," Charlie mumbled, pulling out the device and shutting off my computer. He smiled at me and left the room, shouting over his shoulder as he walked down the stairs. "I'm ordering a pizza in an hour, come down to choose whatever you two want."

Edward sat back down on the ground and waited until I finished my paper before taking out his Biology book. "You want to work on this together?"

**Phil's POV**

I paid the delivery guy once he came in through the door. The computer would be waiting in the box to be turned on, no time would be wasted installing and downloading software, it would all be loaded and ready.

Plugging it into the wall, I shrugged off my stiff suit jacket from work and lit up one of the joints I had left over from an old delivery.

It was a pretty sophisticated system, modern design with high speed drives. The high definition monitor would come in handy for pictures and photos I received by email. I switched it on, the screen flashing quickly before the loading bar appeared. Within seconds, everything was ready; all I had to do was press a few buttons.

The hacker system connected to the network, security systems checking it was safe to go on. I bypassed all password guarded systems and soon had access to almost all computers in the state of Washington. I found the girl's computer after ten minutes.

I cursed to myself when the box appeared telling me it was guarded by protection software, the type issued to police stations. Willing to take a chance, I proceeded to try to get into it.

The screen showed my computer bypassing the protection software with ease. The idiot had forgot to put a password on it. Now I had access to her computer, to any of her files, to any of her emails; this was too easy.

If she had a school trip, I'd probably see an email for it. If she had any friends, I would see her messaging them. It was as good as being in the room with her.

**A/N: Over 1,800 hits! There are over 43 of you reading this (43 on alert plus whoever stops by) so could we try to hit 80 reviews this time?**

**I know I'm asking for reviews every chapter but there are a load of you who haven't even said one word about this story, and like everything else I have written, when less than half the people reading review, I feel my story isn't good and then get really worried about it.**

**I know some of you who have read my other stories know I have said this about then too but I honestly do become worried when less then half of you review.**


	9. Planning by Alice

**A/N: One important thing to say (well two really): Yes Phil is creepy, and he will continue to get weirder.**

**The second thing is that you will notice completely different side to Bella once she goes back to school. When she's around Charlie and Edward, her mind connects them to her seven year old memories, therefore she thinks of them in the same way as a seven year old; trusting and slightly naïve. When she goes back to school, she has nothing to connect it with and basically freaks out, hence the reason for appearing so calm in the last chapter.**

**She has barely any social skills or experiences so don't expect everything to run smoothly from now on.**

**Thanks to:**

**lgr42293**

**nicole036**

**lostpoisoned**

**erica.xx**

**Luvntwilight**

**Horsefreak01 (sorry for the mistakes, I was trying to get it up as soon as possible)**

**modernxxmyth**

**TwilightLover15**

**TwilightNerd**

**Sovoyita (lol that's a good theory for his evilness)**

**waterdemon9**

**Xx EdwardLova xX**

**LolaluvsEdward**

**Now for a new school day.**

**Bella Swan**

**Sept 5****th**

I made sure to set my alarm last night after over-sleeping yesterday. The last thing I needed was to miss more school and for everyone else to have time to circulate rumours about my mysterious disappearances.

I had come to a conclusion last night. As much as I hated to admit it, I needed to see a therapist of some sort to help me sort out what the hell was going through my head. I didn't want to appear to be a nutcase to the rest of the world and I didn't want to be a burden on Edward and Charlie.

I hated the idea of therapists. Even the word is bad: therapist, the/rapist. The thought of sitting there while some stranger asks how you feel and what happened to you is off putting. I hoped to get someone who would say 'You're fine' or be an actual human being.

I also had to see a doctor to have a check-up on my old bruises and scars. I had a nasty cut on my back a few years ago and it got infected so the scar is a particularly surprising shade of green. Also I had broken my arm and leg before and had never had a cast on so they would need to be checked out.

Amazed with myself, I wondered where all of this had come from. I had never wanted to see a doctor purely for a check-up. I also had never even considered a therapist. I suppose that maybe the fact I always looked at myself as 'damaged goods' meant that I wanted to repair myself a bit more.

After a few minutes of thinking to myself, the annoyingly generic buzzing of the alarm clock went off. I pulled Edward's arm off me and sat up to turn it off. He stirred but rolled over.

"Wake me up in ten minutes," was all he muttered.

I rolled off the bed and stretched as I stood up, my tiny twin bed was a bit cramped with the two of us in it. Rubbing my shoulder to try and get some feeling back into it, I grabbed my outfit for the day and dragged myself to the bathroom. The shower woke me up but I still dressed in an almost daze-like state.

Edward was still asleep when I went back in to get him up. He ignored my attempts and pulled the sheets over his head when I stood over him. I had a strong feeling he had a great big smirk on his face and was enjoying this too much. Sighing in frustration, I started to walk over to the door, only to take a running leap onto him.

He yelped in shock and sat up, causing me to slip down from my landing place on his chest to his legs. I couldn't help laughing at him, his face was covered by the sheet and he was struggling to free his arms to pull it off. Once it was off, and his face was exposed, a new fit of giggles erupted when I took in the sight of his bed-head and expression.

His hair always had a life of it's own, but this was completely different. It was sticking up on end in most parts, adding about another foot to his already tall height. In other places it was flattened and matted from where he had slept on it. His face was in shock from my actions.

"What the hell was that for?" he demanded.

"Well you left me with no choice," I said through my giggles.

His face went serious for a moment. "Well then you leave me with no other choice than to take out my revenge."

I laughed in his face. "And how would you do that?" I wondered where my confidence had come from.

An evil smirk twisted it's way onto his face.

"As I remember you used to be extremely ticklish." My face paled, how did he remember that? I slowly inched my way down his legs while he leaned over towards me.

"You wouldn't-" I was cut off by him launching himself at me. He knocked me backwards and started to assault my body with his hands. I lost all control and started to writhe around the bed, laughing my head off.

"Please…stop…stop it! You win," I said breathlessly, still trying not to laugh more.

"Sorry? Didn't catch that," he said.

I groaned, "You win, I give up." He smiled and stopped. I tried to sit up but banged my head against his. I didn't realise how close we had been.

"Ow!" we both said. I closed my eyes for a few moments, trying to wait for my breathing to return to normal and for the throbbing to pass. I opened them again only to find a strange expression on Edward's face.

He looked at me… differently, as if I was valuable to him. I couldn't place the emotions or recognise them. It made me feel a bit strange and I was now aware of how close he was to me. I felt awkward and so spoke up.

"Um, are you going to sit on me all day or are you not even thinking about school at all?"

He shook his head a few times and got up quickly, muttering an apology before racing out of the room to get ready. I brushed off his change in attitude and went downstairs to make breakfast.

Due to my habit of waking early, we had loads of time before school started. I turned on the radio and set about collecting the ingredients for pancakes. Edward came down just as I had finished the mixture. He stopped dead when he spotted the clock on the wall.

"Please tell me that's wrong," he pleaded, slumping down onto a chair.

"Nope, it's the right time," I said as I poured some mixture into a greased frying pan. He groaned behind me.

"But we have another forty-five minutes before we even have to_ leave_ for school, and then we will probably be ten minutes early. I'm usually only up ten minutes before class starts." He looked wrecked. I would have felt sorry for him if it wasn't for that fact that he had gone to sleep at the same time as me. How could someone look so bad if they had gotten ten hours of sleep? We didn't even stay up late, we went to bed early.

I shook my head and laughed at him again. Only he could be so dramatic over getting up early.

Finishing the last pancake, I split up the stack between the two plates, giving Edward the one with the significantly larger amount. He stared at me when I put the plate in front of him and sat down.

"What?" I asked as I got the syrup out of the cupboard.

He gestured between his plate with six large pancakes and mine with two small ones.

"So?"

He grabbed the syrup once I was finished and swallowed the large bite he had taken before answering me.

"You have to be hungry, you barely ate half the pizza last night. I ate mine and the rest of yours and I'm starving. There is no way that you can eat that little."

I shrugged, a little uncomfortable by his observations. "I guess I have a small appetite."

He stood up and slid two of his pancakes onto my plate. I tried to argue but he wasn't backing down. "We're not leaving until you finish them. I'm not letting you go to school on an empty stomach."

I shoved most of the pancakes down my throat, I usually didn't eat much anyway. I had a slim figure and didn't need too much food. After eating the pancakes, I didn't feel sickeningly full but not starving either.

After cleaning up we decided to head to school. The mist had settled from last night but a heavy fog threatened to envelope the town.

My truck sat in the driveway from where Alice had dropped it back. I ventured over to it only to have Edward drag me forcefully down to his car. He realised I was as stubborn as him but not as equally matched in strength. I had no choice but to get into the Volvo.

"Remind me again why I am incapable of driving myself to school?" I huffed as I put on the seat belt.

Edward smirked as he started the car, the purr of the engine was virtually silent compared to the roar of the truck. "You're not _incapable_, just a little unsafe on the roads," he laughed when he took in my expression, "and plus what's the point of taking two cars if we are going over to my place later?"

I gawked at him, "Since when were we going to your house?"

He pulled out of my street and onto the highway, "Since Alice and Mom wanted to see you so badly they threatened to take away my car if I didn't bring you over."

I softened up when his face became terrified for the well-being of his car. He must love it more than his own family. The drive was quiet after that, only occasional small-talk popping up. I felt more comfortable today with Edward, and a little more relaxed about going to school. I was a bit apprehensive about going to his house though. I hadn't seen Carlisle or Esme in years and what if they didn't like what I had become? What if they hated me for being a burden on their son and family?

I pushed those thoughts out of my head and opened the door when Edward parked the car. He chuckled and got out as well. "You can't let me be an gentleman for a minute, can you?" He laughed.

I just smiled and started to walk towards the cluster of buildings that was becoming more familiar but also holding a few bad memories because of my last two days in them.

I happily walked with Edward to the double period of Biology, our first class of the day. I still wasn't completely ready to speak to any of the teachers yet. I concluded that Edward, Alice and Charlie were the only people I felt comfortable talking to.

I grew nervous as we walked in the door. Edward sensed this and grabbed my hand, leading me over to our table. I gained a few stares once I came in the door and Edward's gesture did not go unnoticed. Two of the girls sitting a couple of desks up from us gaped at us and starting whispering loudly to each other.

"… _what's he doing holding _her_ hand?"_

"_He can't be with her, he just can't. After all the effort we put into trying to go out with him, she just waltzes in and is holding hands with him on her third day."_

I ducked my head and sat down, trying to become part of the desk by slouching further into the stool. I attempted to slip my hand out of Edward's but he had a firm grasp on it. I took out my notepad and doodled aimlessly, waiting for the class to start.

Edward nudged me with his elbow while we waited, to get my attention. "Are you going to use that today?" he pointed at the notepad.

I nodded, "Just with the teachers and some other people."

He smiled when I spoke and nodded. "You're making progress already."

I laughed and stopped abruptly when Mike Newton stopped dead beside our desk. He gaped at me when I spoke and shook his head before continuing on. Edward gripped the desk tightly with his hands and stared menacingly at Mike's back.

"Still haven't forgiven him yet?" I muttered.

He shook his head, "No and he has been saying some things about you that make him deserve to be punched. Emmett had to be restrained yesterday by Jasper and Tyler when he overheard him."

I frowned. "What had he been saying?"

Edward closed his eyes and shook his head, "You don't need to know."

I nodded slowly and got back to my doodling. I figured I would find out soon enough anyway. If Jasper knew then Alice would know, I could always ask her.

Mr Molina burst into the classroom, brandishing five small plastic containers. He walked up to the front and stood before the class. "Dissection," he announced proudly.

A collective cheer came from the male, and some of the female, population of the class. I groaned. I had tried to dissect a frog before in Phoenix but had passed out halfway through. I made up the credit by writing a five page paper on the lab. I started to write something to Edward on my notepad.

_Do you think he will let me off if I have already done the lab?_

Not two seconds later, he had replied.

_He would let you off. You don't like dissection then?_

_I hate it. Passed out the last time I had to do it. I wrote a paper instead of completing the lab to make up the credit._

Edward had raised his hand just before I had finished the note. I slipped it in between some on my books when Mr Molina walked up to us.

"Yes, Mr Cullen?"

"Bella has done this lab is Phoenix but wrote the paper instead of doing the dissection. Could we sit out on this?"

Mr Molina looked at me. "You feel a bit nauseous when it comes to these kind of things?"

I nodded. He smiled.

"Well, I suggest that the best thing to do is be anywhere but here for this period. These things tend to stink once there opened up," he waved a box to show the dead creature. He motioned for Edward to follow him to the front. I packed up my belongings as Edward collected the hall passes and note.

We walked out of the room, well he walked, I ran. The cool air hit us once we opened the door. I longed to find somewhere dry, and preferably warm, to sit. We walked away from the room to a large building close to the cafeteria. Edward opened the door for me and waved me inside.

The room took up the entire building. It had a few rows of bookshelves but was too small to be called a library. Desks and chairs and old couches were dotted around the place. A teacher sat at one end with his feet on the table, reading a newspaper. A few students sat around the place, reading, chatting or doing work.

"What is this place?" I whispered to Edward.

"It doesn't really have a name. Students come here if they have been excused from class or have a free period."

He walked over to the teacher and handed him the note. The teacher smiled at the two of us.

"Ah Edward, what brings you here?"

"Bella wasn't feeling too well in Biology so Mr Molina excused us from doing the dissection."

The teacher nodded, not even looking at the note or checking our hall passes. "Are you going to be in class later?" he asked Edward

Edward nodded and lead me over to an empty corner, away from most of the other students. We sat down on the battered couch in front of a large table. For about ten minutes, neither of us broke the silence. It wasn't awkward but I had to ask Edward something about earlier.

"What did Mike say about me yesterday?"

He tensed but sighed and began to tell me. "He said that he wanted to make you talk. He said he wanted to make you his. _That's_ the… diluted version, I don't think I could handle repeating the real version."

I nodded numbly, knowing from Edward's expression that Mike had been more vulgar than I had thought. I looked over to the sound of the door opening across from us. Alice and Jasper ran in, dripping wet from the rain that must have started. Alice giggled at something Jasper whispered to her. She spotted us and waved, saying something to Jasper before running to join us.

"Hey Bella," she said excitedly and took a seat across from me and Edward. Edward grunted in her direction and fixed his attention to something a foot above my head. I smiled at her and mumbled a hello. She beamed at me and scowled at her brother.

"What?" he asked.

She shook her head, "Not even any greeting for your own sister, I'm ashamed of you Edward." If it wasn't for the fact I knew how terrifying Alice could be when riled up, I would have laughed at her seriousness.

Edward stuck his tongue out at her like a child and turned away. Jasper joined us and smiled in greeting to me. Alice was bouncing out of her seat, seeming constantly excited, or high on sugar and caffeine.

"So, are you coming over today?" she asked me.

"Yes." Her eyes lit up and Edward stared at her.

"Alice, whatever you are thinking, I strongly oppose it."

She frowned and slumped back against her chair.

"But it's only a sleepover. We could have loads of fun," she turned to me, babbling at high speed, "we could watch movies, order food in, and do my favourite past time ever!"

Edward cocked one eyebrow, "Which is what, exactly?"

Alice shrugged, smiling slightly to herself, "Annoying the hell out of you and Emmett of course."

Edward scowled while Jasper hid a laugh. I still wasn't sure how to respond to Alice's invitation. I would have said no straight away if it wasn't for her determination and enthusiasm for it. I thought about all of the pros and cons, and grudgingly agreed when the pros outweighed the cons.

"Fine, I agree to the torture-, sorry, sleepover."

Jasper and Edward laughed while Alice feigned being hurt. Her expression didn't last long and soon she was on her cell, texting someone.

Edward tried to look at her cell but she kept hiding the screen from him.

"Who are you texting?" he asked after he gave up trying to peek at her text.

"I was texting Mom but not I'm texting the planner."

I almost choked, "I thought this was a sleepover."

Alice looked at me as if I had three heads. "Yes it's a sleepover, but it's a _Cullen_ sleepover and we, especially me and Mom, don't do things halfway. It's all the way or nothing."

I paled, not only was I being dragged to their house but I had to attend a sleepover with the extravagance of a Hollywood party. My week keeps getting better.

**A/N: I know I'm a review pig but it would be so awesome (new favourite word) to get to 100 (or more, I'm not picky ,) by chapter 10.**

**I know I always ask for reviews but it is a bit discouraging to log in and find over 500 new hits to your story but only 13 reviews. I don't care if you write 'good' 'bad' 'crap' or even 'hi', a review is a review.**


	10. The Sleepover

**A/N: Breaking Dawn was so good. For anyone who hasn't finished it yet I won't talk about it, but it definitely had a big twist, in a good way.**

**The Twilight Awards AH Round voting starts around August 14th for anyone who wants to vote (sorry, I will be putting up reminders because I really want to see this story place in the competition).**

**Thanks to:**

**TwilightLover15**

**sovoyita**

**bloodredeclipse**

**TwilightNerd**

**jono14**

**Luvntwilight**

**lgr42293**

**thefatlady44**

**tiny31792**

**ericca.xx**

**nicole036**

**waterdemon9**

**OnceUponATime170**

**ShatteredLoveBrokenDreams**

**Xx EdwardLova xX**

**HermioneLF**

**Horsefreak01**

**It's really encouraging to me that every time I write out the list I find that loads of the same people review constantly and others are being added everyday. I know, sappy, but this is the first out of my three stories that receives regular reviews.**

And if **The Twilight Awards** is reading this, I think I may have broken my chair from bouncing up and down in excitement after reading the review.

**Now to the sleepover and Bella's torture (and a bit of fun with Emmett, sorry couldn't resist putting him in)**

**Sept 5th**

**Edward Cullen**

I had to laugh at Bella's comeback. She had gotten more comfortable with both Alice and myself. I think that she had either become comfortable with Jasper as well or forgotten he was there because of his quietness.

We all settled into chatting and catching up with work together quickly. The room was quiet but had the ever present hum of chatter that was created by the small amount of students here. I always enjoyed coming here during free periods or when I could be excused from class.

Mr Fega, (an: lol a friend's teacher who once had to drive the class up to a play on a bus and ended up running out of gas halfway and decided to amuse all thirty of his students by repeatedly running across the busy road until he got cautioned by a policeman) my music teacher, was always supervising here. That was mainly due to his laid-back attitude; he hated the faculty lounge. Also, he had lots of free periods because of the lack of students taking music. My class of nine and a freshman class of seven were the only students he taught.

If any other teacher was supervising here, most students would try and go off campus for their free periods.

I looked around at my friends and sister once I had finished some extra-credit Government work. Jasper was reading a Civil War novel but his interest was obviously captured by Alice as he glanced over to her every time he turned a page.

Alice was engrossed by a fashion magazine. She turned the pages with reverence, as if the next had something more intriguing and she also wanted to save it for future use. I was a bit worried for Bella by Alice's stares at her. She seemed to mentally picture Bella in every dress and outfit on the glossy pages.

Bella simply stared around her. She didn't appear bored or uncomfortable. I couldn't help but remember earlier this morning when I tickled her.

Sometimes Bella did certain things or had certain expressions that were exactly the same as her seven year old self; the way she scrunched her eyes when she laughed, the way she tucked her hair behind her ear when she was about to do something that required her full attention. They were small details but had remained exactly the same even though she had grown up.

Other times, she did things that reminded me that she _had_ grown up. I couldn't help but feel attracted to her. She was beautiful, intelligent, funny. When I had been tickling her this morning, she smiled after she had surrendered and it blew me away, very clichéd but true.

She was also vulnerable, afraid, and in danger, and I wanted to be there for her. I wanted to protect her, to comfort her. Charlie had told me that the only time she slept soundly, without the use of medication, was when I stayed over. He had noticed her changing and asked me to help continue it.

"Earth to Edward, come in idiot."

I jumped when Alice threw her magazine at me. Glaring at her, I passed it to Jasper. "What?"

She grinned at me and took the magazine back, her face falling as she looked at it.

"What's wrong now?" I asked.

She held up the now crinkled pages and mouthed wordlessly before regaining her voice.

"Look at what you did!"

I frowned. "You threw it at me."

She sighed and passed it back to Jasper, giving him her infamous 'my puppy got run over' eyes. He grabbed the magazine and began smoothing out the pages as if it was about to die. She had him whipped and she knew it.

"Well if you hadn't been staring at Bella for ten minutes I wouldn't have to get your attention by using projectiles," she snapped.

I inwardly groaned. Bella was a slight shade of pink so she must had noticed my staring or been alerted to it by Alice. Why did I have to be so obvious?

"What did you want Alice?"

She took back her now-fixed magazine from Jasper and gave him and smile before scowling at me again.

"Well I was saying that you should take Bella home after school, help her get her things and then bring her back to our house at about five. That would give me enough time to set everything up since Mom agreed to help out with whatever is being delivered before then."

I nodded, that was fine by me. I had an hour of time with Bella without my sister before being thrown back into the mad-house. Emmett was going to be annoying since Rosalie was going to a car show in Port Angeles tonight and he wasn't allowed to go. One major accident and you're banned from those things for a year.

Bella shuffled in her seat, staring at the floor. I wanted to know what was bothering her badly. I couldn't exactly just ask her outright in front of Alice and Jasper.

Minutes later, the bell rang, signalling the end of first period. Mike Newton, to my immediate annoyance, ran in through the door towards us, still in his white lab coat. Alice and Jasper left quickly, rushing to whatever class they had next.

"Hey Bella, Edward," Mike said, "Mr Molina said that you two should stay here for this period as well. Jessica got a bit over excited and ended up making the thing explode. The whole lab is like covered in-"

"That's fine, Mike. Bye," I said curtly, wanting him to leave and stop before Bella turns a darker shade of green.

He smiled weakly at Bella, staring at her for much too long, and left. I scowled at his retreating form and tried to rid my head of the images of Mike in pain.

I heard Bella laugh weakly and turned to look at her. Her brown eyes were still dead, they hadn't lit up at all since she returned. She smiled at me weakly and dumped her bag on the floor from it's place on her lap.

"It's a good thing we didn't go back to class early," she explained.

I smiled back at her and settled back into my chair. Mr Fega had covered his desk in manuscript pages and was playing a song on an imaginary guitar like he always does. The rain had returned and was heavier then before. It hit the roof above in pelts and caused the now lower hum of chatter to drown in it's symphony of sound.

Bella took a deep breath and turned to me. "Edward there's something I need to talk to you about."

**Bella Swan**

I gathered up my courage and got his attention. I couldn't believe I was going to talk to him about this. I had already planned not to include Charlie or Edward with this but I was doing strange things lately and there seemed to be nothing I could do to stop them happening.

He gave me his full attention, turning in his seat to face me. I took another deep breath and continued.

"I thought about this before and I want to do this to help myself get back to normal," he nodded slowly and let me continue, "I want to see a counsellor." I let the last bit out in one quick breath.

I braced myself for his reaction. Was he angry? Did he think I was weak? I shouldn't have said anything. I shouldn't have _come_ here.

Instead of being angry, he smiled and nodded. I let out the breath I was holding in and tried to calm my racing heartbeat.

"Have you thought about what kind of counsellor you want to see?" he asked.

I frowned. What type? Aren't they all generic, 'now tell me what happened?', robots? Edward noticed my confusion and smiled again.

"What I mean is that you could go to one-on-one sessions or group therapy or something like that. There are different types of counsellors for each type but you would have to pick either private counselling or group sessions," he explained.

Without thinking too much about it, I blurted out "one-on-one". There was no way I was going to be able to sit in front of a group of strangers and tell them about myself.

Edward seemed to know a lot about this. I couldn't help but look at him curiously, could he have already thought about this?

His echoing chuckle bounced around the room, "Sorry, you probably have no idea how I know all of this. Dad took a couple of years off from working at the hospital when we were younger to become a counsellor so as he didn't have to work long hours. He took psychology when he was in medical school," he leaned towards me and became a bit more serious. "If you want I could ask him to help you. It might be easier for you because you knew him before."

I bit my lip in thought. It definitely would be easier because it was Carlisle but I wasn't too sure. What if Carlisle didn't like me? What if he didn't believe me? What if he thought I was a 'hopeless case'? I knew I always questioned every decision I made but it was better to weigh out both sides before choosing a path that might lead to something bad.

Edward's face made up my mind for me. From his eyes I could tell he wanted me to speak to Carlisle. I nodded and watched as he grinned.

"I'll talk to him later and then we can work out days that he can see you."

The period passed quickly after that. My classes with Edward ended once Biology was up and we parted to our separate classes. I headed to English with Alice while he went to History with Jasper.

I was on the receiving end of a lot of stares. I ignored them as much as I could. In the classes where I didn't have anyone I was comfortable talking to, everyone avoided me and thought I was creepy. It suited me fine; they stayed away from me and I stayed away from them.

I continued to use my notepad with all of the teachers. In some classes where the teacher was remotely humane, I nodded or gestured to answer. What can I say, if they treated me with respect I should at least try to respect them too.

I didn't communicate with any of the other students. I had two other classes with Mike Newton. When he seen me he went smug before whispering something in his friend's ear. I avoided him like the plague.

I met, well, seen, Rosalie in one of my classes. She didn't introduce herself to me and I assumed she was just a snob. She was a typical blond head-cheerleader; tall and extremely beautiful. It wasn't until I met her and Emmett at lunch that I learned she didn't want to introduce herself because she wasn't sure if I was comfortable with being approached by other people. She turned out to be nice, if a little overly self-confident.

Emmett hadn't changed one bit. He bounded up to me and Edward when we walked into lunch together and had to be restrained from hugging me by Jasper. His voice had deepened from the high pitched squeak to a deep boom. It suited his frame. When he was younger he was short and had a little roundness to him. Now he was almost as tall as Edward and muscled to almost the extremes of a bodybuilder. His eyes and hair were the only things that hadn't changed at all.

The day had passed and now I was sitting in Edward's car on the way back to my house. We planned to get my stuff ready, do as much homework as possible and then head back to the sleepover. Alice called us twice on the way to remind us about the time. It wasn't until Edward called his mom to ask her to retrain Alice that his cell stopped ringing five minutes.

I was surprised by the change in weather. It had gone from heavy rain to light cloud in a few hours. From what I could remember, this was a rare occurrence in one of the rainiest places in the Continental US.

I quickly made dinner, placing a filled plate into the fridge for Charlie to eat later. My bag was packed and ready by the door as we started our homework. Thankfully we both had been excused from catching up on the work we missed since it was the beginning of the year.

Working in silence, we both finished within half an hour. I was impressed with Edward's intelligence. Most of the students here seemed to be on the same level as toddlers when it came to academic work. I had always known that because of my extra time spent working on my grades, I had surpassed quite a few of the people in my classes back in Phoenix. It wasn't until I had come here that I realised how much my grades had improved. My paper that I handed in today in English was graded quickly and received an A+. My Biology work that was handed back to me by Edward received an A+ also. I hadn't even worked hard on the work.

I didn't want to appear to be a nerd or geek. I spent the bare minimum on my work but that always gave me high grades.

When the time came for us to leave, my panic levels rose again. I still hadn't calmed down. I was anxious about meeting Carlisle and Esme again and if they would hate me or not.

Charlie arrived just as we were leaving.

"Hey Bells. Going to the sleepover?"

He grinned at the two of us. I nodded and walked over to Edward's car, saying a goodbye to Charlie over my shoulder. I could hear Charlie's laughter from the front door. "Don't be too nervous Bella, they won't bite you," he joked.

I grimaced at him and got into the Volvo, Edward closing my door for me as I put on my seat-belt.

"You don't have to be so nervous, you know. Mom's been dying to see you," he must have noticed my obvious anxiousness. He smiled, "Imagine a grown-up Alice and you have her an idea of her enthusiasm."

I smiled weakly. From what he said, Esme mustn't have changed much.

After driving out of the town, we came up to the familiar driveway. Even the crunch of gravel under the tires hadn't changed in ten years. The trees that lined the driveway had grown and now loomed over the car creating an impressive canopy above.

Edward sped down the driveway at an unreasonable speed. He seemed to enjoy the rush.

The trees fell away and suddenly we were greeted by the great mansion of a house. A large glass structure jutted out of the side that hadn't been there ten years ago and a large garage beside the house was also new.

"We built the pool on about five years ago," Edward pointed out the glass room, "and we built the garage three years ago when Dad realised that with us getting our licenses, we would need something to hold all of our cars."

He pulled the car up to the garage door and pressed something on the roof of the car to open the door. What I wasn't prepared for what was inside the garage. It was a large space and I knew the Cullen's were incredibly rich, but it was _filled_ with some of the most expensive looking cars I have ever seen. The Volvo looked like my truck's cousin in comparison to some of the vehicles in here.

A monstrous Jeep stood at one end of the garage, I guessed it must belong to Emmett because it radiated his personality.

A Mercedes sat beside the Jeep, the chrome writing at the back told me it was a 'McLaren SLR', whatever that was. All I knew was that it probably cost more than my house.

Expensive cars lined the garage, about ten in total including the Volvo. I could only pick out a canary yellow Porsche 911 Turbo because Charlie had spent a whole summer going on about it once, and a black Aston Martin. I stared openly at the Aston Martin, it stood out in the garage. Edward chuckled beside me as he parked swiftly in an empty space in the middle of the garage.

"I see you like my Vanquish."

I stared at him, "_That's_ your's?

He nodded at me and laughed, "My occasions car."

I couldn't help gaping still. "But why do you drive the Volvo if you have that?" I asked as we got out of the car.

Edward shrugged as we walked to a door to the side of the garage, he swung my bag onto his shoulder, refusing to let me carry it.

"I love that car but I also want to blend in. When I drive the Vanquish, everyone stares," he said simply. I knew what he meant.

We walked into the house and were greeted by an explosion of pink.

"Alice," Edward muttered beside me.

A hallway connected the house to the garage and it was decorated with pink and silver streamers. I was terrified to brush against them for the fear of coating myself in glitter, or being strangled to a pink and cheerful death. It was times like this when I wished everyone had maintained the black, Goth phase we all passed though a few years ago.

When Edward opened the door at the top of the hallway, we were greeted by a more pink. I wanted to turn back and hole myself up in the dark garage.

Shrieks echoed from behind the barely opened door. Once it was fully opened, Alice bounded through and pulled Edward forward quite forcefully, in turn pulling me with him since I had grabbed his hand to keep me from being swallowed in the pink hall.

"You're here! Mom!" Alice screamed, pulling us once again. She managed to get us from the kitchen to the sitting room in a matter of seconds.

Every room had remained remotely the same. Some of the walls had been painted and some of the furniture replaced but it only differed from my seven year old memories slightly. The kitchen had changed the most with brand new appliances and cupboards.

Esme and Carlisle stood in the living room. They hadn't changed at all. Carlisle was still the tall, handsome man that I remember seeing way too much of because of my regular trips to the emergency room. Esme was still a timeless beauty. Both of them came to greet us.

"Bella! I am so glad to see you again," Esme smiled down at me and seemed to long to hug me. I was relieved that she refrained from doing so because I still didn't know if I was able to handle it.

Carlisle smiled and nodded at me, "Good to see you Bella."

Alice bounced beside us, "Come on, you have to see what we have set up for tonight."

I was afraid to. Edward tightened his grip on my hand once he sensed my despair. We were led upstairs to Alice's room. I could pick out all of the rooms on this hallway. Loud booming noises came from Emmett's room.

Alice stared at the door with her hands on her hips. Her glare could have melted the wood.

"Emmett!"

Nothing happened, The door stayed shut and the booming continued. I now realised the booming noises was hip-hop music. Alice huffed and flung open the door. Edward and I looked carefully into the room.

Emmett stood in the middle of the room, eyes closed, with sound-proofing headphones in his ears. He was bouncing around in circles, bopping his head to whatever tune was playing on his mp3 player. Alice stomped over to his massive stereo and stopped the hip-hop music. The music playing through his headphones reached us.

_The seven things I hate about you  
__You're vain  
__Your games  
__You're insecure  
__You love me, you like her  
__You made me laugh, you made me cry, I don't know which side to buy  
__Your friends, they're jerks when you act like them, just know it hurts  
__I wanna be with the one I know  
__And the seventh thing I hate the most that you do  
__You make me love you._

Edward burst into laughter, I joined him. It was probably the most… 'pop-y' song I have ever heard. Alice marched up to Emmett and ripped the headphones out of his ears. His eyes popped open and he stopped bouncing and stared at us.

"What the hell? Ow Alice that hurt."

Alice seemed to go more angry, "So you're the one who stole my Miley Cyrus cd."

She tapped her foot on the carpet while Emmett stood there, embarrassed beyond comprehension. Edward was still trying to compose himself beside me as Emmett though of a reply.

"Um… well Rosie asked my to get more in touch with my, eh, feminine side and it was either listen to your cd or get a manicure."

His comment brought on a new round of giggles out of both me and Edward. Alice launched herself at Emmett and clamped onto his back, repeatedly hitting him hard on his back and head. He shouted and yelled at her.

"Come on," Edward muttered to me, still chuckling, and pulled me out of the room and over to his room.

I was glad to be away from all of the pink. Edward's room had been painted a dark gold, with a plush gold carpet and hanging fabric on some walls. A large cd display took up most of one wall and the only other furniture apart from the huge bed was a large leather couch and desk with a chair.

Edward shut his door to drown out his siblings argument and flopped onto his bed, letting his laughter run itself out. Everything went unusually quiet and then the silence was interrupted by Emmett.

"No! Not the pink! I will take anything but the pink! Coral, peach, lavender. Anything but the pink!"

Edward rolled off the bed in laughter and opened his door, revealing Emmett running up and down the hall, away from Alice who was brandishing a selection of nail varnishes.

"If you want a manicure, it's pink or nothing," she yelled at him as she marched him back down to her room.

Unfortunately she spotted us and stopped a the open door. An innocent grin came onto her face but her eyes showed her evil intentions.

"Sleepover time Bella!"

Hours of torture later, Esme finally told Alice to let go of me and for us to get some sleep. I still couldn't believe everything that Alice had planned; sleeping bags and pizza seemed mediocre in comparison to what she had achieved.

I settled into the large, pink, double bed in Alice's room and waited for sleep to come. Just as it crept up to me, it was yanked away by disturbing images and memories. Being in a strange room did not help me to calm down it just made me more afraid when I opened my eyes and wondered where I was. After two hours of tossing and turning, I was officially freaked out. My body was shaking and I was on the verge of a panic attack.

I got out of the bed silently, trying not to wake up Alice, and used the moonlight streaming in through the window to guide me to the door. Once out in the hallway, I walked over to the door and hesitated; should I knock or not? Biting my lip, I knocked softly. There was no answer.

After a minute, I opened the door slowly. Edward sat up the bed and looked over at me.

"Bella? What's wrong?"

He pulled back the sheet and was about to get out of the bed when I walked in and closed the door behind me.

"Could I stay with you? I couldn't sleep," I whispered shakily.

He nodded and let me slip under the sheet. I calmed down instantly once he snaked his arm around my waist and within moments I was asleep.

**A/N: Another chapter done. The 100 review mark had been reached! Think we can keep up the record of 16 reviews for the last chapter or completely demolish it? I'm not picky lol ,**

**Notice how my chapters are getting longer? Sorry I'm proud of myself right now for writing more. Woo! 4434 words!!**

**Haha, I had to make Emmett listen to that song. For those that want to know it's '7 Things' by Miley Cyrus and probably the most girly song I could think of Emmett singing that wasn't 'Barbie Girl' or a Disney soundtrack.**


	11. Wakeup Calls and Admitted Dazzling

**A/N: I'm writing this in a very hyper mood, I'm after finding out that Fall Out Boy are coming to Dublin in October.**

**As always, a reminder that on August 14th, head over to twilightawards(dot)this-paradise(dot)com to vote.**

**Thanks to:**

**RAWR.cookie.**

**modernxxmyth**

**Tennie-chan**

**bloodredeclipse**

**Amy**

**TwilightNerd**

**ericca.xx**

**babygirl71**

**nicole036**

**Shining Eclipse (looking for a beta now)**

**lgr42293**

**Now for the next morning, and did Bella think she could escape Alice without a fight?**

* * *

**Sept 6th**

**Bella Swan**

* * *

I couldn't breathe.

No matter what I tried to do, the unknown crept further towards me.

I could hear his voice, booming above everything else; the screams, the moans, the pain.

I twisted away from his presence and felt something warm and comforting.

The heat wrapped itself around me, protecting me from my fears and making me feel safe.

"Bella…"

I tried to get closer to the heat. The cold blackness started to fade.

"Bella?"

I was being shaken softly, causing my eyes to pop open. At first I thought I had been smothered by fabric but then I realised that the fabric was warm, had a heartbeat and was breathing.

"Bella? Are you alright?" Edward voice came from above the fabric. I pulled away and realised that I had been pressed against his chest. He loosened his arms and let me move my face away.

My breathing had been erratic and my heartbeat was racing. After a few deep breaths, I finally spoke.

"I'm fine, just a bad dream."

Edward's eyes searched mine. He smiled when he found whatever he was looking for. He tightened his arms again and I happily pulled myself closer.

We lay silently together for a few minutes. I heard the door creak open but didn't move, feigning sleep. Someone moved across the room to the foot of the bed. Giggling came from whoever came in.

"Aw, so cute," Alice whispered. There was a click and a flash of a camera. Edward lifted his head.

"What do you want?" he asked, annoyed. The bottom of the bed sank slightly as Alice sat down.

I decided that pretending to be asleep was not a good idea with Alice around and sat up with difficulty considering Edward's strength.

"Good, you're up," Alice chirped. She was dressed in a hot pink, fluffy robe.

A banging noise came from down the hall.

"OW!" Emmett shouted.

Alice laughed. Edward looked at the door with a frown, "Doesn't it sound like he's in your room?"

Her face dropped. Right on cue, music erupted from her room.

_It took too long, it took too long  
__It took too long for you to call back  
__And normally I would just forget that  
__Except for the fact it was my birthday  
__My stupid birthday_

_I played along, I played along  
__I played along, it rolled off my back  
__But obviously my armour was cracked  
__What kind of a boyfriend would forget that?  
__Who would forget that?_

"EMMETT!" Alice shrieked, marching out of Edward's room.

Emmett had started attempting to sing the song, badly, and didn't know most of the lyrics, so he improvised.

_I'm the type of guy who doesn't see  
__What I owned until it pees  
__Don't let Mom know  
__So cut the crap I know I'm lost  
__Find the dog or pay the cost  
__Soon Dad will know_

_It's not poopin' 'till it's poopin'  
__Poopin' with me_

Edward slumped against the pillows, laughing hard. The sound of Alice running into her room could be heard through the closed door. After a few moments, screaming could be heard.

"But I need to listen to your music for Rosie."

"I don't care! You already stole one album and now you are sneaking into my room and murdering Aly & AJ?!"

"How can I murder them if I don't know them?"

Edward starting laughing harder. He turned himself onto his stomach and buried his head in the pillows, trying to muffle his laughter. I giggled at his hair. It was standing up on end and looked like some bronze hedgehog was clinging to his face.

He turned around to face me. "Welcome to Cullen Family Morning Wake-ups. Emmett is our star performer and Alice is lead screamer. Mom's the referee and Dad's the on-site doctor," he chuckled.

I laughed, "So what are you then?"

He shrugged, "Either the lead grouch or the musical supervisor."

"Lead grouch?" I asked.

"I'm the last one up everyday and the first to complain about either my lack of caffeine or my lack of sleep," he smiled, "And speaking of which, we should get up before Emmett devours the kitchen, or sets it on fire." He said the last part with such seriousness that I didn't doubt the possibility of that happening.

He pulled back the sheets and climbed out of the bed. I was a little reluctant to leave the comfort of the warm bed for the bedlam that now pursued the halls. My stomach growled loudly and with a sigh, I untangled the sheets and stood up.

A loud groan came from the closet. I walked over to see Edward standing in front of a mirror, pulling at his hair in vain.

"It's not going to behave if you keep pulling at it," I laughed. He looked at me exasperated and pulled a sweatshirt off the floor.

"It never behaves anyway, might as well try everything I can to control it," he muttered as he pulled on the sweatshirt.

I laughed. "Why do you want to control it? It goes really well with the whole 'Edward Cullen: Dazzling without effort'."

I slapped my hand over my mouth. _Why the hell did I just say that?_

Edward was silent. I risked a glance at him and noticed his smirk.

"'Dazzling'? And might I ask if I dazzle you?"

I pushed forward to the door, hoping to avoid answering his question.

Does he dazzle me? I wasn't too sure how to answer that myself. I mean, of course he is ridiculously handsome, and nice, and sweet, and… Oh crap, he does dazzle me. I mentally slapped myself for even bringing up the subject.

An arm flashed out in front of me and blocked my way to the door. Edward stood in front of me, crossing his arms across his chest.

"I'm not letting you go until you answer my question," he said, a large lopsided grin on his face.

I dropped my gaze after realising I was not going to win this fight.

"Occasionally," I mumbled, trying to push past him. He didn't budge.

"Is that an 'once a month' occasionally or a 'quite frequently' occasionally?" he asked, his voice now a bit softer and less smug.

I looked up at him and smirked. "I believe the rules you set up were that I had to answer your first question to pass. You never included a second question in those rules."

He nodded, his grin growing larger. "Good point."

He moved to let me pass. I walked briskly out of the door, heading for the stairs. I had barely gotten four feet when my legs were knocked from under me.

"Hey!"

Edward picked me up, ignoring my trashing, and started to carry my downstairs.

"What are you doing?!"

He chuckled. "I'll put you down… if you answer my second question."

"And if I chose not to?" I huffed.

His already too big smirk grew larger. "Then I carry you throughout the house and I know that the answer is more embarrassing than this," he gestured to me being in his arms.

I groaned and hid my face against his sweatshirt. If I did answer then he would know but if I didn't answer then he would know _and_ get to carry me around.

"'Quite frequently'. Are you happy now?"

He stopped and gently placed me on the floor at the bottom of the stairs. I nearly ran into the kitchen to avoid another incident.

Esme was standing at the counter, pouring what looked to be pancake mixture into a frying pan.

"Hello, dear. Do you want some breakfast?"

I sat opposite Emmett at the table. "Yes please," I murmured weakly.

Emmett was wolfing eggs and bacon into his mouth but paused his fork once he heard me talking. The large pile of bacon and fried eggs hit the ground with a wet 'splat'.

"Emmett!" Esme scolded him.

He stared at me with an open mouth before finally speaking. "I thought you couldn't talk to anyone but Edward and Alice."

A bread roll was launched at Emmett's head from behind us. I looked over to see Edward glaring at Emmett.

Emmett continued to eat, rubbing crumbs off his forehead. "What?" he said though a monstrous mouthful of food, "I know that she _can_ talk from the screaming she was doing earlier but we weren't expecting her to talk to any of us for a while."

He turned to me, "So does this mean you're a miracle person or something?"

Esme and Edward both jumped for the tray of bread rolls and chucked them at Emmett.

"Unbelievable, you'd think he was raised by dogs." Esme muttered.

"If you guys are finished throwing bread at my face, I have a double date. Me and Eggs with Bacon are going to watch the television." He got up from the table and slouched out of the room.

Esme placed a large plate of food in front of me and sighed. "At least he didn't cause any structural damage today, I'd hate for you to see what could happen when he's at his worst, dear."

I smiled at her in thanks and started to dig into the food. Edward sat beside me but was silent while we ate.

Alice came bouncing into the room when we were almost finished eating. She was fully dressed and had her hair and make-up done as well.

"Good, you're almost done. So what's the plan for today?"

"School. It's a Friday in case you've forgotten," Edward said.

Alice hopped onto a stool at the counter and spun to face us. "Since when has school ever stopped us from doing things? I seem to remember you driving out to Seattle last year to get some cd when it came out on a Tuesday."

"It was a class field trip, we went to his concert afterwards," Edward shot back.

"What class takes a field trip to a music store?"

"A music class. I have Mr Fega, remember?"

For once in her life, Alice Cullen was forced to stay quiet. Her ammo had been demolished and she had no other excuse.

"I'll make a deal with you," she chirped. "We take the day off. I get Bella for an hour to finish off last night's makeover and then you get her for the rest of the day."

"As tempting as that is I don't think Bella would appreciate being put through torture again."

I silently thanked Edward.

"Ah, but I didn't say what your bonus gift was," Alice was grinning like a Cheshire Cat.

Edward stared at her until she continued.

"Us gone for the whole day." She sat back and smiled as Edward thought about her offer.

He seriously did seem like he was contemplating it. "How are you going to get Emmett out of the house?"

"Easy," she smiled. "Hey Emmett? You want to go visit Rose at the car show in Port Angeles today?"

Loud thumping noises alerted us to Emmett's arrival.

"Give me ten minutes to get dressed."

He ran up the stairs and slammed his door. Alice laughed. I backed away from her approaching form, sending Edward pleading looks.

"Believe me," he muttered, "A day without them is worth an hour of torture."

I grudgingly surrendered to the pixie and was marched upstairs to my impending doom.

**(A/N: Was going to leave it there but then decided to give you guys more. Now you better review this chapter because I wasn't even going to allow this to happen for another couple of chapters)**

* * *

An hour of torture did not seem worth the deal made by Alice and Edward.

I was almost finished but had the worst part yet to come.

Alice had pushed me into her shower, styled my hair, applied make-up even though I didn't own a tube of lip-gloss, and now had me in her closet.

"No. I have my own clothes. I will not wear any of these."

Alice stomped her foot.

"Bella, you _will_ wear these. Your own clothes are probably as baggy and non-flattering as Emmett's gym outfit."

I noticed that I had fifteen minutes left. I could argue with her for that long and escape her torture. I had already planned to run into the nearest bathroom once her torture time was up and wash the make-up off my face and pull my hair into a ponytail.

"Oh no, I know that you are planning to go and destroy my work but you won't be able to. You see, you are going downstairs with me before I leave and showing Edward how you could look if you spent more than five minutes on your look. We can do this in the robe," she gestured to the pink fluffy thing she made me wear, "or we could do this in these."

She handed me a blue wrap top and dark jeans, both of which still had tags on. How she had managed to guess my size was beyond me.

I grabbed them and went into the bathroom, knowing that I could never win a fight against Alice.

Thankfully the outfit wasn't as bad as some of the other things she had shown me earlier. This I could do, sequins and glitter; no way in hell.

I tried to avoid my face in the mirror and looked at the outfit. Surprisingly, it looked good on me.

I opened the door and faced Alice again. She beamed when she took in how I looked.

"Good, now come on."

I was led out of her room and into the sitting room downstairs. She chucked a pair of blue flats at me as we were walking down. I looked at the designer when we reached the bottom.

"Manolo Blahnik?"

Alice spun. "You don't know anything about Blahniks?"

I shook my head. The name sounded like a dessert.

Alice started hyperventilating. "You don't know about Manolo Blahniks?"

"Alice are you ready?" Thankfully Emmett's impatience interrupted Alice's shoe-fit. I had a strong feeling that a lesson in designers was in my near future.

She sent me a look to confirm my suspicions and walked into the sitting room. I put on the shoes and followed her in.

Edward and Emmett were sitting on the large L-shaped couch watching the results of last night's game. Emmett turned to greet us.

"Woah! Alice what did you do to Bella?"

Edward spun around and gaped when he seen me. I blushed and looked down. "I told you I looked stupid," I muttered to Alice.

She shrugged at Emmett and sent a glare to me. "You can put your eyes back in now Edward."

I glanced up to see Edward blushing and shaking his head as if to clear it. Emmett burst into laughter at Alice's comment. "She had you there little bro, your jaw was almost touching the carpet."

I sat down beside Edward, still avoiding looking at anyone.

"Well, come on Emmett."

Emmett jumped up and was out of the door in seconds, yelling a goodbye from the hall to the garage. Alice followed him after silently communicating with Edward. The two of them seemed to be telepathic, they both had a wordless conversation with each other.

Once Alice left, an awkward silence fell. I nervously started fidgeting with the tie on my top. Edward cleared his throat.

"You look nice," he said.

I inwardly groaned. "No I don't, I look stupid."

"You don't look stupid, you never look stupid."

I looked at him. "This is me we're talking about."

He stared me down. "Exactly, you never look stupid."

I slumped against the couch. "Well I feel stupid in this outfit."

Edward grabbed my chin and forced me to look at him.

"You don't look stupid in that outfit, you look beautiful. In fact you always look beautiful. Why do you doubt yourself so much?"

I shrugged. "I don't doubt myself, everything I think about myself is true."

Edward sighed. "What do you think about yourself Bella? Because from where I'm sitting I see a beautiful young woman whose smart, kind, loyal and funny. I could go on but the list may take up a few hours."

My blush crept back. Edward's hand brushed my cheek and I looked up to him. He was closer than before.

"You don't have to doubt yourself at all. You have no idea how jealous most of the girls at school were on your first day."

"Jealous? Of m-me?" I stuttered.

He nodded, brushing the hair that was covering my face behind my shoulder.

"But why would they be jealous of me?" I asked.

Something crossed Edward's face, his eyes had changed. I hadn't noticed it before but now I could see that they were darker.

"Because you're everything that they aren't. Most of them try so hard to fake beauty. You show up in a t-shirt and jeans and you're already ten times more beautiful," he joked.

I was beginning to feel strange. My stomach felt lighter and I had a sudden urge to lean closer to Edward. He was only less than a foot away but it felt too distant. Part of me screamed to reach over to him but my mind was still trying to understand what he was saying.

"Yeah the freaky new girl is beautiful," I joked, "Most of them can't stand to be around me."

Edward let out a frustrated sigh.

"Bella you have no idea. Do you know that you already have ten offers to the next dance lined up? Do you remember what I was telling you about Newton? Do you know that most of the guys in our class want to be with you?"

He sounded angry as he was talking. I frowned.

"Why are you so… upset about all of that?" I asked quietly.

Edward closed his eyes. He opened them again and forced me to look at him fully.

"Because I like you Bella."

He leaned towards me and closed his eyes. I froze, my body screaming in joy for what was about to happen…

* * *

**A/N: Little cliffy there lol. Shorter chapter but I'm wrecked right now. I want to point out that this is unedited because I want to get it up as quick as possible.**

**Thanks to OnceACullenForeverAVampire (or whatever name you have now) for helping me with Emmett's lyrics.**

* * *

**Right we have over 52 people on alert and about 150 views per chapter, can we try for 20 reviews this time? Please? Just think of Emmett singing… Remember: reviews happy writer and happy writer faster writing**

**Next, I'm looking for a beta. I have a few requirements that, unfortunately, have to be met.**

**Firstly, I have to see your own work. I'm not giving this story to someone whose grammar and spelling are as bad, or worse, than mine. Also I have to see what you're capable of.**

**Secondly, you have to be on almost everyday. I have a very weird writing schedule.**

**Thirdly, you have to put up with my very weird writing schedule. Some days, I can have a full chapter written up in hours. Other days, I might have part of one written up and then finish it another day. Also I don't plan out future plot lines. I think of a broad idea and then go with whatever happens chapter by chapter.**


	12. Reality and Diagnosis

**A/N: Don't forget, 14****th ****August go to twilightawards(dot)this-paradise(dot)com to vote for this story in the Best Angst category. Link is on my profile.**

I felt that after that cliffy, I couldn't leave you hanging for too long. I want to point out that I now have over 60 people on alert and we are barely breaking 14 reviews per chapter.** Remember: reviews equal happy writer and happy writer equals faster updates (and maybe tweaking the story line a bit to fit in your demands, yes I have been demanded for them to kiss and for a few other things to happen).**

We're after getting the tickets to the FOB gig this morning so I'm still hyper… the joy of screaming along with my sister and friend while ignoring my Dad's dancing and attempted singing will be fun to experience.

**I've had two offers for beta services so I have to check both of them out before I make my decision.**

* * *

You may commence lighting torches and gathering pitchforks to murder me and also those who cry easily might need tissues.

Thanks to:

**Shining Eclipse**

**Xx Edward Lova xX**

**kariepaige08**

**lgr42293**

**nicole036**

**sovoyita** (yes actually I have imagined Emmett singing that song but there are way too many stories out there with him singing it, so I had to drop it)

**twilight lover122**

**modernxxmyth**

**Inu-ru831**

**ericca.xx**

**ShatteredLoveBrokenDreams**

**Mgrl818**

Check out The Script 'The Man Who Can't Be Moved' for this chapter. Good song. It goes really well with what Edward is thinking in this chapter. Lol I'm using local talent here, a Dublin band that my sister hates. Link's on my profile.

* * *

**Sept 6****th****- 8th**

**Bella Swan**

* * *

My heart was thundering away in my chest. I closed my eyes and waited anxiously.

Nothing happened.

Blackness swirled around in my brain.

Images slowly began to form.

Phil's face swooped dangerously close to me.

His hand was pulled back and let go.

My mother's muffled screams echoed in my ears.

The images flashed by quickly but I could see each of them clearly.

Every flash pulled me deeper into the numbing pit that haunted me.

* * *

Slowly but surely, I was dragged up from the blackness.

Light began to seep through my eyelids and a beeping noise told me that I was no longer in the Cullen's house.

The beeping slowed.

"She's pulling through. Everyone out."

Voices rang from around the room. I could only make out Carlisle's, the rest were too hazy. A new voice was stronger than the others.

"Carlisle, I'm not leaving her." Edward was in the room, and quite close to me from the clarity of his voice.

The lights were dimmed slightly and I could feel that a group of people had left the room.

"Heart rate is slowly dropping, stats appear normal," a female voice called out. More beeping came from my left.

"Good, she's out of the seizure now. All we have to do is wait for her to come around," Carlisle replied.

Shuffling noises came from my left and I guessed that Carlisle and the other female were checking something. I faintly wondered where I was.

* * *

I had no clue about how quickly time passed. I felt myself dipping in and out of the black hole. When I had some consciousness returned, I could hear Edward and Carlisle talking. When I was sucked under, everything was black and the images threatened to appear.

I was nearly fully conscious when I could hear and understand Carlisle's conversation to Edward.

"From everything that has happened I fear it may be something quite serious," Carlisle muttered.

"Serious?" Edward asked.

The conversation halted there. They rushed around the room and I could sense that they had come closer to me.

"Bella? Can you hear me?" Carlisle asked calmly.

"Bella?" Edward asked frantically.

My eyes felt like they had weights attached to them. I cracked them open and allowed the dim light to filter through my eyelashes.

I could barely make out the shapes of Edward and Carlisle standing beside my bed. Light green wallpaper wrapped around the room. The beeping noise was louder than before. Great, I was in a hospital.

I opened my eyes fully and everything came into focus.

"Bella," Edward sighed. He slumped into a seat beside me and smiled weakly.

"How are you feeling Bella?" Carlisle asked.

I stretched out all of my limbs to check for damage.

"A little stiff but my head feels really weird," I told him, my voice hoarse and quiet.

He nodded and put down a chart that he was looking over. "Could you explain to me how your head feels?"

"I'm not too sure how to describe it… I feel like I can't physically move it but it also feels extremely light even though I can't move it."

Carlisle made some notes and nodded again. "Could you describe what happened when you were unconscious?"

I gulped. Edward watched me intently. I took a deep breath and decided that keeping my mouth shut was not going to help.

"After everything went black, images started appear… I could see and hear him… my mother screaming…" I mumbled.

Carlisle smiled slightly to show that it was okay for my to continue.

"That happened for a while, then… I think I came through. I could hear you talking and the beeping noise. I could make out the light above. But after that I kept slipping in and out, kind of," I explained.

Carlisle made more notes and nodded. "That confirms the change in heart rate, and what I had been suspecting."

Edward stiffened beside me. "What do you think is the problem?"

Carlisle stood beside the bed, he looked at the two of us seriously. Turning his attention to me, he began to speak.

"You suffered from an epileptic seizure, Bella. You have been unconscious for over two days. I have heard from Edward and your father what has happened in your past and my diagnosis is that you are suffering from PTSD," he replied in a calm voice.

"PTSD?" I asked, still shocked from hearing that I had been out for two days.

"Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder," he answered.

I nodded weakly._ This was absolutely brilliant_, I thought sarcastically, _they now have a name for my weirdness._

Edward was still silent. Carlisle stood.

"If you want I can discuss everything that I know about the disorder or we could wait until later," he smiled, "There are quite a few people out there who want to see you."

I continued to nod. "I think I should see everyone first, I don't think I'm up for taking in too much right now."

Carlisle left to get everyone from outside. Charlie and the Cullen's all filed in. I didn't pay much attention to them, barely acknowledging their presence. After all of the emotional outbursts from Esme and Alice, I felt awkward in the situation and wanted to be alone. Edward smiled at me and placed his hand on the bed, I took it quickly.

Minutes passed and after everyone talked themselves out, and I repeated 'I'm fine', the room began to empty. Soon it was just me and Edward left.

I didn't look at him. I couldn't look at anyone in the eye.

He squeezed my hand and I raised my head slowly. My eyes met his for the first time. Without warning, I burst into tears. He reached over and pulled me into his arms. Sobs shook my body. I couldn't tell how long my crying fit lasted or how long we stayed that way, but I was reluctant to move and more reluctant to have to face up to reality later.

* * *

**Sept 8th**

**Edward Cullen**

* * *

No-one could move me from beside Bella.

I couldn't believe that I had been stupid enough to cause this to her.

Once she had started to shake when I tried to kiss her, I freaked out.

Her eyes were spinning rapidly under her eyelids and her body was jerking violently. I had known enough about seizures to know that this was an epileptic fit. I called Dad once I had Bella sitting upright, a spoon in between her teeth to prevent her from biting her tongue. The ambulance came after five excruciatingly slow minutes. I didn't let go of her hand under we got to the hospital and Dad told me that they had to attach her to the monitor.

I barely understood what was going on around me. People passed in a blur, nurses and other doctors ran tests and checked the machines. I sat down and waited.

Mom arrived first with Charlie. Both of them were upset. Dad took Charlie outside and spoke to him for a while. I was questioned next, in my seat beside the bed. He asked me to tell him everything I knew about Bella's past and her previous fits.

That was the last time I spoke until Dad ordered us out of the room. I wasn't leaving Bella's side again.

The heart monitor started to slow, signalling that she was coming out of the fit. I relaxed as we realised she was conscious again. Dad dimmed the lights, he nodded when he caught me eye, confirming my worst fears: he was preparing for a repeat of the seizure.

Bella's breathing returned to normal, every now and then it would speed up and her heart rate would increase. We waited for her to come around.

"Do you think that this could be a regular problem?" I whispered.

Dad stood and asked the female nurse to leave. He returned to his place by the monitors.

"I fear that she may suffer from epilepsy after this but I can't be sure until she comes around. I have to see how she feels before I can confirm anything."

I nodded. "What do you suspect is wrong?" I asked.

"From everything that has happened I fear it may be something quite serious," he muttered.

"Serious?"

A new beeping noise came from the monitors, she was conscious again.

"Bella?" Dad asked, "Can you hear me?"

I jumped up from my seat and restrained myself from grabbing her hand. "Bella?"

Her eyes opened slightly and once she had become accustomed to her surroundings, she opened them fully.

"Bella," I sighed, relieved that she was alright. I sat back down an listened to the two of them talking.

Dad made a few notes as she described how she was feeling. From his eyes I could tell that she was confirming what he thought. I returned my attention to Bella and never let it wander.

"What do you think is the problem?" I asked.

Dad moved to the bed and looked at both of is seriously before answering.

"You suffered from an epileptic seizure, Bella. You have been unconscious for over two days. I have heard from Edward and your father what has happened in your past and my diagnosis is that you are suffering from PTSD," he replied.

I froze. PTSD.

I had known a small bit about the disorder, enough to know the seriousness of it. Although it wasn't life threatening like a cancer, it could still impair life just as badly. It was definitely a plausible diagnosis, with her history of childhood abuse, witnessing of drug and alcohol abuse, and death threats.

I thought over the treatment options. I almost laughed when I remembered that Bella wanted to see a counsellor as that was one of the first treatment options I could remember. But it wasn't the most effective or the most important. From what I could recall, she would need stimuli treatment; including eye sensory therapy.

I was shaken from my thoughts by the loud sobbing noises coming from behind me. Everyone had come back into the room. I ignored them and focused on Bella. She looked as spaced out as I was. Keeping her eyes low, she glanced at me but didn't meet my eyes. I smiled and offered her my hand, ecstatic when she took it eagerly.

Once everyone had left, I squeezed Bella's hand. She looked at me slowly and started to cry. I couldn't stand to see her in any pain. Instinctively, I wrapped my arms around her and stood there, trying to comfort her as much as I possibly could. Her sobs eased up after the best part of an hour but we didn't move.

I pulled back slightly when her breathing became slower. She looked exhausted. I smiled at her and went to sit back down. She held onto my arms and looked at me desperately. I realised what she wanted and got into the bed with her. She buried her head against my chest and was asleep within seconds.

* * *

**Sept 20th**

**Bella Swan**

* * *

I stayed in the hospital for a week. Edward barely left my side. He asked Alice to bring him over some clothes so he could stay with me. I was grateful but I still argued that he should go home.

After I returned home, I was given medication to calm me down and to reduce the risk of more attacks. I wasn't allowed to be in brightly lit rooms, if I went outside I had to wear sunglasses because the epileptic fit still threatened to come back. Loud noises, flashing lights and other unexpected things had to be avoided.

I wasn't allowed to go back to school. Carlisle said I had to rest and not be stressed out. Edward and I decided it was safer for me to stay at the Cullen's house for the first week in case another fit happened. Carlisle was at home for most of the day and their house was closer to the hospital than mine in case of an emergency.

Charlie was reluctant to allow me to stay with the Cullen's. It wasn't until I returned home that I realised why.

"_Goodnight Bells," Charlie said as I went upstairs, "Remember to keep your door open."_

_I looked at him curiously. "Why should I leave the door open? If something happens, Edward's with me."_

_Charlie looked at me. "That's the exact reason why you should leave the door open," he muttered._

_I stared at him until he explained his statement._

"_It's not like I don't trust you two but you are growing up and if it was any other boy I would probably cut off my own head before giving him permission to stay in the same room as you."_

He stayed true to his word, checking in on us every night after we had fallen asleep.

The days passed, some slowly while others passed quickly. I either slept soundly for hours or not at all.

Today was the day I had to go back to Carlisle for treatment options. I had been dreading today for the past two weeks.

To put off leaving the house straight away, I made up the excuse of checking my email. Surprisingly, I had quite a few from Alice and even some from Emmett. I opened the first one and smiled. Alice had sent me all of the photos from her 'sleepover'. I scanned through them all and stopped on the last one. It was a picture of Edward and I asleep in his bed. I smiled at it and went to save all of them onto my hard drive.

"Bella?" Edward knocked on the door, "We have to go now or we're going to be late."

I switched off the computer and went to put on my shoes. "I'm coming."

* * *

**Phil/ Frank**

* * *

Everyday I had logged into her computer and everyday I came up with nothing. She had a few emails but I couldn't see them until she opened them herself.

As the days passed I was supplied with more information. It was becoming more expensive but it was worth it. Profiles of old friends arrived one day, complete with pictures of what they look like now. My sources were good.

My work continued in it's boring fashion. I got up, went in, sat at a desk, spoke to moronic idiots who could be beaten by monkeys, and came home. They highlight of my week was the pizza delivery where I would get either more information or more gear.

As I came in from an out of town conference, there was a flashing light on my phone indicating a message.

_It's only me bro. I have the plans for the trip Mom made earlier. Everything's good to go. Hopefully we'll see you soon._

I grinned.

Finally, I was cleared to take a trip to Forks. Even though I would not get to see the girl, I would still be able to scope out the town and check out everything I needed to.

I walked over to the computer and started it up. I bypassed all of her security and went straight to seeing if she had anything interesting on it. My eyes light up. She had finally opened the emails.

The first few that I came across were boring ones from friends of hers. Who knew she had any? The last one I came to was interesting.

_Hope you enjoy these, I took them at the sleepover._

I searched her computer for new files and struck gold. Photos, loads of them.

Some were of her and some short girl with black hair. Alice Cullen I believe was her name. Some had guys in them. Emmett and Edward Cullen. Brothers of Alice and old friends of Bella's. The last photo caught my attention. The girl was asleep in bed with the younger brother, their limbs tangled under the sheets.

So she's found herself a boyfriend then? This changes things a bit.

* * *

**A/N: Short but there is a lot in there.**

**PTSD is real, look it up on wikipedia or Google if you want to learn more.**

**Basically it occurs if someone has suffered from abuse (physical, psychological or mental), been in extreme or traumatic situations involving alcohol or drug abuse, or been in the army or marines. Epileptic seizures are common recurrences with the disorder if the person is subjected to extreme stimuli (bright, flashing lights or loud noises), or if flashbacks and nightmares occur. Similar seizures, like the ones in previous chapters, can occur if memories are triggered.**


	13. Back to the Cullen's

**A/N: Glad to see no-one hated me too much after the last chapter!**

I've decided that writing chapters upon chapters of basically the same thing would be monotonous so I skipped a couple of weeks in the last chapter and we're moving into October in this one (keep in mind that the faster the pace, the sooner most of you get what you want).

**Remember, 14****th**** August, go to The Twilight Awards (link's on my profile and some of the last chapters) to vote for this story.**

Thanks to:

**Xx EdwardLova xX**

**sovoyita **(yay 'awesomeness' has returned)

**kariepaige08**

**nicole036**

**Superhinata**

**Shining Eclipse**

**Aimee **(lol STRAD/Clingfilm Fairy)

**Luvntwilight**

**Lauren Indie**

**bloodredeclipse**

**TwilightLover15**

**ericca.xx**

**TwilightNerd**

**Shedemon01**

**lgr42293**

**waterdemon09**

**Sorry for not posting sooner, I had this written and ready three days ago and I sent it twice to Shining Eclipse, my new beta, but I never got it back so now I think my msn account is screwed up or she just hasn't gotten it yet…**

**Oct 8th**

**Bella Swan**

Everyday since the first appointment, I always thought over what Carlisle had told me.

He explained to me about PTSD. How it affected people who have been in certain situations. How it could affect my daily life before all treatment was complete. When I could return to school…

I learnt that my earlier decision to not speak was actually caused by the disorder. Apparently it happened to many people who have suffered abuse or been in traumatic situations.

My treatment would kick off with sensory and stimuli treatments to help cure, or ease off, the threat of epileptic seizures. I was told that I wasn't suffering from epilepsy itself but I was prone to similar seizures.

After that treatment I would have to go in for some eye sensory treatment and counselling. Group therapy would follow once I was comfortable in social situations.

I knew that in my head I sounded blunt, serious and professional. I couldn't match emotions to events anymore. I_ knew_ that I should be upset about having this disorder, or at least relieved to know what was going on with me, but I felt numb, again.

Days would pass when I would barely crack a smile, laughter was rare. I hadn't cried since the day I woke up from the seizure. I tried talking to Carlisle about it and he told me that I would eventually 'feel' again in time, it had something to do with my brain excepting and processing what I had learned.

The only emotion I could feel was worry. I worried over the fact that I may not return to normal. I worried that I was being a burden. I worried that Charlie might hate me. I worried that Edward…

I couldn't understand what was happening with Edward. My every thought seemed to return to him in some way. When we were together the atmosphere was different, not uncomfortable but more awkward than before. I felt strange when I was around him. I was constantly worrying about my appearance and how I acted. I've never felt this way before in my life.

He seems to have changed around me since… I don't even know what to call it, since the _thing_ almost happened. I always notice him staring at me. He always lets his hand linger on mine when he touches me, not that I mind, but I have noticed this more recently.

Unfortunately Charlie picked up on a lot of this also. My bedroom door has to be open at all times when we're upstairs. Edward has to stay in the sitting room downstairs while I'm changing or getting ready in the bathroom. Rules have been set in place that have never existed before. Edward is now referred to as 'that boy'.

Getting ready for my return to the Cullen's house, I smiled to myself when Charlie came upstairs on the pretence of checking my closet for a missing pair of socks. He made this a regular habit, making sure that Edward hadn't climbed through my window and was hiding in my room. I felt sorry for Edward, he had to make as much noise as possible downstairs to prove that he wasn't anywhere near me.

I was going back to the Cullen's house because I was starting the last stage of the sensory and stimuli treatments and Carlisle wanted me to try handling crowded situations again. We had planned to start off with going to the local diner and then, if I was okay with that, Edward and Alice were going to bring me up to Port Angeles to do some shopping.

I was against the shopping part but I was desperate to get back to normal life as soon as possible.

Charlie grumbled as he left my room, Edward had appeared in the doorway and proved that he was in fact downstairs and not hiding in the closet.

"You ready to go?" he asked, sitting on the edge of my bed.

I zipped my duffel bag and grabbed a small purse. "Yes."

We walked downstairs, and after saying goodbye to Charlie, I felt a little relieved to be away from his controlling attitude. Carlisle and Esme were so much more relaxed and trusting than Charlie, as proven by Emmett almost every weekday at four in the morning when he comes home from Rosalie's house and wakes everyone up.

"I'm so sorry about Charlie, I don't know why he's acting like this now," I said to Edward and he started the car.

"It's fine, he has every right to be concerned about you," he laughed.

The drive was quiet after that. We arrived at Edward's house quickly, mainly because if his reckless speed.

"It's good to have you here again, Bella," Esme gushed as we walked into the kitchen.

Alice was perched on a stool, engrossed in another fashion magazine. I avoided her gaze when she looked up at me, her eyes measuring me out for some dress or top. Emmett was sprawled on a couch in the sitting room, a can of soda in one hand and a giant bag of chips in the other.

"Woo! Touchdown!" he boomed as whoever was playing scored. The soda spilled in a large arc onto the carpet as he jumped up.

"Emmett! Look at the mess you made!" Esme scolded, running over to dab the puddle before it stained the carpet.

Edward laughed at his brother's display. I giggled meekly, knowing that I couldn't handle Emmett's annoyance as well as Edward.

"It's not my fault, the Coke wanted to party and the can was trying to smother it's freedom," he jumped onto the couch, the hand with the chips over his heart and the can held above his head, "We have to fight the can power, man!"

Edward burst into near hysterics. Even Alice was laughing. Esme smiled but her expression turned back to annoyance. "If you get any crushed chips or soda on my couch, I swear, I will take away your Jeep."

Emmett fell from his Brave-heart speech stance. "Not Gina. Anything but taking away my Gina," he cried.

Edward fell over laughing and Alice had trouble breathing.

"Gina?" she asked.

He looked at us as if we had asked the most stupid question ever thought of. With a huff, he hopped off the couch and stalked past us.

"I'll be in my room if anyone cares," he said, throwing his head back dramatically.

I laughed, he looked like a diva. Alice returned to her magazine and pouted.

"I'm the drama queen in this family and he's stealing my thunder," she whined, "Bella, help me get back my crown?" She had on her trademark puppy eyes. Thankfully Edward intervened.

"Sorry Alice, she has treatments all this week and then we have to take her to the diner next week and then to Port Angeles the week after," he told her, grabbing my hand and leading me from the kitchen.

I mouthed a thank you to him on our way upstairs. He seemed to be the only person capable of escaping Alice.

It was almost six o'clock now and the sun had begun to set, bathing the rooms in the back of the house a reddish colour. Edward's golden themed room combined with the setting sun created a shade close to the colour of his hair.

I smiled slightly when I squinted my eyes and the top of his head disappeared into the back wall.

"What are you smiling over?" Edward asked, slumping onto his bed.

I shrugged and climbed up beside him. "Nothing."

He turned around so he was lying on his back and stared up at the ceiling.

"It had to be something to have you grinning like that," he replied.

I could see the corners of his mouth lifting up and knew he was smirking. I lay back beside him.

"Yeah? And since when did you gain Access All Areas to my head?"

He turned and I was literally blown away by the sight of him in the light streaming through the window. I shook my head and realised he was saying something to me.

"…always had it. Bella?"

I snapped out of my daze before I started drooling.

"Sorry, what were you saying?"

Edward's faced went a little pink and he muttered, "nothing". He ran his hand through his hair, something he always did when he was debating something, and let out a deep breath.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked quietly.

"I… nothing," he replied.

**Edward Cullen**

"I… nothing."

What was I meant to say? I knew how she was looking at me. I looked at her exactly the same way. I wasn't an idiot, I picked up the signs before.

I couldn't exactly say 'I really like you and I know you like me.' I never regretted saying that I liked her before but considering what had happened, I could have picked a better time to do it. I was going to wait this time and let her be the one to say it.

Alice had been pestering me for the past couple of weeks. She wanted to push Bella into a relationship with me. I was not going to force Bella into something she didn't want, but Alice was determined to make us a couple before the Halloween dance.

"_All you have to do is ask her out or even kiss her."_

_The pixie sat on the table, her hands in her lap and her legs crossed neatly._

"_It's not like I'm asking you to marry her, Edward, although an ivory gown would look wonderful on her…"_

I cringed at that memory. We were only seventeen and already my sister had our future planned out for us. I wouldn't be surprised if she had found a house for Emmett and Rose and a pension scheme for Dad.

I risked a glance at Bella. She mirrored me, lying on her back with one hand behind her head. I stared openly at the sight of her drenched in the evening glow, the light making he brown hair glint with gold and red. I quickly turned away when she glanced over at me. I was always stupid enough to get caught.

"What were you staring at?" she asked playfully, rolling onto her stomach and propping herself up on her elbows.

I decided to break the tense atmosphere Emmett-style. "You have a little something right here." I reached over and grabbed her waist, pulling her down. Sitting on my knees, I commenced tickling her.

"Edward!… Stop-stop it!" Bella laughed.

I had to chuckle at her. When we were little she used to always love this kind of thing, even though she pretended to be annoyed afterwards. Now, it was still the same.

She laughed and tried to roll away from me. I gripped her waist to keep her from getting too far and continued to tickle her. I felt something being wrapped around my waist and I realised she was trying to pull me off of her with her legs.

"What the hell is going on here?!"

I stopped tickling Bella and looked at the door. Emmett and Alice stood there giggling. Emmett had a look of mock disgust on his face.

"I expect this from me and Rose not Golden Boy and Bella," he struggled to talk with his shoulders shaking from laughter, "I'm ashamed, you could have at least told me what was going on. There's no need to hide things from me- Ow!"

Mom had come up behind him and smacked him hard across the head.

"What's going on… Oh," she smiled when she looked at us.

I looked down and realised I was still on top of Bella, her legs locked around my waist. Crap this did look bad.

"We'll leave you two alone," Alice giggled, closing the door behind her.

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do," Emmett shouted. That list was very short to say the least.

I quickly rolled off Bella. Everything was quiet for a moment. I looked at her and noticed she was struggling to contain her laughter. One look at me caused us both to burst into hysterics.

"That was…awkward," she said blushing.

I felt the heat creep onto my face as well. "Um, yeah."

Everything went silent after that. I kept glancing at Bella, only to notice her looking away from me or staring at me as well.

I wondered when this was going to end or change. For the past couple of weeks we usually played this game, I would stare at her and catch her staring at me and vice versa.

"Movie time!" Emmett boomed from downstairs.

I got up off the bed and walked over to Bella's side before she had even turned over. I offered her my hand and she took it. I always liked how her hand fit in easily with mine.

We walked downstairs and were greeted by two pairs of overly curious eyes. Alice and Emmett stared at us intently as we sat down while Rose sat sipping an iced tea.

"Damn it, even their hair hasn't been messed up," Emmett muttered.

Rose choked on her drink. "Emmett!"

He looked at Alice. "Does this mean we're wrong or they're just really good at cleaning themselves up?"

Rose hit him over the head. "It means you have very sickening thoughts. This is Edward and Bella we're talking about," she spat at him, sending us an apologetic glance.

Alice looked disappointed. The doorbell rang and she jumped up. We all knew it had to be Jasper, she never answered the door to anyone but him. She walked back into the room with him in tow and put in the movie.

I wrapped my arm around Bella's shoulders, something I always done on a movie night. She settled into my side and, sure enough, was fast asleep before the first scene was finished.

**Oct 9th**

**Bella Swan (Sorry for changing so much)**

I was dragged reluctantly from an extremely deep sleep.

"Come on you two, get up already!"

Alice had not only graciously alerted us to her presence by yelling in our ears, but by also jumping repeatedly on the bed.

I cracked open an eye and was greeted with the sight of Edward hidden under several pillows. Alice was bouncing merrily at the end of the bed. Closing my eye again, I snuggled deeper under the sheets, silently chanting the mantra, "If I can't see you, you can't see me."

Alice's course changed slightly as she moved over to Edward's side of the bed. He groaned at first before bolting upright.

"Alice! You just crushed my leg!"

I mumbled at the sight of light seeping from the opening in the sheets above my head. Pulling the sheets firmly out of Edward's grasp, I made myself a comfortable, hidden den.

"You have to get ready soon because Bella's appointment's at ten," Alice chirped, finally giving up and jumping off the bed.

After the door closed, I relinquished the sheets and popped my head out. "What time is it now?" I asked yawning.

Edward grabbed the alarm clock beside the bed. "It's… no!" He hopped off the bed and darted into the bathroom.

I looked at the clock. It was half nine. Groaning loudly, I got out of the warm bed and made my way down to Alice's room to get ready.

She had taken the liberty of stocking her closet with numerous outfits for me. I barely used half of the stuff, choosing things that I would wear grudgingly or would be able to cover up with a large sweatshirt. It was definitely easier this way than being dragged shopping with Alice.

I was ready to leave after ten minutes and waited for Edward in the garage. He appeared from the door with a bagel stuffed in his mouth, trying to put his arms through a jacket.

"Do'h yuh dah lawf," he said through the bagel in his teeth. His hair was sticking up at all angles from his head, a sign of haphazard towel drying.

Once in the car, he started chewing his breakfast quickly and started up the engine. I was grateful for his speed today, we had less than ten minutes to do a twenty minute drive. We arrived at the hospital eight minutes after we left.

"If we didn't get stuck behind that truck then we would have gotten here five minutes earlier," Edward muttered as we walked to Carlisle's office.

Carlisle, thankfully, agreed to oversee all of my treatments and counselling. Today was my last sensory treatment. After this, the threat of seizures that were caused by stimuli would be minimal or non-existent. I was relieved that once we were finished here, I could dump my sunglasses. Wearing shades in a town were cloud cover is constant is like sticking a neon sign over your head, everyone stares.

The session today was longer than the others, lasting almost three hours.

"How do you feel?" Edward asked as we walked back outside.

"A bit drowsy and my eyes are a little sore," I replied. After being subjected to the numerous tests, I was glad that this part of my treatment was over. Now all I had left were some counselling sessions. Unfortunately I was told that the counselling part was the longest and the sessions could carry on for two months or four years. It all depended on the person and their past.

I pushed all thought of counselling to the back of my mind, determined to focus on the good points of today.

Carlisle told me that as soon as I was okay with crowded areas, I could return to school. Edward wasn't too happy about that. He told me he didn't want to go back to classes but I felt that he had another reason.

"But why though? I mean, you like school. You enjoy most of your classes."

He shrugged. We were sitting in the sitting room, watching Jasper and Emmett fight in some epic battle on their X-Box.

"I feel like school… isn't important anymore. I mean, I don't feel challenged in any way. I get A's in every class but I don't put in any effort. It's too easy, I need something more difficult."

Emmett dropped his controller.

"You think school is _easy_?" he asked.

Jasper punched the air in victory after slicing Emmett's character into pieces. Edward shrugged again. Emmett stared at him.

"I'm failing just about everything except for Gym, well I get have a C average in Chem.…" he grumbled.

Jasper snickered. "That's because you gave Ms Davis a Valentine's card back in your Freshman year."

"It was a prank okay, and some idiot wrote my name in it after I put it in her desk," Emmett mumbled, "Well, Eddie, if you think school's easy now, wait until you two go back."

Edward cringed at Emmett's name for him.

"What's happening when we go back?" I asked.

"Preparations for the Halloween dance," Alice sang as she waltzed into the room. She hopped onto Jasper's lap and stared at me, "We have to go dress shopping for you."

I shook my head. Alice glared.

"We. Are. Going. Dress. Shopping," she said menacingly.

My battle was a losing one but I was determined to fight until the end.

"But I can't go out yet."

Alice smirked. "Remember we're planning to go up to Port Angeles in two weeks?"

I was struck down. I only had one more excuse left.

"I don't have a date."

Alice stared at me. "Edward will take you. It's not like he's going to ask someone else and he's probably too embarrassed to ask you himself."

Emmett and Jasper chuckled.

"Look at him! He's blushing more than Bella!" Emmett shouted.

I looked over and saw that Edward was indeed bright red. He avoided everyone's gaze and looked intently at the floor. I was feeling extremely sorry for him.

"You don't have to take me if you don't want to," I mumbled.

He face turned a couple of shades darker. "No, I wanted to ask you but…" he mumbled.

"Alice got there first?" I laughed.

He nodded, smiling a little but not looking up.

"Come on Bella. I have to show you this dress that I spotted the other day in my magazine." Alice grabbed me and pulled me upstairs. We had recently found out that Alice, Edward, Emmett and Jasper could touch me safely. We hadn't yet tried Rosalie, Esme or Carlisle.

I heard Emmett roaring with laughter as we walked upstairs.

"Aw! Eddie's got a crush on Bella!"

**A/N: Vote tomorrow!!**

**Now do you want Bella to go back to school next or shopping with Alice? Keep in mind that I have good ideas for both options but one you would probably enjoy more than the other… And no, there will be no repeat of the Port Angeles scene in Twilight if you pick the second option.**


	14. Dates in Diners and Shopping with Alice

**A/N: **The majority of the votes for this chapter were in favour of shopping, which is the one that I believe you will like best because… I'm throwing in an extra chapter. Enjoy the 2-for-1-ness. Also that's the reason for the lateness of this update, twice the length means twice the time to write it up.

As always, reviews are what keep me writing and they are basically the eggs and O-negative blood that fuel this story (those of you who have finished BD will automatically start screaming one word at this reference!).

E-cookies and awesomeness (awesomus lol) gratitude go out to:

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**And thanks to Shining Eclipse for taking the time to edit this (I swear I will try harder this time to get this to you!)**

* * *

**Part 1**

**Oct 13th**

**Bella Swan**

* * *

Of all days, we had to plan to have my first public outing on Friday 13th. I knew Alice had some sort of psychic ability but this was too… weird.

Emmett of course, found it hilarious. He constantly reminded me to avoid black cats, walking under ladders and spilling salt. Thankfully Rosalie had threatened him with the frightening prospect of ending their relationship if he didn't stop bothering me. She was serious enough to have the back-up option of 'fixing' Gina.

Carlisle had proposed all six of us going to the diner in the morning, as most of the usual customers would be at school or at work. Emmett and Alice were delighted with the scheduled day off school. Although skipping school was a regular practice for the Cullens, it was an infrequent occasion when Carlisle announced that they _had_ to stay at home that day.

All of us woke up late. I was determined to sleep through the event.

It wasn't that I was annoyed about going to the diner, it was just that I had been subjected to 'Barbie-Bella' for two nights in a row and wanted to have one day of walking around in an oversized sweatshirt and pants because Alice had no time to dress me up.

"Bella?" Edward's voice vibrated through his chest.

We were lying in bed, awake but trying to put off facing the others.

I groaned and buried my head deeper into his chest. "What?"

Edward chuckled. The sound and movement shook my body. "It's almost midday. If we don't get up now then Alice or Emmett will come and force us to get up."

Visions of Alice and Emmett flashed through my head. I gulped and sat up.

"Fine. I'm up. But I get first shower since you woke me up this morning."

Edward laughed, obviously remembering what had happened earlier. "You laughed at it, didn't you?"

I shrugged and swung my legs out of the sheets. "Of course I laughed at it. Who wouldn't laugh at Emmett being chased by a duck at four in the morning? But the fact of the matter is that you woke me up at four in the morning, from a deep sleep, from a very good dream if I might add-"

"I get your point," he laughed. A mischievous gleam came into his eyes. "What was your dream about?"

I swallowed hard. "Um…" He had to ask me that. What was I meant to say? Oh yeah I had a brilliant dream where-

"Gah! The little monster is following me!"

Emmett's shouting and thundering footsteps echoed behind the closed door. Edward walked over and pulled it open.

"Get it away from me!" Emmett screamed as he ran past the open door.

Edward chuckled but stopped abruptly. "Is that what I think it is?" he asked Alice who had popped into the room.

"Yes, Rose caught it last night as payback for naming his car 'Gina'," she replied.

I ran over to the door and heard quacking noises. The small duck that we had seen earlier this morning was waddling after Emmett. The sight of it, running down the hallway, after a terrified six foot four Emmett was too funny for words.

Rosalie walked up beside us looking very pleased with her handiwork. An amused Carlisle jogged by the door, stopping briefly to glance at the four of us.

"Just make sure the duck is brought back out soon and doesn't destroy Esme's flowers or carpets."

He dodged the duck who was trying to figure out how to get down the stairs without plummeting to a feathery death. With a loud quack he waddled forward and launched himself off the top step, landing a few steps down with a small 'thud'. Continuing on his quest to follow Emmett, who had now entered the garage and was failing to start up his car, the duck successfully hopped it's way downstairs and was making it's way towards the open door to the garage.

The loud whirring noises and swearing coming from the garage told us that Rose had tampered with Gina and Emmett was stuck with an imminent date with a duck.

Esme opened her door and popped her head out.

"What's going on?" she asked.

Rose shrugged and walked away, going to observe Emmett's antics. Alice decided to answer.

"Rose got a duck to chase Emmett last night and now it's following him around."

Esme nodded and moved back to close her door again. "Just make sure it doesn't destroy my carpets," she murmured.

Edward shook his head. "How come when a duck is roaming free around the house, scaring Emmett, no-one cares?"

Bouncing over to the closet, Alice shrugged. "It's Emmett." She proceeded to search through the mountain of shirts, jumpers, trousers, jeans and jackets until she had made her decision.

"Right, you are wearing this shirt with these jeans and either those black shoes I got you last week or the ones Mom bought you the other day," she said as she laid out the outfit on the bed. "Bella I have your outfit ready in my room."

I groaned and glared at Alice. "Remind me again why I need a planned outfit for a trip to lunch in a diner? It's not like we're going to a party or something."

Alice smirked and glanced over at Edward who had suddenly expressed an urgent requirement for a shower.

Great, now I was fighting alone.

I slouched out of the room and made my way to Alice's room, determined to at least go down with whatever amount of dignity I could muster in holey shorts and an old t-shirt of Edward's.

Alice spend a ridiculous amount of time on my hair today. I refused to wear any make-up considering I would be eating and drinking so the majority of it would wear off or be washed off in the rain on the way into the diner.

Thirty minutes later, I was finally released and allowed to go downstairs. I sat on the couch and waited for the others to come down.

I heard Alice running into Edward's room. Once the door was opened, they automatically started arguing.

"What are you doing?" Alice shrieked.

"I'm trying to fix this," Edward snapped back.

The door was closed and the argument was muted. I sighed and went in search of Emmett.

"Emmett?" I called as I walked down to his room. I opened the door nervously, hoping I wasn't interrupting anything. The room was empty.

Frowning, I walked over to the small room that housed the second television, X-Box and DVD player. No-one was in here either.

I ran downstairs to the garage, thinking that maybe Rosalie and Emmett were reconnecting Gina's engine. It was empty too.

I walked slowly up to Edward's room, wondering where the hell everyone had gone to. We were meant to leave in ten minutes.

"Edward?" I asked, knocking on his door. Alice's shrieking and his shouting stopped immediately. The door opened to reveal a very frustrated Alice. I stepped into the room and noticed Edward standing by the other wall, looking nervous.

"Where had everyone gone to?" I asked them. Alice crossed her arms and smirked at Edward. Edward, if at all possible, seemed to grow more embarrassed and uncomfortable.

I looked between the two of them until Alice spoke.

"Emmett and Rose have gone out for the day. I'm meeting Jasper in a couple of minutes. Dad's gone to work and Mom's out with some friends," she chirped.

"But what about lunch?"

Alice's smirk grew. "Shall I tell her or are you going to gather up whatever measly amount of courage you possess?" she asked Edward.

He glared back at her but stayed silent. Alice giggled. "Edward didn't have the guts to ask you on a real date before the dance so we arranged for you two to be alone today."

I stared and her and my face flushed. I fixed my eyes onto the floor and shuffled my feet uncomfortably. Alice groaned.

"Great! Now both of you are embarrassed. How are you even going to get to the diner if you won't look at each other?" she glared at us and shook her head. "You know what, it's either you both get into the car and go to the diner, or you join us in a game of Truth or Dare tonight."

Edward's head snapped forward. He was pale white.

"I see I got your attention Eddie," Alice sang. She darted out of the door and shouted over her shoulder, "Remember the other choice."

"We should get going," Edward said quietly.

I nodded and followed him out of the door. We kept two feet between us, just like before when I moved back here. The awkwardness that had developed since before my epileptic fit seemed to have come to a point where we would either progress in our relationship or fall back.

Edward opened my door when we reached the car. I mumbled a 'thanks' and slid in. The drive to the diner was… silent.

"Hi, I'm Jacob and I'm your server for today." He handed us our menus and kept his eyes on me for the entire time, ignoring Edward. I shrank into my seat on the other side of the booth to Edward and glanced over at him.

He was glaring at Jacob with a look that could only be described as jealousy.

"Do you want anything to drink?" Jacob asked enthusiastically, directing the question to me. I sent Edward a pleading look.

"We'll have two Cokes," Edward said curtly. I gave him a small smile in thanks for taking Jacob's attention off of me.

Jacob's looked at Edward and walked off, muttering something like 'annoying boyfriend' under his breath. Edward continued to glare at Jacob until he disappeared into the kitchen.

"As much as I am grateful to you for getting rid of him, you don't have to murder him with you eyes," I said to Edward.

He turned to look at me and met my gaze. "He was looking at you as if you were his next meal. I wouldn't be surprised if his thoughts were as graphic as…" He lowered his gaze and mumbled incoherently.

"As what?" I asked.

Edward sighed and grabbed the bottle of ketchup that sat at the end of the booth. Turning it in his hands, he began to speak.

"You have no idea how many males you affect here Bella," he said softly, still not looking at me. "Although some are… awestruck by your presence, others tend to create messed up situations in their heads. _He_," he jerked his head towards the kitchen with a look of pure hatred, "was past the PG-13 mark in his head."

I slowly nodded, confused by what he had said. I was… Bella. Plain, boring, clumsy, stupid Bella.

"You don't believe me do you?"

My head snapped up and I looked at Edward. He stared straight back at me.

"No, I don't," I muttered.

Leaning back against his chair, Edward sighed once again. "You still don't believe how beautiful and funny and nice and smart you are, do you?" he looked at me intensely. "I still stand by what I said to you before, Bella," he said softly, almost whispering the words.

I opened my mouth to talk when a waitress appeared at our booth.

"Two Cokes?" she asked, staring at Edward and completely ignoring my presence. She was tall, blonde and much prettier than I was. Not naturally beautiful like Rosalie, more… fake. Her fake-tan was streaky on her arms and her teeth were whitened so much it hurt to look directly at her mouth. Still, she was five foot nine inches of leggy-blondeness.

And I immensely disliked her immediately.

She batted her eyelashes at Edward unnecessarily and leaned forward so as her top strained to contain her unnaturally large chest. I wanted to punch her for staring at Edward.

"Um, yes," Edward said, "For my girlfriend and I." He pointed at me and I smiled at the waitress. I was glad that my face could not display that my heart was singing inside of me.

Blondie pouted and dumped our drinks in front of us. I had a feeling that Jacob had traded our booth with her and now she was finding someone else to trade with. My thoughts were confirmed when a middle-aged woman came out and took our orders.

Edward stared at me after we had ordered our food.

"What?"

He shook his head and smiled. "You looked as if you wanted to give the first waitress a black-eye."

I glared at him. "She was undressing you with her eyes. Did you see how she was batting her eyelashes and shoving her chest in your face?"

Edward smirked and raised an eyebrow. "So you were a little bit jealous?"

"I- well… but you," I stuttered. I gave up trying to make up excuses, "Now we're even."

"Aw…"

I spun around in my seat in time to see two heads disappear under a table a few booths away from us. Edward got up from his seat and walked over, pulling a chuckling Emmett from under the table. Jasper fell out after him. "Thanks," Jasper said, rubbing his shoulder, "Emmett was cutting off my circulation."

Giggling came from under the table and Edward stared at the source. Rosalie and Alice tumbled out from their hiding place. They looked at me and burst into laughter.

"It's… so obvious…and you two…can't even see it!" Rosalie said in between giggles.

Emmett got off the floor and walked over to our booth, sliding in opposite me. "What's so obvious?" he asked Rosalie.

She sighed and slapped him on the head as she pushed him further so she could slide in. "That Edward and Bella are in love with each other."

I choked on the mouthful of Coke I had taken and spluttered until it finally went down. Edward had rushed over and was staring at me to make sure I was okay.

"I knew that already, I thought you were talking about something else," Emmett said. He grabbed one of the menus and looked through the selection. "Rosie, can we get the Xtra-Large Flamin' Nachos?" he asked with a pout.

I pushed myself further into the booth so as Edward and Jasper could fit in beside me. Alice had taken a seat beside Rosalie and was taking the opportunity to stare and both Edward and I.

The only person I could look at without being observed like a scientific experiment, or subjected to a awkward public display of affection, was Edward.

He was glancing at me when I looked at him, and smiled weakly at me. I looked down and noticed that he was wringing his hands nervously in his lap. Blushing furiously, I reached my hand over and took one of his. Gazing up at him, I took in his beaming face.

"Oh! What's after happening?" Alice almost shouted. Jasper tried to scold her.

"But she's glowing and his smile is nearly bursting his cheeks open," she whined, "Here, Emmett, hold still for a moment." She grabbed Emmett's shoulders and launched herself forward so as she was lying on the table.

"Aw! They're holding hands! Rose, get the camera!"

Edward pushed Alice forcefully back to her seat, never letting go of my hand, and scowled at her. "Sometimes you're worse than Mom," he said.

Alice shrugged, looking a bit defeated but still up for a challenge. "I get a lot of things from Mom; my sense of style, my love of pink, my adoration for shopping…" She sent me a look and I cowered against Edward. "You know Bella, we still have to get you a dress," she said with a grin.

* * *

**Part 2**

**Oct 14th**

**Alice Cullen**

* * *

I was determined to not allow this opportunity to go to waste. I had Bella with me for a day and we _had_ to get her a dress, a new wardrobe, maybe a couple of pairs of shoes… OMG! I have to get those.

I pulled Bella into the first shop we arrived at, seeing the pair of black Marc by Marc Jacobs flats that would go perfectly with a pair of skinny jeans in the window. Ten minutes had passed and already my credit card had received a six hundred dollar swipe on one purchase. I was lucky Mom had upped my limit.

"Remind me again why we are here? I thought we were only looking for my dress," Bella moaned as we walked around the Betsey Johnsen store. They had a few cute dresses in here but I ignored them to search for items for Bella's new wardrobe. She couldn't force me to leave until we had found 'the' dress so buying everyday outfits was the main priority before dress shopping.

"Because we are not here _just_ for a dress," I explained as I quickly searched through the rows of clothing. I stopped before a blue dress.

"It's perfect," Rose breathed. It was cute; a strapless teal coloured number, with sequins all over the mesh covering the material. It was too… house party-ish. I wanted drop dead stunning.

"Size 2 or 4, Bella?" I asked, pulling out the two sizes.

"2," she answered. I pulled out the dress and added it to the two cardigans and tote that we had chosen for Bella.

"The total is 975.60," the girl behind the desk told me. Finally my card was getting a well deserved workout. That purchase in Marc Jacobs and this total were nothing compared what happens when I am unleashed in a more expensive store.

Bella was pale as she heard how much was being spent on her. "Alice that's almost one thousand dollars in one store!"

I shrugged and stared her down. "That jacket you are wearing," I pointed to her new Armani Collezioni leather motorcycle jacket that I ordered for her the other week from Saks online, "cost about two thousand after tax."

I thought she was going to either explode or faint with the way her face was changing shades. Thankfully she realised that giving up was the best choice and left the store without a fight.

The guys waited outside the store and took our bags as soon as we walked out. Edward took to Bella's side immediately and it was easy to see how much she relaxed once she was near him.

Emmett grabbed Rose's bags quickly, knowing that making her carry them for too long would result in his head being pounded or something much worse…

Jasper held mine, a mean feat considering how many he held already.

We walked from store to store slowly, always wary of Bella. If a large crowd of people or a particularly loud group walked in our direction, we automatically 'spotted' something in the nearest store that we had to check out. At one point Emmett yelled that he needed to go into Victoria's Secret because a bunch of frat boys spotted Rosalie and Bella and were walking over.

Emmett in Victoria's Secret was hilarious. Once he spotted the frat boys he shouted 'I need to see about getting that' and pointed over his shoulder to the display window full of bras and nightwear, unaware of what he was gesturing at.

Inside the store was even funnier. He approached the sales staff and asked about seeing a blood red corset. When Jasper asked why the hell he was thinking about getting himself a corset, Emmett said it was for Rose. Sure enough that earned him a slap and a threat to never see Gina again.

We walked around the mall and had visited just about every store when we came to our last stop, the store I knew would contain Bella's dress.

I darted over to the dress and started to bounce. "I found it!"

Rose and Bella walked over and stared at the dress.

It was perfect. A Cyril Verdavainne emerald strapless taffeta dress with a feather and sequin mesh hem. In contrast to Bella's pale skin, dark eyes and dark hair, it would look stunning. It also happened to coincidently match Edward's eyes and his tie for the suit I had bought him.

I grabbed the dress in Bella's size and marched right up to the desk to pay for it. I handed Edward the bag and grinned at Rose. "Now all we need to find are masks."

Bella and Edward stared at us. "Masks?" they said at the same time.

"It's a Halloween dance, you have to dress-up according to the theme. This year's theme is a Masquerade Ball," Rose explained. I started to bounce again, a knee-jerk reaction to realising something good. Rose looked at me for an explanation to my sudden burst of energy.

"We get to keep shopping!" I squealed, and proceeded to lead everyone out of the store.

* * *

**Edward Cullen**

* * *

Where my sister gets all of her energy from, I do not know.

It was gone eight o'clock and we were heading back home after a gruelling ten hours of constant shopping. Rosalie and Emmett were fast asleep in the back and Bella was dozing off. Jasper was driving Alice home in his car. I don't think I have ever drank so much caffeine in my life. Both Jasper and I had stopped several times at Starbucks during the day to get coffees and espressos to help us keep awake while driving.

As we drove out of Port Angeles, Bella's head slumped forward, indicating that she had finally given in to exhaustion after fighting it for the past thirty minutes.

I allowed my thoughts to wander in the silence of the car.

After yesterday, I was more aware than ever of my relationship with Bella. We both seemed to know that it couldn't keep hanging like this, it would go one way or the other. I was annoyed by the fact that everyone had shown up yesterday. If they hadn't have disrupted us then who knew how the day would have gone?

It seemed as though we were taking small steps in our relationship both yesterday and today. I reminded Bella that I did like her and she accepted that and appeared to display her feelings for me by not running away screaming.

She took my hand more often today than usual. It wasn't the same casual gesture as it had been a few days ago, now it felt… more of a larger gesture. We both blushed whenever the others noticed us holding hands or looking at each other.

Last night was different as well. It seemed extremely subtle but I noticed it. We seemed to hold each other. Bella didn't cling to me like she did when she was frightened. I didn't pull her to me casually like I always did. It was… well, unusual but in a good way.

Emmett slumped sideways on the backseat and nearly crushed Rose. She woke up disgruntled and pushed him until his head hit the window. His face was pushed against the glass. He opened his mouth and started to snore loudly.

"Please make him stop," I begged Rosalie. She glared at me in the rear-view mirror and shook her head.

We sat in silence for a while. I didn't really know Rosalie that well. We were both the type of people who preferred silence to awkward chatter.

"She's out cold," Rosalie commented, nodding at Bella.

I smiled. "It was her first experience of shopping with Alice."

Rosalie nodded and smiled weakly. "She seemed to improve a lot today."

"Yes she did," I said, looking at Bella. She had been uncomfortable all day in the crowded mall but gradually relaxed. Whenever she was feeling extremely scared, she would ask to stop in the nearest store. I was glad that she felt that she could tell us when she wanted to stop, it wasn't an easy task telling Alice to deviate from her path.

Rosalie took a deep breath. "I know that I don't know much about her, but I understand enough to realise just how strong she is," she said. "I mean after everything that she has been through, she is still able to move on."

I nodded, suddenly realising how little I knew about Rosalie. "Do you remember much from your childhood? If you don't mind me asking."

Rosalie smiled. "It's okay. I don't think Emmett has ever asked me that because he thinks I'm too fragile," she laughed. "You already know that I am Jasper's twin and about out father?"

I nodded.

"Well I never experience first-hand what our father could do. When Dad went away I was taken in by our aunt because Mom couldn't handle two kids and Jasper wanted to stay with her. I basically grew up with Aunt Margaret. I kept in contact with Mom and Jasper, always seeing them every weekend and talking to them on the phone. When I heard about what Dad did, I was shocked. I was always Daddy's Princess and only seen the good side of him. I knew that Jasper and Mom were telling the truth but it still upset me."

She paused for a moment and continued. "Mom and Jasper came to live with me and Aunt Margaret when they left Dad. It was disturbing to see the damage Dad had caused them. I know that Bella has gone through hell but I knew when I met her that pitying her was the worst thing to do. If I ever come across as bitchy, shoot me please," she chuckled.

I laughed and glanced over again at Bella. Her eyes were half open and she was smiling slightly. She didn't noticed my stare and fell back asleep.

* * *

**A/N: One thing I have to say: The duck incident has happened before to a person I know. His sister got annoyed and picked it up from his garden and shoved it into his bed. It liked him a bit too much… No ducks were harmed in that incident or in this story.**

**Sorry to all you Jacob Lovers but this is the last of him in this story. I wanted to stick him in somewhere but I didn't want him to have a big part since the story pretty much revolves around Bella and Edward.**

**So we finally got to hear about Rosalie. I was waiting for someone to pick up on the fact that she was Jasper's twin but said nothing about what had happened in her youth.**

**Sorry for the delay in posting this, I keep writing small bits but then get interrupted and have to start over again the next day.**


	15. Stolen Cars and Stolen ID's

**A/N: I****'****ve come to the decision that Fril (or Phank, or whatever you want to call him) hasn****'****t gotten enough airtime to show off his evilness. So here we go: half a chapter of him (I know, weird that I have half of a chapter but doing a full chapter of him was tedious so I cut it down). Don****'****t kill me yet, because then you won****'****t get the next chapter and then you will miss out on a really good one…**

* * *

**Thanks to:**

**twilight-is-lovee**

**sovoyita**

**bloodredeclipse**

**jadesabre75**

**TwilightLover15**

**F-Clearwater (Thanks for reviewing almost every chapter)**

**Shining Eclipse (I know I thank you as a beta below, but thanks again)**

**Xx Edward Lova xX**

**friscofrilly**

**hershykisses211**

**alesia**

**ericca.xx**

**TwannieUno**

**Luvntwilight**

**TwilightNerd**

**Big thanks to beta extraordinaire **_**Shining Eclipse**_** for editing my hastily put together work.**

* * *

**October 4****th**

**Phil/Frank**

* * *

Today was_ the_ day; the day I visited Forks.

I knew that I couldn't do anything important today or come into contact with the girl, but actually going to the town where she lived would be a big step towards my ultimate goal.

I had spent the past week reviewing details with my suppliers and current 'co-worker', Dave.

He was a professional in this business and although he explained to me before that he usually dealt with more important people than seventeen year old girls; he gave me some valuable hints and tips. I knew enough to successfully complete the task today, but what he knew was priceless.

We spent the best part of two nights exchanging past experiences and what we had accomplished. He had taken down two drug-lords and a few fraudulent millionaires, along with countless other jobs. My own work had been a bit more subtle and closer to home.

He also knew some good dealers in the area, some better than my current one. He supplied me with a car for the journey to and from Forks. I received a beat-up Ford Mondeo to drive to Forks and a SUV to drive back. Using the same car would cause difficulties if I was pulled over by the police on my way there and back.

I had been attending work regularly for the past few weeks. A trained monkey could do my job. All I had to do was show up, sit at a desk, tell my dumb co-workers that their work 'is great' or 'could use some improvement here', and then come home. I spent more time at lunch than I did actually doing activities that used more than seven brain cells.

I had been gaining a good reputation here as well. I had been promoted in work within a month, my neighbors invited me to their weekly dinner parties, and even my boss asked me to accompany him on a business trip to Vegas.

All of this was perfect; what police officer would arrest a man who had a good recommendation at work and in his apartment building, for 'abuse and murder'? My image had changed slightly and I was careful to leave no DNA traces so they couldn't charge me on that. The only way I could be charged is if the girl spotted me.

I had changed. My hair color was different now; I tried shaving my head but I looked too… rough, without hair. I had minor plastic surgery on my face to minimize my large nose. I tried wearing colored contacts but they disrupted my vision, so I gave up on them early on. I had gained a couple of pounds to get rid of my slightly athletic body; no-one would believe I was a baseball player with my flabby stomach.

Unfortunately the girl would still recognize me. Avoiding her until the time was right was the key to my task.

I woke up early to go to Forks. The drive was a couple of hours and I wanted to stop off at a couple of towns along the way so my engine would not give away the fact I started my journey in Seattle.

I was halfway to Forks by eight in the morning. The forests flashed past on either side of the road. I had the radio set to some awful eighties station that kept pumping bad rock songs through the crap speakers on the dashboard and doors. I stopped off at a gas station outside of Port Angeles to fill up again and get something to eat.

The station was almost empty at this hour in the morning; most people were asleep or just getting up. A middle-aged woman stared at me while I swiped my card and stuck the nozzle into the tank. I ignored her.

Walking into the small store at the gas station, I was assaulted by the stench of badly cooked chicken, cleaning fluids and body odor. I quickly browsed the selection of chips, bottled drinks and sandwiches before going up to pay for my purchases. The guy behind the register was young, probably in high school or just starting college. He looked as if he was here for the paycheck, not to work.

"That's five bucks in total," the teen droned, tapping his fingers against the counter. I handed him the bills and grabbed my stuff.

I sat in the car and ate the food. I had stopped at the edge of a forest where picnic benches had been placed for people going on trips through the woods. I still had a thirty minute drive to finish so I had to eat quickly.

I had debated entering from the other side of Forks, looping around so as it looked at though I was coming from the opposite direction. I wanted to check out La Push anyway while I was here today; I might be able to lay low there for a couple of days if needed.

Planning was much harder than actually executing the mission. Once there, every carefully thought out move fell perfectly into place and it seemed as though spending too much time analyzing every angle was unnecessary.

I had spent weeks planning today and out of that amount of time, only a couple of hours would have been useful. My schedule was burned in my mind: enter the town, visit the local stores an business, check out the school, and check out the homes of all of profiles.

Recently I had received quite a few profiles. I had information on the girl's old friends, her current classmates, her teachers and even the local doctors. I could recite birthdates, addresses, heights and eye colors.

Confident that I had memorized all information correctly, I drove into Forks and kept my attention focused on appearing inconspicuous and noting anyone who noticed me.

The generic 'Welcome To…' sign flashed by as I entered the boundaries of the small town. Quickly I turned onto one street and was heading for my first stop; the school.

So far, no-one had paid much attention to me. My car blended in well, as planned. I had passed one of the three stoplights in the town and impatiently waited the six minutes for the red light to switch to green. Stopping or delaying was not permitted; it gave me less time to get away and more time to be noticed.

The school was void of people. We had known that nobody came anywhere near the school on a Saturday between seven in the morning and two in the afternoon. A dance class was held at half two and janitors entered at six in the evening. Security cameras held lots of valuable information and they were surprisingly easy to access.

My mind flicked through all information and pictures I had encountered and quickly matched them to the building itself. Here was where all students entered and exited. Here was the cafeteria where all students gathered for lunch between twelve and one in the afternoon…

Twenty minutes was all that was needed. I was already ahead of schedule. I pulled out of my hiding spot in between a group of trees and quickly made my way down the street to the area where all of the local stores and business were located. I only needed to look at the local diner and the small supermarket. Nothing else was important because the girl would not be connected to them in anyway.

Unfortunately the diner was crowded, although this did help me a bit. I was easily able to slip in and order something to eat while being ignored by the groups of students and adults. I matched one arrogant high school student to the profile of Michael 'Mike' Newton, a classmate of the girl's.

At the end of the incredibly boring lunch, I left the diner and headed into the supermarket across the road. It was the opposite of the diner, virtually empty. I silently cursed at this piece of bad luck.

The cashier noted my arrival and stared as I walked down the first couple of aisles. I grabbed a few items and feigned an interest in a display of cleaning products.

I felt the stares of the cashier and another person behind me. The guy was in his early forties and was half hidden by a line of shelves. He shifted out from his place and walked up to my side. My eyes darted hastily over his appearance and I immediately knew who he was: Charlie Swan.

"Excuse me, do you happen to own that Ford that's parked outside?"

I kept my expression under control. He was observing me just as I was observing him. I nodded and smiled. "Is there something wrong?"

He gave me a small smile. "Unfortunately we've had a tip off that a car similar to yours has been stolen. I just need to see some ID to confirm your ownership."

"Of course." I pulled out my current driver's license. I had already made sure that the car was registered in my name so none of this would happen. I would have to complain to whoever changed the information; they done a very sloppy job.

This was not what I had hoped to happen. Although getting this close to Charlie Swan was a good opportunity, being questioned in relation to a stolen car was not on my schedule. No doubt Charlie Swan would be scrutinizing my every move until I left Forks now.

He looked through my license and took down some of the details. He nodded again and moved to go. I backed away to let him pass but ended up colliding with him.

"Sorry," he muttered.

I walked away and went up to the cashier, stopping when I heard someone call after me.

"Hey! You dropped these," Charlie came running up and handed me my keys.

"Thanks." I turned to hand over my items as he left the store.

"That's ten sixty-five," the cashier told me. I reached in to grab my wallet. Strangely my back pocket was empty; I must have put it into my jacket in the diner. That was empty too. I glanced back to where I had just been standing in the aisle behind me. That was empty too.

Fear and anger washed through me. Not only had I just been asked about a stolen car by Charlie Swan, he must have taken my dropped wallet too.

The one with an old ID card claiming my name was Phil Dwyer.

* * *

**Charlie Swan**

* * *

The man that I had just questioned looked vaguely familiar. I couldn't place him. Surely I had met this Frank before? Maybe I saw a glimpse of him at an old high school reunion?

I gave him back his keys and headed back out to the exit. I spotted something on the floor of the aisle we had just been standing in; my wallet. I grabbed it and went out to my cruiser, anxious to get back home. I had the day off and wanted to see if Harry was up for some late afternoon fishing when he was done with Seth's game.

I arrived home within minutes; traffic was light today. The message light was blinking on the phone. Harry had called and said that he was going to a celebratory dinner since Seth's team won the semi-finals.

Sighing, I settled into another afternoon alone. I should really consider getting a dog since Bella spends most of her time either at Edward's house or with Edward.

A game captured my attention for an hour. Once the Gators had trashed the other team, I went to order some pizza. Grabbing my wallet from my jacket, I pulled out the notes and left them on the table for when the delivery guy came.

I realized that I had put the wallet I had picked off the ground in my back pocket earlier. I didn't have my jacket on in the store.

I reached behind and grabbed it.

It looked similar to my own wallet. I opened it up to see if Frank had a contact number in here so I could return it.

There was a bundle of notes in the wallet, easily a few hundred. No credit cards at all. Coins jingled as I rooted through for the ID card stuffed in the back.

I pulled out the small piece of plastic and looked at it.

The picture showed a different man to Frank. They had similar face structures and the same eye color. I scanned though the information and had a small heart attack when I seen the name.

Phil Dwyer.

Once my breathing returned to normal and I was able to think somewhat rationally, I grabbed the phone. Ringing the station was a priority.

"_Forks'__ Station."_

"Mark. It's Charlie. I need you to listen carefully and call all of the stations in the area, especially downtown Seattle."

"_Charlie. What'__s happened?"_

I took a deep breath and began to explain what had happened today. I described the car and where I had met 'Frank'.

"I picked up his wallet thinking it was mine and went home. I just found an ID card that stated his name is Phil Dwyer. I need you to inform the stations that Phil Dwyer is now Frank and see if you can get some footage from the cameras in the store or from around town."

"_Will do Charlie."_

"Thanks Mark. Bye"

I heard the doorbell ring and jumped, only to realize it was the pizza. I paid the guy quickly and dumped the box on the table, reaching to get the phone again. It was quite late now but I had to know if they had arrived back yet.

"_Hello?"_

"Edward, its Charlie; I need to tell you something. Are you home yet?"

Muttering could be heard from the other end as well as loud snoring.

"_We'__re ten minutes away from the house now. What__'__s happened? Is everything alright?"_

I could hear the engine in the background. Edward's voice sounded worried and I was a bit concerned over how he could take the news while driving. Hopefully he would be able to control himself or pull over.

"Listen. I'm after finding out that Phil is now going by the name of Frank. He was in Forks earlier."

Silence was all that could be heard from the other end now. At least I knew he hadn't crashed yet. Someone asked what was wrong in the background.

"_I assume you don'__t want her to find out,"_ Edward's voice was clipped, extreme fury and a protective edge in his tone. _"I'__ll call you when we get back so you can tell me what happened."_

"Okay. Bye"

I hung up and was suddenly extremely grateful towards Edward. At least I could count on him to put his own life on the line to keep Bella safe.

* * *

**A/N: Another down and now I****'****m working on the next one.**

**I****'****m back to school now so updating will be harder considering that I usually write at one or two in the afternoon.**

**I know it****'****s only half the length of a usual chapter but I want the next one to be extra long.**


	16. Back To Black

**A/N:** The reviews keep coming and coming. Thank you!!

Sorry for the delay, sickness and messed up email accounts can be blamed.

I'm so happy right now, I got my results from my Junior Cert on the 10th and I got 6 A's and 5 B's. I think I'm happier over the fact that I improved from a D to a B in Irish than anything else.

One thing I have to say before I thank everyone: Yes, after 16 chapters you finally get your wish.

**Thanks to:**

**Reiko Katsura (Update Twilight Runway!! Lol 16-wheeler****…**** hmm the idea****…****)**

**FRK921**

**Shining Eclipse**

**nicole036**

**EC4me**

**waterdemon9**

**ShatteredLoveBrokenDreams**

**bloodredeclipse**

**twilight-is-lovee**

**ericca.xx (I know you review every chapter, lol look back and see your name on the lists. The people who I thank for reviewing every chapter write a review for every chapter in one go)**

**Luvntwilight**

**Horsefreak01**

**I.Like.My.Men.Immortal**

**TwilightNerd**

**friscofrilly**

**XxEdwardLovaxX**

**pricel**

**F-Clearwater**

**kaosgurl00**

**Thanks to **_Shining Eclipse_ **for being my beta.**

Another thing I have to say: every now and then I go through the alert lists and take a look at all of your profiles, yes everyone's profiles. I even look at some of the stories (lol soyovita knows this when I plugged her story here earlier). The reason behind this rant-ish thing…. Half of you have NOTHING on your pages. Please, for the sake of the rest of us, put something up. Look at everyone else's, it's all random information and copy-and-pastes.

I want you all to demolish the review count, let's say 40 reviews for this? 104 of you are on alert and I get over 280 hits per chapter so you do the math. And also I'm not posting this until I have about 5,000 words so sorry for the delay.

"_And when a heart breaks,_

_No it don__'__t break even, even._

_And what am I goin__'__ to do,_

_When the best part of me was always you?_

_And what am I supposed to say,_

_When I__'__m all choked up that you__'__re okay?_

_I__'__m fallin__'__ to pieces, yeah._

_I__'__m fallin__'__ to pieces, yeah.__"_

'Breakeven' by The Script

* * *

**Oct 29th**

**Bella Swan**

* * *

The weeks dragged by after the day we spent shopping. I hadn't been home at all since then; I wasn't allowed to go back.

Edward had been acting weird ever since we came back. I woke up in his room the next morning to him sitting on the couch, staring out the window with a hard expression on his face. He was a good actor; I'll give him that. Whenever I asked what was wrong, he lied. He might have thought that he was being convincing. And I let him believe that.

But it's hard to hide a secret from someone who's spent half of their life covering one up.

Charlie called everyday but never spoke to me. Occasionally, he's put on speaker phone and yelled 'hi' to me. That was the extent of our communication for the past two weeks.

Alice, Emmett, Rose and Jasper remained the same. They didn't act strangely when I walked into a room, they didn't stop a hushed conversation when I walked down the stairs, and they didn't look distant when I talked to them.

_Great, what did I do now?_

I groaned and fell face-down onto Edward's bed. It had been my routine to come up here after dinner each day and just lie with my face buried in the pillows. It was easier to think when all I could see was black or creased cotton. Also, the pillows absorbed any tears that fell when I was up here.

I chose to come up here everyday for two reasons. Firstly, Edward usually disappeared off at this time for twenty minutes to an hour, without telling or bringing anyone else. At first we questioned him about where he went, and what he did, but he just ignored our questions. Emmett joked about putting a GPS system in his car so as we could track him, but at this stage I honestly thought that most of us had considered that option. At one point, Esme went out to his Volvo to check how many miles he did during one of his trips.

The second reason I came up here was because the others were beginning to see me break down. With my new counseling sessions and treatments, it was easy to feign tiredness since it was one of the side-effects mentioned by Carlisle. I definitely was not one to cry or show weakness, especially in front of other people. But bottling it up just to face the others would only make matters worse. Coming up here to think over things and cry a bit helped me to control my emotions around other people. Today I was in a particularly bad self-loathing mood.

_What had I done this time to cause all of this? Why couldn__'__t I just be good and enjoy what little happiness was thrown my way? Why did I have to screw everything up?_

"Bella?"

There was a knock on the door and Alice's voice filtered through the wood.

"Bella, you have to come to my room tonight to get ready."

I lifted my head off the damp material and checked the clock. Crap, it was the 29th. Tonight was the dance.

I had gone back to school a few days ago. I ignored the blatant stares and gossip that circled around me. Every day that passed made the whole school experience as monotonous and boring as I had first experienced. I was much better at handling group situations and the threats of panic attacks were minimal.

I couldn't believe that I had forgotten about the dance. The luminous flyers that were around school only jumped into my head now. I bit my lip when I remembered the day shopping for the dress and the day Edward, well Alice, asked me to the dance. It seemed so long ago that everything was so… perfect.

I sighed and got off the bed. "I'm coming."

Walking over to the closet, I hastily brushed back my hair with my fingertips. I walked up to the mirror and grimaced when I noticed my reflection. My face was blotchy, with pillow crease marks down both sides. My eyes were red and swollen. I tried desperately to make my face look normal again but nothing made a huge impact. Thankfully my eyes were already clearing up and I could just say that I fell asleep to explain the marks.

I pulled open the door and was met by Alice in what could only be described as her 'pre-battle' stance. She had a hairbrush in one hand and a towel in the other, ready to push me into her shower. She eyed up my appearance but didn't comment. I was then frog-marched down to her room.

I seriously debated faking an illness of some sort. Even with Carlisle around to prove me wrong, I was willing to try and get out of going to the dance by any means necessary. Two weeks ago I couldn't wait for this day, now I wanted to curl into a ball and wait for the earth to swallow me up.

I knew that tonight I had two possible scenarios; either spend a few uncomfortable, and to be honest upsetting, hours with Edward or be a third wheel to the others. I wasn't sure if Edward even remembered that tonight was the dance, he had already left twenty minutes ago and wasn't home yet.

I paid no attention to Alice's work. She pulled me out of the shower after the hot water ran out and made me snap back to reality long enough to dry myself. I was barely aware of being pushed into a chair and being assaulted by a hairdryer and curlers.

I trained one ear on the door, my heart half-hoping that Edward's Volvo would come up the driveway. The other half hoped it wouldn't.

Rose came in when Alice moved onto my make-up. She helped to pin up the curls at the back of my head while Alice powdered my face. I closed my eyes when she moved onto putting on eyeliner and mascara. They didn't open until after she had helped me into my dress.

"Bella, open your eyes now. We're finished."

I cracked my eyes open slowly. Alice and Rose stood to my right, looking both proud and awed at their work. I turned my head to look into the mirror. The dress fit me perfectly; it looked good against my pale skin and dark hair. My mask was one that could be held in my hand or up to my face. My eyes were smoky and heavily lined.

I turned away from the mirror as soon as possible. Alice darted across the room to take the rollers out of Rose's hair. Alice's hair had been slicked back elegantly sometime during my own transformation. They were both capable of applying their own make-up within ten minutes so I sat down on Alice's bed to wait for them.

Emmett's booming voice could be heard up here. He swore loudly.

"Jasper, we only have half an hour left! There's no way I'm going to be able to wash this out of my hair before we leave. Rose blow-dried my hair this morning for tonight."

Jasper laughed. "Dude, your hair is barely an inch long."

"That's what I said!"

Rose finished applying her make-up and stormed out of the room. Seconds later I saw Emmett running past the door to his room, being chased by Rose who was threatening to pour a glass of water over his precious Guitar Hero controller unless he got into the shower within ten seconds. He appeared to have what looked like an egg cracked on his head.

I sat silently on the bed, waiting for Alice to finish. Rose had quickly put on her siren-red silk dress and was now overseeing Emmett who was attempting to put on his suit.

It had been an hour and a half since Edward had left, the longest he had been gone so far.

The longest we had been apart from what I could remember.

I got off the bed and walked out of the room. I passed Jasper on my way across the hallway. He gave me a smile and walked over to wait on Alice. Walking into Edward's room I was aware that we were leaving in exactly two minutes.

I knew that what I would find would determine what scenario would happen tonight. I opened up the door to the closet and stepped inside. My heart wasn't pounding as I walked over to where Edward kept his suits and formal clothing; it seemed to slow down as if it was dying.

I ran my hand over the garment bags until I came to the dark blue one that I was looking for. I unzipped it and looked at the dark material that it revealed.

_Well at least I was used to being alone._

* * *

Being a third wheel didn't bother me. I was the type of person who could be alone but not lonely.

I plastered a forced smile on my face as we drove to the school. Alice and Jasper were in the Porsche. I was riding with Emmett and Rose in Rose's BMW. Had Edward been here… well, I was trying hard not to think about that.

"Don't worry Bells, you can dance with me," Emmett joked. I tried to smile again but it came as a grimace. Rose discreetly hit him thinking he had hurt my feelings.

Emmett and Jasper both commented on how I looked before we left. I had almost forgotten I was in a dress until I nearly caught the hem in the door when I got into the car. I was counting down the minutes until the dance was over and I could take it off.

I hadn't been the only one to notice Edward's failure to arrive. Alice looked as if she could murder someone when we drove off without him. Emmett, too, looked angry but he seemed more determined to get me to smile than cause someone bodily injury. I was thankful for him to make the effort to include me tonight but I would have probably been better off ignored.

The drive to the school was undoubtedly awkward. Rose got a call from Alice who was screaming down the phone about her '_incompetent asshole of a sibling_'. At first I thought that Rose had her cell on speaker, but then I realized that Alice was actually capable of that sound level. I pretended that I couldn't hear what Alice was saying and turned my head to face out of the window.

It was official; I had figured out that time could stand still. The dial on the dashboard told me that Emmett was driving at eighty, but the trees were flashing by at walking speed.

_Great, now I__'__m officially more of a freak than before._

I closed my eyes and focused on calming the lead sensation that was coating my throat and stomach. I hadn't eaten much today so there was a very slim chance that I would throw up.

Threading my fingers together on my lap, I began to develop paranoia. What if Edward was there? What if he had gotten another date? What would people say when I showed up alone?

A small voice asked if I could handle a situation like this _without_ him.

Could I do it? He had been with me every time I went out. He had been one of the things I focused on whenever things got too frightening. He had always been the one to calm me down whenever I got worked up.

The lead feeling in my stomach had now developed into an uncomfortable bubbling. I leaned my head against the window and hoped that I wouldn't throw up in the BMW.

"Bella, are you feeling okay?"

I heard Rose turn around in her seat. I clamped my mouth shut to minimize the risk of anything coming through it, word vomit or otherwise.

"Oh my God! Emmett, stop the car!"

"What's happened?"

The car came to a screeching halt and my eyes popped open in order to find something to hold onto. My seatbelt cut into my ribs.

"Bella? Are you okay?" Rose asked again. Both she and Emmett had turned around and were looking at me with extreme concern.

"I'm fine," I murmured, pulling my seatbelt away from my body to allow myself to breathe.

Emmett shook his head. "Bella, you're literally green. Your whole body has gone pale and you were out for a while back there. We thought you were sleeping until you started convulsing."

I looked down at my hands and noticed that they were white. My whole body seemed to be covered in a cold sweat. I shook my head, the only other time I had these things happen to me was when I was having the…

"Bella!" Rose shouted.

"No… no, no, no, no," I whimpered. The fits can't come back. They can't. I was done with all of the main treatments. They just can't come back.

Emmett started the car back up and pulled out of where we had stopped. He pulled the car sharply around to head back. Rose took out her cell and started to dial.

"You can't just go back now. I'll be fine," I argued weakly. Emmett shook his head while Rose muttered to someone on the phone.

"No, Bella. You need to see Dad straight away. Plus, you were in no fit state to go to the dance in the first place," Emmett said with more authority than I had ever heard him use.

Rose finished her conversation and flipped her cell down. "Alice and Jasper are on their way back. They just need to stop by somewhere first."

I groaned. "There is no point in all of you missing the dance because of me. Just drop me off at the house and go back."

Shaking her head, Rose spoke. "Bella, do you honestly think that we could enjoy ourselves when you are in this state? We were even debating missing the dance altogether when we found out that Edward was still MIA."

I flinched a little when she said his name. Okay he was officially the reason I hadn't been having any attacks in the past few weeks. Emmett continued to drive back to the house. His speed got us there in half the time it took us normally.

Rose opened her door and got out, slamming it unnecessarily hard behind her. Emmett seemed to want to crush something but thankfully he was smart enough to refrain from damaging the car. He opened my door for me and attempted to pull me out of the backseat. I swatted his hand away weakly and tried to get out of the car.

My shoes hit the gravel but had no grip because my legs weren't strong enough to put weight on my feet. I slowly slid forward. Time had definitely slowed down or stopped. The ground came up to meet me and all I could do was smile and greet it.

I could see Emmett's hands moving slowly out to catch me. It was almost comical, like when you see those movies when the scene slows down and you can hear the character going '_noooooooo_'.

My back hit the ground first, the force causing me to almost bounce off the ground. The movement forced my body to tilt forward slightly. My legs then came into contact with the sharp stones on the driveway. I could feel some of them cutting into my skin, breaking it in a few places and even digging deeper in others.

I knew I should feel pain, or should have at least screamed when I fell, or even gasp. Anything.

But I couldn't feel a damn thing.

It was hilarious actually. I had stones buried in my thighs, even more embedded on the surface of my skin and I may have fractured a bone or two from falling awkwardly but I couldn't feel a thing. My laughs echoed around me, bringing everything into focus. Time started back again.

"Bella!"

Rose and Emmett stood beside me, looking shocked and worried.

_Why should they look like that?_

I howled louder. My laughing sounded demented even in my ears, but that only made the situation funnier.

"What's going- Bella!"

I spotted Esme running from the house towards us, Carlisle behind her. Esme went white when she took in my appearance. She dropped to her knees beside me.

"Bella? Bella, are you okay?" Tears were forming in her eyes as she patted my hand lightly. I couldn't even answer her; all I could do was laugh.

Rose made a choking sound. Emmett looked over at Carlisle. "What's wrong with her?" he asked quietly.

Carlisle dropped down beside Esme. He glanced over my body and checked my pulse. "Bella, can you talk to me?"

_Of course I could._

I opened my mouth. Nothing but hysterical laughter came out. I snapped it shut and tried again. When I couldn't regain control, I became terrified. Carlisle asked Emmett something but his voice was too low to comprehend.

"No," Emmett replied. "It's still the same as always." He spoke with a hard voice, regretting whatever he was talking about.

Carlisle turned back to me again. "Bella, I want you to try and talk again."

Everyone looked at me expectantly. I couldn't do it. I couldn't speak. Tears rolled down my cheeks, cackling still came from my mouth.

"If you can understand me I want you to squeeze my hand, okay?" Carlisle extended his hand so it fit into mine. I gripped it tightly.

He nodded and stood up. "Emmett, help me bring her inside. We need to get her cuts checked out as soon as possible so they don't get infected."

Carlisle and Emmett pulled me up. A car came up the driveway as they brought me to the door.

"Bella! What happened?!"

Alice was beside us before Jasper had turned off the engine. She looked at Rose for an explanation before looking at me. Her face drained of color despite her make-up when she took in my hysterical laughter and tear-stained face.

I was brought up to Edward's room. Esme ran ahead to grab some old sheets to put under me so as Carlisle could fix my cuts without worrying about staining the good sheets. I was still laughing when they placed me on the bed.

"Do you know what's going on with her?" Alice asked. She somehow managed to push the large couch from the wall to beside the bed. She, Esme and Rosalie slumped into it.

"I think she is having a fit," Carlisle said bluntly. He gently held my leg up so as he could examine my cuts.

"A fit? I thought that she had to black out for a fit," Emmett said. Both he and Jasper stood at Carlisle's side, ready to assist in whatever way.

Carlisle shook his head. "There are many different types of fits and attacks. I'm seventy percent sure that I know the one she is in." He looked up at Esme, Rose and Alice on the couch. "She had cuts all up her thighs, I need you to take off her dress and put her in something that will allow me to examine them."

Within a second, Alice was in the closet. Jasper, Emmett and Carlisle left the room. Alice returned with a pair of what looked like shorts and a t-shirt.

"What happened to Bella?" Esme asked Rose. They held my body up gingerly as Alice unzipped the dress and pulled it off.

Rose shrugged. "We were going to the dance and then she just blacked out. She started convulsing but we managed to get her conscious again. When we came back, Emmett tried to help her get out but she refused and climbed out. She was on her feet for a second and then she just fell. She looked… kind of, out of it, for a moment before laughing like a maniac."

Esme nodded, pulling the t-shirt over my head and guiding my arms through the sleeves. Alice had put on the shorts and was sitting on the couch again. She glanced at the clock a few times. Rose stood up and went over to the door to allow Carlisle, Emmett and Jasper back in.

Carlisle had his leather case with him. He set it on the bed and opened it up, unraveling the rolls of scalpels, tweezers and other instruments. He pulled out a vial and began to fill a syringe.

"Bella," he said calmly, "I've done a bit a research during the past few minutes and your fit will pass easier if you are unconscious. Also it may be easier for me to fix your wounds if you are unconscious. Is it okay with you if I do that? Squeeze my hand once for yes." He put his hand in mine again and I squeezed it, wanting nothing more than this fit to pass.

Carlisle nodded and smiled at me. He pulled the silver syringe up and placed it at my arm. Once it had pierced my skin, I could feel the liquid calming me as it flowed through my blood. Within moments, I was unconscious.

* * *

**Oct 29****th**

**Edward Cullen**

* * *

Ever since Charlie had called me, only two things ran through my head: protect Bella, and either get Phil arrested, or killed. I honestly didn't care which option became reality just as long as Bella was no longer in danger.

Everyday I drove to Charlie's house. He had been running daily patrols and had managed to increase the search warrant for Phil from wanted for questioning to wanted arrested. We mainly discussed anything that they had found out during the day. Sometimes nothing happened, sometimes something happened.

As I drove to Charlie's house I couldn't help but feel that I was forgetting something. I looked down and checked that I had my jacket. My keys were hanging in the ignition, my wallet was in my pocket and my cell was on the seat beside me. Whatever I had forgotten couldn't be terribly important since I had remembered everything that I needed.

I pulled outside Charlie's house, wondering whether they had found anything today. Recently they had gotten security camera footage from Phil's workplace and apartment garage. At one stage they managed to uncover a few phone conversations that he had from a phone in work.

Putting my cell in my pocket, I got out of my car and ran to the door; it was still slightly drizzling from the downpour earlier. Knocking on the door, the thought that I had forgotten something still grew in my mind.

Charlie's deputy opened the door. He held a finger up to his mouth to tell me to keep silent. Voices could be heard from the sitting room and kitchen. As we passed the door to the sitting room, it became clear that Charlie was not in that room. I was led to the kitchen. Charlie was on the phone.

"… we have them here. Yes, yes we will begin our questioning soon. Okay."

He hung up the phone and looked at me. His eyes were triumphant.

"Mark, shut the door."

Once the door was closed Charlie sat down in one of the three chairs in the kitchen. Mark took one of the other chairs.

"What's going on?" I asked.

Charlie grinned and pointed to the empty chair. "Sit down first and then I'll tell you."

I sat down but glanced between Mark and Charlie. Charlie sighed at my paranoid expression. He straightened himself up and began to speak.

"We were talking to the Seattle Downtown Station today and they told us that two people from Phil's workplace came to them to report suspicious behavior. The Chief in the station called me and sent them down here so both of us – us being the Seattle team, and our department - can question them. Also I have been calling the Phoenix station today and they sent up one of Phil's old co-workers so we can ask him a couple of questions as well."

I smiled. "So that means we have more information?"

Charlie nodded. "We can see about when he comes and goes, what he's like in work, what his supposed hobbies are… We've basically struck gold."

"We should go in now," Mark said quietly. Charlie got up and walked us into the sitting room. Three men and a woman sat in the small room. One of the men was an officer. Another was obviously from Phoenix since his skin was at least three shades darker than the other man and woman. Charlie took a seat beside the other officer while Mark and I stood due to the lack of seating.

"Okay, let's get started," Charlie said.

Ten minutes in to the questioning, my cell vibrated in my pocket. 'Mom' flashed across the screen. I pressed 'reject' and put my cell back into my pocket. Mom was always calling me so I didn't think much of the call. If it was something important then she could ring again.

The officer from Seattle began the questioning first. Charlie sat back and listened to the answers. My cell rang again. I silently went out to the hall and shut the door behind me.

"What?" I snapped.

"Where the hell are you?!" Alice screamed.

"Nowhere dangerous, unknown or of any importance to you so what do you want?"

Alice sighed into the phone, obviously frustrated.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Nothing's wrong," she replied but I knew something was not right.

"Then what's going on?"

Alice went silent for a moment before screaming once again. "'What's going on?' You're honestly asking me that? _Think_ about what you may be forgetting, Edward."

I frowned. "What am I forgetting?"

"I cannot believe you just asked me that. Goodbye, Edward. Hopefully you'll remember before you screw everything up."

She hung up. I held the phone to my ear for a few moments, wondering what she was going on about. I shook my head and went back into the sitting room, knowing that whatever I was forgetting would probably come back to me later.

The officer from Seattle was still questioning when I walked in. He continued for what seemed like thirty minutes. Charlie then launched into his questions. I listened carefully to everything that was said, trying to commit it to memory.

My cell rang once again. I sighed and stepped outside again, noticing it was my father calling me.

"Yes?" I asked curtly.

"Edward, where the hell are you?"

I was shocked by his angry tone. "I'm at Charlie's house. Why? What's going on?"

I could hear Dad trying to control his breathing, something he always did when he was upset or angry at something.

"Dad? What's happened?"

He sighed. "I think it would be best if you came home before I told you, I don't want you driving after you find out."

I glanced towards the sitting room door. "But I have to stay here. I'll come home-"

"Edward!" Dad roared. "Bella's after having a fit!"

I froze. Bella had a fit? Was she okay? How did it happen? What-

"Just get back here as soon as you can. Drive carefully," Dad said, interrupting my thoughts.

I snapped my cell shut and walked over to the front door. I grabbed my jacket and ran swiftly out. All I cared about was seeing Bella.

I pushed the speed on my Volvo to new limits. The trees and other vehicles past in blurs. I paid no attention to anything. When I arrived home, everyone was in the dining room, sitting around the table. Mom, Alice and Rose looked severely shaken. Emmett looked as though he wanted to pound something to dust. Jasper and Dad looked worried but calmer than the others.

Alice glanced over when I walked in and launched herself at me. She began screeching and pummeling whatever body parts she could reach. Jasper ran over and pulled her off me.

"How could you do this to her?" she sobbed.

I stood still, shocked by what she was accusing me of. "How could I do what?"

Emmett growled. "You honestly want to know what you've been doing?"

I nodded.

"Why don't we start with you ignoring us all? How about the way you've left us in the dark as to where you've been, and what you've been doing? You've barely spoken to Bella the past two weeks. Do you have any idea how upset she's been? Every time you leave, she goes upstairs and cries. And to put the cherry on top of all of this, you completely forgot about what was happening today."

I was shaking now with anger. "What? What was happening today?"

Mom shook her head and looked at me. She stood up and pulled something from her lap. It was some tattered, green material. She shook it out and I finally realized what it was; Bella's dress.

The dance.

"I couldn't have forgotten," I muttered, checking my watch. Sure enough the little dial told me it was the twenty-ninth.

I sank to the floor as reality hit me; I had hurt Bella. My head snapped up when I remembered one very important detail.

"The fit. What happened to Bella?"

Dad sighed. He looked at me and must have seen the desperation in my eyes because he launched straight into telling me the truth.

"Bella had a very complex fit. She was conscious during it. She had small convulsions during the ride to the dance but Emmett and Rosalie managed to get her conscious again. During her fit, she could understand what we were saying, hear us perfectly, and even acknowledge what we were asking by squeezing our hand. But she wasn't exactly… _there_. She was laughing hysterically until we gave her an injection to make her unconscious."

"Why was she laughing?" I asked quietly.

Dad let out a deep breath. "Her mind has been through a great deal of stress recently. She built up security since she moved here and, well, because of… you, her mind has been pushed into anxiety and fear just like before. When you didn't show up today," he gritted his teeth as he spoke, "her mind automatically shut down all stress areas. That's what made her laugh."

"Will she be okay?" I whispered.

"She should be okay but I have to warn you, she might not be as trusting. She should be conscious soon."

I nodded and swallowed hard. "Can I go up to see her?"

Dad glanced around him. Alice was still glaring at me, as was Emmett. Rose and Esme were both staring at the table. Jasper was pacing around the room. Once it was confirmed that only Alice seemed to have a murderous look in her eyes, Dad nodded.

I walked upstairs quickly, taking the stairs two at a time. I pulled at my hair when I reached my door, wondering what state Bella could be in. I turned the handle slowly, pushing the door open tentatively.

The light was off, only the moon lighting the room. I half expected it to spill over Bella on the bed but the light came in at an angle which made the light shine in the opposite direction to the bed. I could make out Bella's form on the bed. Turning on the light, I closed the door and made my way over to Bella.

She appeared to be sleeping but I wasn't sure, she could still be unconscious. Her legs were covered by the sheets but I could see that they were bulked up with something else. I ran my hands across the bed until they reached the top of the sheets. I slowly pulled the sheets down. Bella's legs were bandaged up, her left arm in a temporary cast. It made me feel sick that Bella had been hurt. She stirred and rolled over, facing me. Her forehead creased.

I sat down carefully beside her on the bed. Reaching over, I brushed her hair off of her face. Her face relaxed at my touch. A feeling of relief passed through me, and I bent down and pressed my lips against her cheek. The corners of her mouth twitched. I paused and cautiously dragged my lips across her cheek until they came to the corners of her mouth. Very carefully, I kissed her.

At first, she didn't respond. I was thrilled that I was finally kissing Bella but the real joy could only be unlocked if she was kissing me back. Then suddenly she made a murmuring noise and her lips started to move. My heart leapt and I held her face. Her mouth opened slightly.

And she screamed.

* * *

**A/N: DO NOT KILL ME! I know that you have every right to be mad at me but this is basically the start of things to come. I didn****'****t even plan for this chapter to go so****…**** sadly/depressingly/badly pick your favorite. Blame my iPod if you must, I turned it on and it started to play the single most depressing song I have so the idea just jumped into my head and everything else for the future chapters just fell into place after that idea.**

**On a brighter note: over 6,000 words, 10 pages!**

**REVIEW!! Please I really want to get close to the 300 mark.**


	17. Christmas Spirit

**A/N:** I decided after various death threats and random curses to write more, lol just kidding, but that is part of it…

Just some random ramblings before I start: The Cab are officially my new favourite band, Patrick Stump's random verses on some of their songs are cool. Woo! I'm going to see FOB in 2 weeks.

Reviews, reviews… you didn't come anywhere near the unreal count of 40 (I was on painkillers and sick, what do you expect me to write?), but you did give me over 24.

* * *

**Thanks to:**

Shining Eclipse

twilight-is-lovee

Breeze.x.x

sovoyita

EC4me

F-Clearwater

TwilightNerd

Marygrace

ShatteredLoveBrokenDreams

bearhug946

Xx EdwardLova xX

friscofilly _(I think you might have damaged your keyboard by smashing 'MORE MORE MORE' into it)_

bloodredeclipse

InLustWithEC

jadesabre75

ericca.xx

Superhinata

TwilightLover15

kms1979

nicole036

Kari-Jani

Luvntwilight

The Indigo Spirit

Heartless Moon

Team Renesmee _(The condition happened to a friend of a friend and I looked up a lot of the rest on medical sites. As far as I can tell, Bella's fits can last anything from ten minutes to two hours because of the severity of her condition. Her epilepsy is only minor but with PTSD and the fact she is prone to panic attacks, the seizures are intensified.)_

**Thanks to** _Shining Eclipse _**for being my beta**

* * *

**One amazing thing I realised after reading your reviews: I HAVE CAUSED THE IMPOSSIBLE, you all hate Edward Cullen. **If you don't believe me, go back and read all of the '_edward really is such a poo face_', '_I AM EXTREMLY ANGRY AT EDWARD_', '_UHG! WHY IS EDWARD SO STUPID!_', _'Growls Jerk_.', comments… Seriously I thought it was impossible for Edward Cullen to be hated, but I have somehow caused it.

**Btw: As you know, I'm Irish and all we celebrate here after Halloween is Christmas so I can't really throw in any detailed references to Thanksgiving or anything.**

* * *

**Dec 20****th**

**Bella Swan**

* * *

I honestly think it's amazing how your emotions end up dictating how time travels around you. If you were to ask someone how fast time passes, they would answer "one second, two seconds, three…". If you were to ask me, I would say "in lurches when I'm happy, it drags when I'm depressed, but it flies by unnoticed when I'm dead inside".

That's how it's been for the past few months. Time either drags by, or passes so quickly that I don't realize I haven't eaten in days or I had an appointment last Thursday but forgot to go. Sometimes I hope it would drag by, it means Charlie doesn't get scared.

He came up last week, almost exploding from frustration. He asked me something about when I last had eaten. I simply answered "I have no idea". His face went a strange shade of purple before he stormed out.

Every hour, my alarm clock goes off. It was a suggestion by my psychiatrist, to help me understand the speed of time. Every three hours and forty-five minutes, Charlie drops a plate of food outside my door. One of my own suggestions, I can't be bothered to keep track of my meals.

"Bells? I'm decorating the tree; do you want to come down?"

I pulled my face out of the permanent crease in my pillow and stared at the door. Decorating the tree seemed like a happy task. It was too bad I wasn't happy.

"I think I'll just stay here," I shouted down. I rolled onto my back and surveyed my surroundings. I had a habit to do this once a week, preferably on a Saturday.

My room has become my hovel so to say, except that I keep it meticulously clean. No clothes on the ground, no books strewn across the desk, no papers cluttering the bin. When Charlie came up here a few weeks ago to see why I was here, he was surprised to see my room like this. He muttered something about 'all personality drained out of her'. I find this funny; I feel empty, therefore my room is empty. It reflects me perfectly at the moment.

I smiled at this. Being empty has suited me so far. I didn't have to go to school. I didn't have to leave the house … the psychiatrist visits me every two days. And Charlie doesn't have to worry about me being in any danger if I don't even walk out the front door or go down the stairs.

The thumping of Charlie's feet on the stairs gave me enough time to sit up. He cracked the door open and checked hesitantly on me. Once he was certain I wasn't changing, he pushed it open fully. He looked sad. It hurt to see him like this.

"C'mon Bells. It's almost Christmas, our first Christmas together since your mother left," he choked a little when he mentioned Mom. "I want you to come down; it's not good for you to be up here twenty-four-seven."

He sat down on the edge of my bed, looking at me until he got uncomfortable and looked down. I felt upset that Charlie mentioned that this is our first Christmas together since I was seven.

He sighed and stood up. "If you don't want to, you don't-"

"No," I said, weakly pushing myself off the bed. "I'll come down."

Charlie's face brightened considerably. I smiled.

"Sure it would probably be a good thing to have me help. You're hopeless at decorating anything." I joked.

We walked downstairs. I hadn't been down in a while. Charlie had pinned notices onto the wall beside the door, reminding him when my next appointment was.

The sitting room was packed with boxes. The tree stood proudly in the corner of the room. It wasn't large by any standards, but it still dominated the small room. I picked my way carefully around the boxes and stood beside Charlie.

"Lights first," I said to myself, reaching for the box.

Charlie frowned. "I always put the decorations first."

I laughed, it sounded weak even in my own ears. "Haven't you noticed over the years that it's hard to thread the wires through all of the decorations?"

He smiled. "I guess my logic is off when it comes to this type of thing."

We worked happily for an hour. Once the lights and decorations were up, Charlie searched around the empty boxes for something.

"Shoot. Bella can you go into the kitchen and grab the box on the table?"

I stopped adjusting the lights and nodded. Charlie started to hum carols when I left. He hadn't been this light-hearted in a while.

The kitchen had changed slightly. Pots and pans filled the sink, take-out boxes overflowed from the bin. I spotted the small box labeled 'star' that sat on the table. Picking it up, I turned and started towards the door. A large pad of paper beside the phone caught my eye. Upon closer inspection I realized it wasn't a pad, but possibly a hundred sheets fixed together.

On it Charlie had written dates and times, starting with earlier today. _13:53 20__th__ December_, _09:35 20__th__ December, 21:12 19__th__ December…_ Flicking through, the pages were filled with dates and times. Sometimes there were possibly five or six recordings on a single day.

"Bella?"

I spun around; Charlie was leaning against the door frame. "What are you looking at?" he asked.

I held up the pages and his face went white. He stepped forward and tried to take it out of my hands.

"It's nothing, honey, put it down and come back to finish the tree," he said coaxingly.

I continued flicking through the pages.

_15:47 14__th__ November._

_10:19 1__st__ November._

It continued until October. I read some notes that had been put on some of the earlier entries.

"_Call back", "Asked to speak …", "Pleaded to come and see", "threatened to show up"._

The notes got more detailed as I went to the first few entries. Mainly most of them were the same as the later ones, just longer.

I reached the first page and noted that there were seventeen calls on that day.

"What is this a record of?" I asked quietly.

Charlie shuffled uncomfortably beside me and took the pages from me, putting them beside the phone.

"Nothing," he answered.

I nodded. He had a right to get away with vague answers, since I had said barely anything over the past few months. I handed him the star and grimaced at the dishes and rubbish.

"I had better start cleaning if we want to use this kitchen again."

I emptied the sink until I could easily wash the load that was in it. Charlie walked slowly down the hall to the sitting room. I settled into the comforting task of methodically washing and drying the dishes. It felt so familiar. _Rinse…scrub…rinse…dry…rinse…scrub…_

I was surprised that I hadn't done this sooner; helping Charlie downstairs. He obviously couldn't cook properly judging by the burnt remains on the pans and the amount of take-out cartons. I calculated that there must have been about a month and a half of dinners in the bin and another week of pans in the sink.

I was nearly finished when Charlie returned. He smiled approvingly at my work and gathered up all of the rubbish to bring outside. The phone rang just as he was opening the door. I stared at it but did not move. I knew that someone was on the other end and I wasn't able to speak to anyone else yet.

Charlie dropped the rubbish and ran to get it.

"Yes?" he answered gruffly. "That worked, yes… Fine… I'll pass it on when the time's right… Goodbye."

"Who was that?" I asked, trying to make conversation.

"No-one," Charlie replied.

Instead of going to pick up the rubbish like I expected him to, he went over to the pages and proceeded to write something on them. I stayed where I was until he had gone out with the rubbish. Once he was out of sight, I glanced over at the pages. Whoever just called must have been the person Charlie was recording.

I was insanely curious to see what he had written. I could see that he had made a note after the date. Sighing, I dropped the plate I was scrubbing and walked over to the phone. Scanning the page, I reached the last entry.

_19:36 20__th__ December: Says 'Merry Christmas'_.

I frowned at the page. Charlie had said _"I'll pass it on when the time's right"_, could this be the message? But why would he wait to pass on something like this? A small voice commanded me to walk away from the page and to stop thinking about it. I happily complied, whatever 'this' was, it was pulling something distant and frightening from within me.

* * *

**Dec 20****th**

**Edward Cullen**

* * *

"Deck the halls with boughs of holly! _Fa-la-la-la-la LA-LA LA-LA! _Uhm … _duh duh-duh duh-duh, duh-duh-duh_. _Fa-la-la-la-la LA-LA LA-LA!"_

Emmett's voice boomed through the house at nine in the morning. Nine in the flipping morning. If I hadn't been asleep I would have cheerfully beaten him to death, humming 'Silent Night'.

"What the fuck!? It's not even daylight!"

Alice must be hung-over. Usually her and Emmett storm through the house screaming carols at the top of their lungs during the week leading up to Christmas. Now she was shrieking profanities while moaning from her apparently throbbing head and lack of coordination.

My door was thrown open and the irritated pixie stomped in. She slammed the door behind her and groaned when it shut noisily. She looked at me and grimaced.

"You look _terrible_, when was the last time you slept?"

I shrugged. "Whenever Dad gave me those pills that time."

Alice slouched over to my bed and sat gingerly on it. It was perfectly made from when I last changed the sheets. I turned back to my laptop and stared at the screen. Sighing, it dawned on me that this may be the only human contact I would be able to handle today.

"When did you get home last night?" I asked.

Alice lay down on the bed and covered her eyes. "Well the party ended at two but I got home at four. Emmett was meant to drive me home but he ended up at Rose's. Jazz walked me to his house and we had to wait until he sobered up enough to drive."

"'Sobered up', yeah right," I muttered sarcastically. "How come Emmett's not hung-over?"

"Dad made him promise to only have two beers since he was meant to drive me home."

I nodded. The clock on the screen told me it was 9:25. I would probably call again soon.

"Has he said anything about her?" Alice asked quietly from the bed.

"No, nothing." I answered flatly.

I had been calling regularly ever since… well ever since I last seen Bella. At first Charlie yelled about how depressed Bella was. After a few weeks he became sympathetic, as if I could help if Bella was able to see me again. I think he recognized a bit of himself in me; fighting endlessly to see someone who wouldn't even say your name. Recently he had realized that only Bella could bring herself around.

Dad kept in contact with the psychiatrist that had been assigned to her after Dad decided it would only be harder for her if he continued.

Everything that was passed to Dad was passed down to me. I needed every small piece of information about Bella; I lived off the knowledge that she was still alive.

"I wonder…" Alice murmured.

"What?" I said, snapping my head around to see her.

She shook her head but looked thoughtful. She muttered to herself and stood up gingerly, her balance looked as reliable as Emmett's cooking skills. Once she had left the room, I slumped further into my seat, knowing that I would most likely be alone for the rest of the day.

I didn't crave anyone's attention at home. I wanted to see Bella, to talk to her, and that made me completely and utterly unsociable. When I was around my family, I thought of her; of what she could be doing at that very second. I was snappy, moody and angry when I was around other people.

But I needed to talk to someone in the day. It was unhealthy to not have any human contact. I gladly took what little chance I was given.

The screen before me turned a dark blue and the screensaver started to flash. I jolted the mouse to return it to the search engine.

This is all I did during the day, stare at Google. It was pathetic but I couldn't do anything else. All of my books and CD's reminded me of Bella. Every time I tried to play a piece on the piano, it quickly turned to something dark and sinister or sad and lonely. I didn't want to depress or annoy my family further by playing something like that anyway.

I jumped up when the screen told me it was 9:33. I grabbed my cell from under my bed and quickly turned it on. I waited impatiently for it to turn on. Pressing the speed-dial number, I held it up to my ear and listened to the dial-tone.

"She's not even awake yet." Charlie's voice was rough but I welcomed it, he was the last part of Bella I could connect with.

I let out a sigh of relief knowing that she was okay today.

"Did she get to sleep last night?" I asked.

Charlie sighed. "It's still the same; she's taking the pills every night now because of the insomnia."

My jaw clenched. Bella had been suffering from insomnia for two months now. She had been through so much, and now she was suffering from depression and insomnia. And there was nothing I could do unless she asked to see me.

I cleared my throat and head before I spoke.

"Is she… I mean, does she show any… reaction to the holidays?"

Charlie sighed again. "No, I don't even think she realizes Christmas is 5 days away."

"Okay, well if anything happens-"

"Call you, I know. Try and have a good day, kid. You're not doing yourself any favors by worrying over Bella every minute of the day."

"I'll try. Bye"

I snapped the phone shut and slumped onto the bed. Another regular morning routine: find out Bella was still the same and wait until I could call again.

I sat for what could have been days; time didn't make any sense anymore. Finally, when the scent of lunch wafted through the closed door, I sat up and walked towards the door.

My clock said it was 13:32. I would call again after lunch.

"… well it's your own fault if you broke your bed. You shouldn't have been jumping on it."

"But, Mom. What am I meant to do? Bounce on the bed or your couch?"

Emmett and Mom sat at opposite sides of the table, arguing again over the third bed Emmett had damaged this month. Dad and Alice sat at the counter, avoiding what could turn into a full scale war if Emmett threw a tantrum.

"You bounce on my couch and you're getting an eviction notice. Do you know how long it took me to find that couch?"

Mom was pointing her fork at Emmett, giving him the hated 'that couch' speech.

"It might be a good idea to grab the plate and go," Dad muttered as I reached over to grab my food.

Mom and Emmett continued to bicker. Alice pressed her cheek against the counter and closed her eyes. "Make them stop," she pleaded.

Dad looked at her sympathetically and got up. He rummaged in the drawers until he pulled out the three most used packets in the house, used to make Emmett's Cure. It was the only thing to cure a hangover and was created when, after many attempts to mull his throbbing head, Emmett shoved whatever he could find into a blender and drank it.

He handed the glass of orange liquid over to Alice and she gulped it down in three mouthfuls. Mom and Emmett had stopped arguing but were staring at each other menacingly. I sighed and grabbed my plate, staying down here would only make me aggravated.

I slouched up the stairs and sat in my room, slowly chewing on my lunch. My cell taunted me from the floor. Once I had finished, I grabbed it and dialed.

"Still the same, Edward."

I sat on my chair and ran my hand through my hair. Would there ever be a change?

"Is she awake?"

"Yeah, but she's still in her room. I don't know what to do with her. She should be down here, helping me with the tree. She used to love Christmas, remember when you and her made that star in Kindergarten? The two of you swapped it every year…"

He trailed off and I was left with memories of a time when everything seemed so simple and straightforward.

"Why don't you ask her to help you decorate the tree? She shouldn't drift through Christmas without decorating the tree," I said, hoping he would ask her.

"That's actually a good idea. Thanks. I should go, her lunch is ready. Bye"

The dial tone echoed in my ear. I itched to ring again later, to see if she would say yes.

I smiled when I remembered the star. We had spent a week on it. She had made me take it the first year; I made her promise to have it the next year. We alternated each year until she left. I wanted her to take it with her but she argued that it would be wasted if it came with her, because there was only her and her mom.

I gave the star back to Charlie once the first Christmas without Bella passed, hoping that she would take it when he went to visit her during the summer. I remember that during the Christmas without her, I used to stare at the star every evening, hoping that Bella would turn up. I smiled ruefully; I was eight years old and naïve enough to believe in wishing stars.

I slumped into the chair and started my Google watch again. I would probably call again this evening.

Hours passed unevenly. Emmett and Alice stomped up and down the hall, shouting various carols and songs, even having enough cheer to make up their own crude lyrics to go with some of them.

Six o'clock came and went. I wanted to wait until eight but my hand started to twitch after half seven. I gave in minutes later and grabbed my cell.

"Yes?"

"Did the tree idea work?" I held my breath until Charlie answered.

"That worked, yes."

He was being very blunt. I wondered if she was with him…

"How is she?"

"Fine," he answered simply, she must be with him.

"Could you do something for me? Just… tell her 'Merry Christmas'."

He sighed. "I'll pass it on when the time's right."

"Okay, bye."

"Goodbye."

I shut my cell and tossed it lightly onto my desk. Alice ran down the hall, past my door. Walking over to my door, I opened it just as she reached the stairs. She was pulling on her jacket and had her keys in her mouth.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

She spun around to face me and took her keys out of her mouth to talk.

"Jasper's," she said too quickly. "His aunt just took Rose out to do some shopping and he wants me to help him wrap some presents."

I nodded but doubted her excuse. She pushed her arm through its sleeve and took off again. I waited until she had closed the garage door before following her. Wherever she was going, it wasn't Jasper's house. He was in Port Angeles with Emmett doing their 'last minute Christmas shopping' ritual.

I looked out the kitchen window before I walked into the garage. Alice's Porsche turned right out of our drive, towards the opposite edge of town. The only places that were in that direction were the school and Bella's house.

I froze and glanced back to my room, the small box that I had hidden in my closet calling to me. I came to the conclusion that this may be the only chance to do this. I ran back to my room, grabbed the box and a coat before running into my Volvo.

I didn't bother turning on the heater, I just gunned it out of the garage and down the drive. Within minutes, I was at the end of Bella's street. I spotted Alice in the distance, getting out of her car. She walked tentatively up to the front door and knocked. I sat in my car and watched.

A pool of light spilled across the porch as the door opened. I watched Alice talking to Charlie before walking inside.

How did she get in? I had begged for months to see Bella, and she just turned up and Charlie welcomed her in.

I opened my door and swung my legs out, deciding that I should just drop the present outside the front door and leave.

The ice crunched under my feet as I walked down the sidewalk. I glanced at the house and looked in the window. The sitting room curtains hadn't been drawn and I could see Alice and Charlie. Charlie sat down in his chair and turned his attention to the game on the TV. Alice reached towards something on the couch. She hugged the person.

My breath caught as I took in Bella. Her hair hung lanky and straight over her shoulders. She was slumped forward, as if she couldn't hold up her own weight. When she pulled away from Alice, I gasped. Her face was almost shrunken, her eyes were dead. She smiled at Alice.

I watched as she and Alice sat on the couch, chatting animatedly to each other. Bella looked at something in the corner and stared at it. I shifted to the other side of the window so I could see what she was looking at. Alice looked at the tree and pointed. Bella nodded to whatever Alice had said. She got up and reached towards the top of the tree, taking down the star.

Bella walked back to the couch and held the star carefully, staring at it intently. I was desperate to know what she was saying, what she was thinking.

The front door opened in front of me. Charlie peeked out at stared at me. I jumped when he coughed at me. He motioned for me to be silent. I edged away from the window and walked towards him.

"I just came to drop this off," I gestured towards the box in my hands.

Charlie shook his head and smiled sadly. He opened the door and stood back to let me in. I gaped at him. He ran a shaky hand through his balding head and laughed angrily.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you, Edward. You have to see it for yourself," he sighed. "I don't think you're going to like this at all but you might as well see it now rather than later."

I frowned. He led me into the sitting room. I stepped carefully into the room, keeping my eyes on the ground.

"Edward?" Alice asked, surprised.

I looked at her; she was frowning but she attempted to smile at me. Her eyes were scared though. I took a deep breath and looked past her, to Bella.

She was frowning too, staring at me. She wasn't screaming or crying, but she wasn't smiling or laughing either.

"Hello, Bella," I murmured.

She smiled at me. It wasn't a bright smile like the ones I was used to from before. "Hello, Edward, is it?"

My mouth fell open. Was she joking? Did she want to hurt me?

Alice started to speak.

"Yes, Bella, this is my brother Edward. Why don't we leave him and Charlie to talk while we go back to what we talking about before."

Bella nodded and smiled again at me, politely.

I sat in the chair beside Charlie; he looked at me with pity in his eyes.

Did she forget who I was? Was she trying to push me out of her life completely?

"Anyway, I pulled this out of the box and, I don't know, something about it just felt so… strange. As if I had it in a past life or something," Bella said.

I gulped.

She had forgotten about me.

Alice threw me a pointed glance and began to reply to Bella.

"Maybe someone should try and help you remember."

I clenched my fist. I had to be that person. I would make myself that person.

"What do you have there, Edward?" Alice asked.

I jumped and remembered the present in my hand.

"This, yeah, I got it for Bella," I said, trying to brush it off.

Bella smiled at me. "You got me a present even though I don't know you?"

I shrugged. "I figured that from what Alice keeps saying about you, we would get along great."

I passed the box to Bella and watched as she opened it.

"Oh! It's so pretty!"

She took out the bracelet and held it up to examine it. The heart shaped locket spun as she turned it.

"Thank you so much," she beamed at me. I smiled, happy to see she was smiling but sad that she still couldn't remember me.

"Anyway, Edward we should be getting back," Alice said, standing up. She pulled me towards the door, saying goodbye to Charlie and Bella.

Once we were outside, Alice turned to face me.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that Edward," she said.

I shrugged. "I guess this is better than if she hated me. I have a second shot here."

Alice nodded. "Was that the locket you got inscribed?" she asked, trying to change the subject slightly.

"Yeah, it's Grandma Liz's old one. Bella used to love it when she was younger. Esme promised me that one day she could have it so…" I trailed off.

We reached Alice's Porsche and I went to walk back to my Volvo.

"What did you get engraved in it?"

I continued walking. "Just something I remembered from when we were younger."

And I hoped that Bella would somehow remember it too.

* * *

**A/N: Do you know how hard it is to sing 'Deck the halls…' and count the 'falalala's??**

**Lol the Cure is real and you do not want to know what's in it… it works though on my friend.**

**Before I get bombarded with questions, I'll explain Bella's 'existence' in the start of the chapter.**

Because of the PTSD and everything, her brain automatically linked Edward with happiness and recovering from her mother's murder and her abuse.

In the last chapter, her brain shut down all pain receptors (emotional and physical) in an attempt to block the hurt that came from Edward's change (and forgetting the dance).

When he came back and kissed her, her mind was fighting to keep all of the pain from erupting out. She screamed to get him away from her because his presence was causing her mind to go into turmoil. She wanted to keep kissing him but he was digging up painful memories.

Now her brain has completely cut out Edward in an attempt to smother her pain. This causes her to appear lifeless and depressed.

As I said in earlier chapters, when she's depressed she thinks she appears normal, that everything she does is expected. She doesn't express emotions. Her thoughts are short and non-descriptive because she doesn't feel anything.

Anyone who doesn't know anything about depression might find this confusing but anyone who has suffered from it or knows someone who suffers from it will understand completely.

**Reviews?**


	18. Remember

**A/N:** (insert high pitched scream here)

NEW! TRAILER! GAH!

Woo! The Fall Out Boy concert was so cool.

This chapter was harder to write than others because my information is limited (all of the other chapters were based on someone my friend knows who suffered from PTSD). I can't find out very much about what should happen now, only what will happen next.

* * *

**Spider-monkey themed cookie to:**

twilight-is-lovee

bearhug946

riversd14

Luvntwilight

friscofilly

sovoyita

EllaAngel

nikkerz

bloodredeclipse

jadesabre75

ericca.xx

TwilightLover15

GinnyW 31

F-Clearwater

Team Renesmee

Horsefreak01

Xx EdwardLova xX (your quote has a point but she has completely forgot about his existence here, there would be no meaning to life if she remembered him but if she forgot then….)

nnck01

Ivory76 (To answer your question, Edward always overreacts when it comes to protecting Bella. He understood that she was in danger and automatically tried everything he could to keep her safe, even if that meant forgetting about talking to her and going to the dance)

* * *

**Thanks to **_Shining Eclipse_** for taking the time to go over whatever crap I spew out today lol**

* * *

"_But I believe the world is burning to the ground_

_Oh well, I guess we__'__re gonna find out_

_Let__'__s see how far we__'__ve come_

_Let__'__s see how far we__'__ve come_

_Well I believe it all is coming to an end_

_Oh well, I guess we__'__re gonna pretend_

_Let__'__s see how far we__'__ve come_

_Let__'__s see how far we__'__ve come"_

"How Far We've Come" by Matchbox 20

* * *

**Dec 21st**

**Charlie Swan**

* * *

I spent most of the night on the phone with Carlisle. I had to know what was going on with Bella.

Forgetting something was okay, like leaving your jacket in the hall. But forgetting everything; that was another story all together.

Everything was… well not okay, but bearable, until she pulled the star out of the box. Before that, she never said his name, never talked about him, never asked about him. I tried not to push her, but there were many times when I wanted to ask her if she knew who Edward even was anymore.

When she pulled the star out of the box, she stared at it for almost an hour. To say I freaked out would be an understatement. I almost combusted. At first, she just stared at it, observing it in her hands. Then she looked as if she was about to cry. Lastly she started shaking violently. That was the hardest part to watch. Throughout the entire thing, she didn't make a sound. I almost called an ambulance when she finally pulled out of whatever fit she was having.

After that, she…

"Mom?"

Bella's 'dream' voice shot through me like a sword. She never talked about Renée in her sleep, ever. I walked carefully over to her door and cracked it open.

She was lying on her bed in her 'defensive' position, curled in a ball with her sheets wrapped tightly around her. When she stayed with me in the past, when she was suffering with him and Renée, she would always sleep like this. Edward and I were told by Carlisle that this was her subconscious trying to protect her as much as possible. When she started to get better a few weeks ago, she started to sleep splayed out on the bed, more relaxed.

I swallowed and averted my gaze to the rest of her room. It was still the same, everything neat and organized. Not a thing out of place, no clothes strewn on the floor, no pictures tacked onto her notice board. There was nothing to suggest that a teenager lived her. Even her personal items like her books and CD's were packed into boxes inside her closet.

I backed away from her room and closed the door. I had to talk to someone again.

I walked downstairs and slumped into the kitchen, turning on the light on my way. The kitchen brightened up and I cringed when I saw how much work we had to do to clean up the boxes. I almost groaned out loud when the clock told me it was four in the morning. Who would be up at four in the morning?

I was dialing the number before my brain even kicked in.

"Charlie? What's wrong?"

I chuckled nervously. Okay, maybe calling at four in the morning would cause him to be concerned…

"Sorry, I didn't mean to alarm you, it's just that… I couldn't exactly get to sleep and you're the only person who I know is awake at this hour and, well-"

"You wanted someone to talk to?" Edward laughed quietly.

I smiled to myself. "Basically, yes."

I couldn't help but see myself in Edward. He reminded me so much of myself when I was younger. There was a part of me – a small part of me – that had some hatred for Edward. For what he did to my Bella. But his more redeeming points overshadowed that one mistake.

He was well suited to Bella and I knew that they would end up married sometime in the next ten years, preferably towards the end of that time frame, but still…

"Is she sleeping okay?" he asked.

I sighed. "She's back to the defensive position. I don't know what's wrong with her. And she called out for her mother in her sleep."

I heard Edward's sharp intake of breath. Hopefully he won't overreact… After a few tense seconds, he spoke.

"Carlisle says that he will call some specialists from LA and Chicago in the morning to see if they have any knowledge about the condition. At the moment he's confused over what has happened with Bella. Amnesia is not associated with PTSD."

I froze up. Amnesia? Wasn't that were you forgot everything?

"Hang on," I spluttered. "She remembers her name, she remembers me. She can't have amnesia."

"I know but that's the closest explanation to what she is suffering from now. She may not have full-blown memory loss but part of her brain might be suffering from it," he explained calmly. I could hear a voice in the background and shuffling.

"_Who__'__s that? Is it Charlie?_"

I recognized the voice as Esme. I hadn't seen her in a while. The crackling noise from the other line alerted me to the fact that the phone was changing hands.

"Charlie?"

I grinned at the familiar, soothing voice. Esme was like a second mother to Bella when she was little.

"Hey, Esme."

"I only just heard what happened earlier. I'm so sorry."

I pushed some boxes out of a chair to the floor and sat. "Thanks, hopefully we'll be able to sort this out soon."

"Yes, hopefully. I just feel like there could be more we can do now. I mean, maybe this might help Bella."

I frowned. "Help her? How?"

"Well, since she can't remember anything about Edward, it might help them to build up their relationship more again so that when she does get her memory back, she might trust him more and be able to move on from her demons."

"Carlisle was also saying that her memory loss may also help minimize the trauma caused by her past."

I nodded, contemplating what she had just told me. A noise upstairs told me that Bella was up for the day. I glanced at the clock and was surprised when I noticed it was half past six.

"I have to go, Bella's up," I said hastily.

"Okay, goodbye Charlie."

"Bye."

I put the phone back and groaned when the mess of boxes greeted me again. I had been in the cluttered kitchen for over two hours and I completely forgot that there was an hour's work to do to clean all of this up.

_Might as well begin now_, I thought to myself.

* * *

**Dec 21st**

**Bella Swan**

* * *

Why did life have to throw me curve-balls? Just when I though things were okay, everything took a wrong turn.

I didn't know why I was here. Did Mom ship me off or something in the middle of the night? I was thirteen for crying out loud. Why couldn't she just 'talk' to me? Maybe something was getting to her again.

I sat eating my breakfast with Charlie after sleeping fitfully. I _hated_ it here. I couldn't wait to get back home again.

Sighing, I decided it was now or never to find out when I could go back.

"So… Dad," I said uncertainly. "When do I get out of here?"

Charlie looked up from his food and stared at me.

"'Get out of here'?" he questioned my sanity with those words.

I rolled my eyes. "You know, leave Forks."

He chuckled and went back to his food. "Well Bells, I don't know if you can get a flight out today considering it's so close to Christmas and everything. Plus I don't think the Cullen's will appreciate your departure quite well."

I stood and moved my plate from the table to the counter. It was strange enough being in Forks in the first place without the faces of the Cullen's haunting my every waking moment.

I knew that I recognized them from somewhere but I couldn't place them. I thought I had been in Alice's class at school or something, but the other one, Edward, he was another story.

It was as if I knew him in a different life or something. There was something strangely familiar about him and when he came over last night, I felt a strange pull towards him, as if I had to be closer to him.

Shaking my head, I proceeded to wash my plate. It was stupid to think that, he was probably like eighteen or something. Why should I be so worried over someone who's 5 or 6 years older than I am?

The bracelet hung lightly around my wrist. This, I had definitely seen before. I think it was back when I was younger, at someone's house. It definitely wasn't Mom's house, or Grandma's house. It was a big house, expensive and lavishly decorated. One thing that stood out in the house was the piano…

Charlie appeared beside me and waited to wash his plate. We really needed to buy a dishwasher.

"I don't get why you want to leave, Bells. I thought you liked it here," Charlie shrugged as he spoke.

"It's because I don't belong here, I belong with Mom," I murmured.

Charlie almost dropped his plate. His face went white.

"Belong with your mother?" he mouthed.

I nodded. Why was he acting like this?

"But Bella, she's…" he shook his head and stared at me. "Isabella, she's not here anymore, don't you remember?"

I scowled. "Of course she's not here. She's in Phoenix."

Charlie actually did drop the plate this time. It clattered to the ground before breaking into ceramic shards, spraying us with the remains of the maple syrup left over from his pancakes.

His face went from white, to red, to a strange shade of purple, back to white and then to a sickening green.

"In Phoenix? You think she's in Phoenix?" He spoke in an almost accusing tone.

I nodded, wondering what the hell was going on.

Charlie began to shake his head, stumbling over to his chair and falling into it. He turned his head and looked at me.

"You don't remember, do you?"

I walked over to the chair beside him and stood behind it. "No." I said quietly.

He took a few deep breaths and looked at me again.

"Bella, your mother was murdered in July."

The only thing I was aware of was my legs giving way and the ceiling appearing above me.

Then, everything went black.

* * *

I wasn't exactly sure if I was awakening. My subconscious had been playing sickening games with me for what seemed like an eternity.

My mother's face appeared at one stage, followed by her bloodcurdling scream.

Edward's face replaced it, inching closer to my own, before pulling back and turning distant and unfeeling.

Another face appeared, one I had been trying to forget about for a while. It pulled into a sneer and a menacing laugh came from his mouth.

A gunshot echoed in my mind before reality rushed to greet me like the surface of water when you rise quickly.

"I'm feeling a strong sense of deja vu here," a familiar voice muttered darkly.

I cracked open one eye and looked at the speckled grey ceiling above me. Joy. I was in a hospital, again.

"Ah, Bella, you're awake," a soothing voice said from my right.

I twisted to see a strangely familiar man who I assumed was Edward's father. He was tall with blonde hair and electric blue eyes. If it wasn't for the fact that he was extraordinarily handsome I wouldn't have connected him with Edward.

He smiled at me. "Carlisle Cullen, at your service."

"For possibly the millionth time in her life," Charlie said.

I turned to look for him, only to be greeted by Edward sitting close to the bed, his face a few inches from mine. I automatically drew my head back and scooted to the other side of the bed, putting as space as possible between us. It wasn't that I didn't like having him that close, it's just that is was a bit embarrassing when I'm lying in a hospital bed.

"So… what happened to me this time?" I asked as cheerfully as possible.

I wanted to take that back as soon as I said it.

The room went uncomfortably tense. Everyone looked away from me and glanced at each other. Carlisle gave Charlie a quick look before busying himself with my charts. Edward looked at the wall in front of him before raising his head to look at Charlie. And Charlie just stared at me.

He shuffled in his place and lowered his eyes to the floor.

"Well, you kind of fainted and then hit your head off the ground after… after I told you…" He trailed off.

I frowned. "Told me what?"

Edward shifted in his seat and looked at Charlie before directing his gaze to me. I ripped my eyes unwillingly away from him, knowing that I should be paying attention to Charlie and not drooling over the Greek God beside me.

Letting out a deep breath, Charlie spoke. "I told you that Renée had been killed in July."

I stared at him. It wasn't until Carlisle rushed over to me and started to check the beeping monitor that I noticed my heart rate had stopped and rapidly started again.

"What do mean she died? I was with her the other day! Is this some sort of sick joke, Dad?!" I shrieked.

I had seen her a few days ago, before I turned up in Forks. She was alive, I knew she was. She just had to be.

"Bells, I'm not joking," Charlie said in a desperate tone. "You mother was murdered 5 months ago."

5 months ago? I had seen her the other day. Why wouldn't they believe me?

"Murdered by who?" I spat through my teeth.

Charlie's face went red and Edward's hands clenched in his lap, as if he was trying to restrain himself.

I waited impatiently for someone to speak. "By who!" I screamed. "Who killed her?"

"Phil," Charlie said angrily.

My strange flashbacks started to make some sense.

"He shot her," I whispered, recalling the memory of him pointing the gun to my mothers trembling frame; seeing his satisfied expression when he pulled the trigger…

"You remember?" Edward murmured from my side, now looking intensely at me. His hands gripped the rails that lined my bed.

I knew he was talking about another subject entirely. I shook my head; I didn't understand what he was saying.

My mind was confused; I was trying to fit in four years into the space between starting sixth grade and watching Mom being killed. I could clearly remember four birthdays had passed from my thirteenth birthday to that day… But I was thirteen, wasn't I? I distinctly remember being thirteen this morning…

"I'm confused," I thought out loud.

Carlisle moved closer to the bed and smiled kindly at me.

"Bella, could you tell me what year it is?"

I thought about which answer to give before settling on an explanation.

"Well after hearing that I know it must be 2008, but I'm thirteen, right? So then it's 2004."

Edward stared at me. "2004?" he asked. "Bella, you're not thirteen, you're seventeen."

I almost laughed in his face. Seventeen, he must be deluded.

Silently, he got up and took a large mirror from a table in the room and held it in front of me.

"I highly doubt you're thirteen," he said.

I looked at the woman before me. For a second I thought it was Mom, but she was apparently dead and had way more wrinkles than this person. She looked like me.

I raised a hand and the woman raised a hand. I closed an eye and the woman closed an eye. Tears ran down both of our cheeks

"What's wrong with me?" I sobbed.

* * *

**A/N:** I'm sorry I didn't update in 3 weeks but there is a reason other than school that has made it difficult to write. I won't bore you with the details but it may make me a bit late in updating in the future.

FOR THOSE WHO READ MY OTHER STORIES: the reason for the delay in this story is the reason for why I have, in simpler terms, abandoned them. I'm sorry but it is impossible to update them now. I'll be posting A/N's on them later today explaining the reason. I'll keep them on this site and I do plan to finish them in the future.


	19. A Thing a Dad Shouldn't Hear About

**A/N:** Did anybody else see the new scene from the Rome Film Festival? If you haven't you've missed out on probably one of the best bits released so far. Lol Alice was portrayed exactly as I imagined her.

* * *

**Thanks to:**

F-Clearwater

Ivory76

Luvntwilight

twilight-is-lovee

twilightfanatic9

bloodredeclipse

lgr42293

Breeze.x.x

InLustWithEC

Ashweena200966

bells2014

KeithHarkinFan

* * *

**And thanks to **_Shining Eclipse _**for taking the impossible job of putting up with and validating my story (and listening to me rant about ff's alert system)**

* * *

"_It's gonna take a long time to love  
It's gonna take a lot to hold on  
It's gonna be a long way to happy, yeah  
Left in the pieces that you broke me into  
Torn apart but now I've got to  
Keep on rolling like a stone  
Cause it's gonna be a long way to happy"_

'Long Way To Happy' by Pink

* * *

**Dec 22****nd**

**Bella Swan**

* * *

Five hours.

300 minutes.

18,000 seconds.

I have resorted to timing myself. To see how long it takes for me to wake up from this nightmare; to return back to normal.

Usually my dreams can be a bit… strange, but this has gone beyond the normal nightmare-barriers and into Loonyville, USA. Population: me.

I had to admit though, my imagination had improved vastly in the sensory department. Everything seemed so _real_. From the authentic hospital surrounding, to Edward's scent, to Charlie's frustrated groans.

In the past twenty minutes I had been taken off the machinery and brought to Carlisle's office. I tripped twice and was caught on both occasions by Edward, much to my delight and dismay. It would only make it harder to wake-up now that I knew how Dream-Edward felt and smelt like.

"Now Bella, I want you to tell me anything you can remember from the past four or five years," Carlisle said, sitting on the other side of the vast, mahogany desk. "Anything at all. Even what you had for dinner last week."

Charlie was sitting beside me; glancing constantly between Carlisle and I, never settling on the one face for too long. He kept shifting in his seat and fidgeting with his jacket. Every so often, he would make an involuntary groaning noise and excuse himself from the room. When he did this, Edward took his seat immediately.

The situation with Edward was strange. I had only met him the other day when Alice came over, and yet I felt like I knew him. He acted strangely as well. He would shift closer to me every time he sat down or moved from his place beside the bookshelf. He kept running his hands through his bronze hair over and over again. At one stage Carlisle told him to put a hat on or sit on his hands.

I tried to answer Carlisle's question, and was surprised that my mouth acted on auto-pilot.

"Last week, on Thursday we had lasagna that was leftover from Tuesday's dinner. I spent most of the week in my room. I wore sweatshirts and jeans everyday and woke at half six every morning."

Even I was stunned; I didn't remember any lasagna. Charlie stared open-mouthed at me, his hands falling limp into his lap from their constant position at his chest. Carlisle nodded and smiled while Edward's reaction made me embarrassed. He froze in his place and then shifted closer to my side immediately. His intense stare was unsettling, as if what I said and was about to say could determine his life.

"Okay, now Bella I know this is going to sound strange, but did you actually remember those things or did your mouth just… spurt them out?" he smiled as he spoke. In all honesty he could do really well in police investigation, with that whole 'making you feel comfortable' persona.

I shuffled in my seat, twisting myself away from Edward and closer to Charlie. Staring out of the dark window which gave a bleak view out to the heavy rain outside, I began to speak.

"My mouth just spurted them out," I sighed and decided that this was not a dream anymore, it definitely was reality.

That realization scared the crap out of me. That meant that all of _this_ was real.

The whole thing with Mom's death didn't bother me that much. Sure it hurt to understand she was gone, but in comparison to everything else, it was much easier to deal with.

I had no clue about the last few years, how they just… suddenly went by without any memories or understanding. I could vaguely make out some details of the first two years, but the last two, especially recently, were completely blank.

The way my mouth opened and said things that I had no idea about was freaking me out. I must have looked like some sort of creature from a horror movie. I was surprised Charlie didn't get a bucket for the pea soup that was about to spew out of my mouth.

The thing that bothered me the most was Edward. I felt… a bond with him but I couldn't understand how that bond came to place. He was always around me; close to me. He hadn't left the hospital at all. Every time I moved, he was there with me. He constantly shifted towards me like I was a magnet. It honestly was beginning to scare me.

"Crap; this isn't a dream," I groaned and let my head fall into my hands. I heard Charlie reaching over to me but didn't feel his touch. Edward moved closer again until he was leaning against the arm of the chair.

"You thought that this was a dream Bella?" Carlisle asked.

I looked up tentatively and gulped, choking out a "yes" while avoiding both Charlie's and Edward's stares.

Carlisle sat forward and placed his hands under his chin. He pushed his notepad and my file away from him with his elbow.

"How long did you think that you have been in a dream, Bella?"

"About five hours, since I woke up basically," I muttered.

"Why did you think this was a dream?" he asked simply.

Again, my mouth operated without a command.

"Because Mom's dead, I can't remember the past four years properly, I can only barely remember the beginning of those four years, I'm only realizing now that I am seventeen and what I'm feeling for Edward right now is really, _really_ frightening!"

I started sobbing towards the end of my rant and ended it with a shriek. Banging my head against the heel of my hand, I muttered, "Why does my mouth have an auto-start feature?"

Throughout my fit, I was hyperaware of the people around me.

Carlisle stood up from his chair only to sit back down and observe me quietly. Charlie groaned and muttered something about even when I was out of it I was still thinking of 'that boy'. Edward looked as though he could start crying himself. He gripped the arm of the chair tightly and was now inches away from me.

It took me about half an hour to calm down. Nobody moved from their places during that time and everyone was silent. When my sobbing died down, Carlisle started to speak.

"What we realized back before you found the ornament, before you reverted back to childhood, was that your brain completely blocked everything about Edward out. After you found the ornament, your brain was forced to access those memories and so, in attempts to defend itself, it basically brought you back to a time when you thought about him least."

He observed all three of us as he spoke, pausing on myself and Edward.

"From what I can see, when you were thirteen you still kept thinking of him, and that is why you still feel connected to him and you probably see some things that may relate to him," he took a deep breath and paused for a moment, "But from what I can see here, your brain is digging up parts of recent memories."

It was Edward who spoke this time. "How so?"

Carlisle sighed and glanced between us again. "The relationship between the two of you was strongest during the past months; before all of this. There is no way she could be frightened of feelings for you when she was thirteen or younger-"

"Wait, relationship? I don't understand any of this. How was Edward in my life before? What happened recently?" I interrupted him.

Charlie groaned. "I was hoping this wouldn't be brought up when I was in the room." He grimaced, "It was bad enough knowing the basics of it and now I'm probably going to hear the whole story."

Carlisle smiled sympathetically. "You should try having a daughter like Alice; she shares everything with us about Jasper."

I frowned. "What are you talking about Dad?"

Charlie looked as though being dragged over a bed of hot coals would be less painful than answering me.

"Well… you and… him… kinda dated," he spat out each of the words as though they were caught in his esophagus.

Carlisle smiled smugly while both Edward and I radiated heat. I think he may have been blushing more than I was.

It was bad enough knowing that I had some… insane connection with Edward, but to know that _I_ had been somewhat dating _him_ was illogical. And completely embarrassing considering I couldn't remember anything and my father was in the room.

An uncomfortable silence fell on the room and Edward shifted slightly from his almost crouched position over my chair to move a few inches away. Charlie sat nearly fuming in his seat with a mixture of annoyance and embarrassment. The only person at ease was Carlisle who sat back in his large chair with his hands resting on his lap.

Incredibly enough, it was Charlie who broke the silence.

"Do we start from the very beginning or recently?" he asked in a rough, forced voice.

Sitting forward, Carlisle contemplated for a moment on which option to choose. He glanced over to Edward and nodded slightly.

"The beginning would probably be more beneficial to her and easier to piece together rather than starting recently."

Charlie let out a deep breath and looked extremely relieved. I looked at him curiously until he threw his hands up and admitted what he was anxious about.

"I want to know about what's going on in your life Bells but I draw the line at relationships. Knowing his daughter has a… a boy-… a boyfr-," he threw Edward a frustrated glare and spat out the rest of the sentence. "… _someone_ in her life is way too much information for a father to know."

"At least you're not as bad as Dad," Edward chuckled hoarsely, "He threatened Jasper with an estrogen booster injection if he ever mistreated Alice and then spent three days locked in his office trying to forget about Jasper completely."

Charlie laughed nervously and his eyes started to dart about the room. I groaned out loud.

"No! You did _not_ use the gun as a threat," I half-shouted, twisting in my chair to glare at Charlie.

"I didn't use the gun; I just may have insinuated that an arrest might be…"

"What?!" I shouted. I didn't even remember Edward being my sort-of-boyfriend but this was unacceptable, even for Charlie.

"I actually remember that day," Carlisle mused. "You were as white as a ghost, Edward."

I shook my head and clamed myself down. I knew that I could kill Charlie some other day for doing that but for now I needed to get my teenage memories back.

"Right, where are we starting with my memory?"

* * *

Six hours, and two years of my past later, Charlie and I walked out of the hospital.

It had gotten below forty, and the water was beginning to turn to ice beneath our boots. I was glad I wasn't driving tonight, even if I could remember how. It was one of the things I wished I could remember.

Carlisle and Charlie had explained as much as possible to me about the time when I was thirteen and fourteen. We were getting to my fifteenth birthday when Edward mentioned the time.

My years as a thirteen and fourteen year old were mainly the same as the previous two years. Phil abused Mom and hit me. I had no friends and school was my only outlet. I visited Charlie in California and spent most of the summer with him. I didn't return to Forks.

Those two years were easy enough to remember. I was grateful for that. At least now it was two down, and another two and a half to go.

The drive home was quiet but comfortable. I was exhausted and ready to fall asleep on the nearest available couch or bed. The forests zoomed around us in the blackness of the night and the sly was vacant because the moon hid low behind the trees to our right.

We were driving through town when someone blew past us at a reckless speed.

"Kids," Charlie huffed as he switched on his sirens and followed.

I sunk down lower into my seat, hoping that the person would outrun Charlie or not be someone who knew me. Having a cop as a father was now beginning to take its toll.

The massive Jeep pulled over immediately and I could see two figures in the front seats. Charlie got out of the car and walked over, pausing at the driver's window. His face almost broke into a grin before resuming a professional façade. I cracked the window to hear the conversation.

"… well you were going a bit fast there Emmett."

Emmett. Emmett Cullen, Edward's brother. I knew that Jeep was familiar. I could now see the passenger's blonde head turn slightly and recognized the face as Rosalie Hale, girlfriend of Emmett and twin of Jasper.

My first week at Forks High was slowly creeping into my mind. Visions of holding notebooks and feelings of manic depression worked their way into my mind but did not stick. Something else was occupying their previous space and would not budge. I tried to see what that thing was but it was too dark and blurry to make out.

Charlie finished talking to Emmett and let him go without a ticket or warning. He strolled back to the car and climbed in quickly.

"That was interesting," he laughed.

I smiled. "Yeah, Emmett is interesting in his own way."

Charlie fumbled with the keys and almost dropped them. He recovered quickly and nodded. "Yes he is interesting. Hmm…"

He trailed off in thought for a moment and started to mumble incoherently to himself. I settled for watching the now familiar forests and houses flash by instead of worrying over what Charlie was thinking.

We pulled into the drive and got out of the car quickly, both eager to get inside. Charlie ran straight for the phone, ignoring the fact that he still had his coat and wet boots on which left damp footprints along the hallway.

I paused on the stairs and listened to him. He quickly dialed a number and sat heavily into his chair. Whoever it was picked up immediately.

"No, nothing's wrong," Charlie sighed. "I think I might have found something that may help her though."

The person talked for a moment while Charlie nodded.

"Yeah. Remember when she had the fits? They were caused by triggers, by things that made her remember? Well earlier I caught Emmett and Rosalie speeding along the highway, trying to get home before curfew and she actually remembered Emmett. Well, I was thinking, what if we took her around, showed her things that would help her remember?"

The person spoke again and Charlie broke into a grin. He cleared his throat and spoke in his 'cop' voice. "Well if you are going to help, you do realize I want parental supervision at all times now?"

My mouth fell open and I almost ran into the kitchen. He was saying that to…

"I'll talk to you later, Edward. Bye."

He hung up the phone and started to walk towards the door to hang up his coat. I stumbled up the stairs and caught my foot on the third step from the top, causing me to fall onto the landing.

"Bells, are you okay?" Charlie said as he ran to the bottom of the stairs. I quickly shifted myself around so it looked like I tripped coming out of my bedroom.

"I'm fine, just tripped over a shoe," I explained as I pulled myself up.

Charlie smiled and hung his coat on the last hanger, only for it to fall to the ground.

"Just be careful. We don't want you falling down the stairs."

I nodded and walked into the bathroom. I sat down on the floor for a few minutes and decided to take a shower. I needed something to do before I went to sleep anyway. Grabbing my old tank top and shorts from the basket on the shelves, I quickly toweled and dressed.

The television could be heard from the landing as I made my way into my room. I wondered why Charlie was watching it at midnight when all he ever watched was games.

My room was dark and I didn't bother turning on the light or pulling down the blind. I made my way cautiously over to my bed and fell onto it. I was too tired to pull back the sheets and get under them. The heating was on anyways, so I wasn't worried about being too cold.

My mind slowly began to shut down as the black shroud of unconsciousness covered me, paralyzing my limbs. I welcomed it and slipped into a deep sleep.

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**A/N: It's actually hard to write the point of a near-amnesiac… I only realized that after I was halfway done this chapter.**

**We're coming to the end of this story so I have to get to the big finale-thing and then end it, so (in the story timeline) this should be finished after New Year's (****story timeline ****as said before). I think I'll have it done before mid-December, early January. It all depends on my exams and if the story gets more reviews (I have a small idea in mind if I was to continue on as an extra to this or a sequel but it all depends on the response to the story)**

**In case I can't get another update before it, have fun watching the movie. I won't get to see it until about December 19****th**** (stupid Irish film system, why do we have to rely on the English release date??)**


	20. Emmett Acing Trig

**A/N: We've reached chapter 20 (I didn't think I could get this story past chapter one but I was wrong…).**

**This is unedited because I wanted to get it up as soon as I saved it.**

**I know I'm about a month late on this chapter but I've had ECDL (European Computer Driving Licence, yeah we laughed too. Who need a driving licence for a computer?) tests every Thursday for the past couple of weeks (woo got my certificate!), Christmas rehearsals, exams, projects, the movie, an ice-skating trip and planning the eventual murder of Alex Reed (seriously he got Coldplay tickets for the gig in Phoenix Park and tickets to see FOB and Boys Like Girls in London).**

**Please remember that I have had a ton of work to do recently and with Christmas coming up my mind has gone mental so this chapter isn't as long as other ones.**

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**Spider-monkey e-cookies to:**

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Tear of Mist

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**Thanks to **Shining Eclipse **for betaing most of my chapters, I'll send this one to you soon to fix**

**I might be able to get rid of that great big list soon if I can get the review reply links working. I switched my email over and hopefully it will work now.**

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_

But remember the time I told you the way that I felt

_That I'd be lost without you and never find myself  
Let's hold onto each other above everything else  
Start over, start over  
I'll do whatever it takes  
To turn this around  
I know what's at stake  
I know I've let you down  
And if you give me a chance and believe that I can change  
I'll keep us together whatever it takes _

'Whatever It Takes' by Lifehouse

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Dec 23rd

**Edward Cullen**

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"Come on… come on," I muttered impatiently, tapping my fingers against the leather steering wheel of my Volvo.

I was stuck behind Mr Brooks' truck, filled with last minute Christmas tree orders. He was crawling along at a speed easily surpassed by the brave cyclists that zoomed by us.

"Dude, just pass him already," Emmett yawned from behind me. Both he and Alice had tagged along for the day. Charlie did say I needed company while with Bella and they wanted to see her so I was killing two birds with one stone by agreeing to their demands.

"We're gonna miss Christmas at this rate," Emmett moaned, hitting his head repeatedly off my headrest.

"Cut that out," I snapped, swatting at his hair. With his strength, and stupidity, he could very well end up breaking my seat.

He leaned back and grimaced when his head sit his seat. "You try staying out all night, coming home to _that_," he pointed to a very chipper Alice, "and having a massive hangover from staying out all said night."

Alice turned in her seat and glared at Emmett. "I can't help it if I'm excited to see Bella and it's your own fault for not coming home earlier."

Emmett stared back at Alice until his eyes snapped shut and he let out a loud groan. "Pixie. Annoying. Head. Pounding. Too. Much. Alcohol."

The truck finally pulled into a yard and allowed us to pass. I passed it quickly and gunned it to Bella's house. We were twenty minutes late already and we had only covered a quarter mile.

"Excited much?" Alice muttered, her hands clenching on her seat from the speed I was travelling at. The girl drives a Porsche at reckless speeds and can't even handle my driving.

We pulled up onto Bella's street only to see Charlie sitting outside the door staring at our car as it approached. He had his coat on and was visibly annoyed.

"Edward," he said curtly as I got out of the car. I nodded and smiled, running over to let Emmett out because he was having trouble opening the door without the use of sight.

Alice hopped out of the passengers side and grinned at Charlie. The change in Charlie's emotions was instantaneous. "Alice! It's good to see you again."

I pulled Emmett's door open roughly and he tumbled out into the snow that had gathered on the curb.

"Cold, good," he sighed, nuzzling his face into the subzero mush that covered the grass. I grabbed his shoulder and yanked him up off the ground. "No need to act like Scrooge dude, that part was already taken in the movie we watched yesterday by that guy, what was his name…"

Emmett trailed off in his sentence and stumbled towards the door, almost falling twice on branches that were strewn across the ground. Alice helped guide him into the house as I went to talk to Charlie.

The sun had barely risen even though it was gone twelve and the eerie glow that crept through the trees shone on Charlie's face making him look more sinister than need be. I tried not to glance back to Bella's window or to the door.

Charlie stood as I approached him, making it clear that I was a good three inches taller than him but he was the one with a license to carry a gun and shoot me if he wanted to.

"I have been very lenient with your relationship with Bella in the past, Edward, but I think I have to play a bigger part this time," he started walking to my side, effectively blocking my escape route.

"From now on I want to know where my daughter is, what she is doing, who she is with and when she will be back. I am not allowing you to take him on any unscheduled trips and all parties or 'afternoon study sessions'," he used air quotes to make his point, "must be supervised by a reliable parent. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal, sir," I tried to mould my face into what Emmett described as the 'I will lick your dog's ass if you ask me to' expression.

Charlie observed me for a moment before stepping aside and allowing me into the house. I caught a glimpse of Emmett in the front window using air quotes and gesturing to Charlie all while mouthing 'whipped' to me. Hopefully Charlie won't see him.

Inside the house it was much warmer than outside. Shrugging out of my coat, I made my way into the sitting room where Alice's and Bella's voices drifted through the hallway. Everyone went quiet as I walked in. Alice grinned at both Bella and I while Emmett sat into a chair and looked as us as if it was time for the show to begin.

I turned to see Bella sitting beside Alice, her face hidden by her hair. She was fidgeting with a string on her top and looked extremely uneasy.

"Hey Bella," I said as softly as possible. Bella's head snapped up and she gaped at me like a deer caught in headlights. Her face was bright red already and I could feel the blush creeping into my own face as well.

"Are you guys going to stare at each other all day or are we going to go?" Emmett said from his chair. Alice shot him a death glare and smiled at Bella and I. I noticed Bella sending Alice a look when she broke our gaze.

"What?" Alice muttered to Bella, putting on her fake surprised look. It had taken me ten years to understand what her real surprised look was and what her fake surprised look was.

Charlie picked that moment to come in. In one way I was thankful, he had just interrupted what could have been a very awkward moment between Bella and I or a very nasty fight between Alice and Emmett.

In another way I wished he would have waited. I needed to talk with Bella. Not get occasional sentences exchanged in sessions with Dad, but have a proper conversation. I would even settle with a discussion on the weather at this point.

I had planned to see if Bella was okay being on her own with me. If she was then I would dump Alice and Dumbett in the nearest mall or IHOP and spend as much time with Bella as possible. If she wasn't then I would have to settle with having Alice and Dumbett in the car with us.

Charlie swatted Emmett out of his chair and sat down across from us. "So what's the plan?" he asked nonchalantly, all while sending me looks as if to remind me of our previous conversation.

"We were planning on basically reliving Bella's first few months here. Starting from her first day at school and continuing on to the mall in Port Angeles, the diner and our house," I explained, inserting in quickly, "Dad and Mom will help us as well when we get home."

Emmett doubled over behind Charlie's chair, silently laughing at my idiotic mumblings. Charlie felt the vibrations caused by Emmett and turned quickly to look at him. Emmett quickly straightened up and pretended to cough violently to conceal his remaining laughter.

Charlie nodded briefly, as if agreeing to this was like he was agreeing to torture. "Have fun."

Alice hopped off the couch and grabbed Bella, dragging her out of the door. Emmett trailed after them, jogging into the kitchen to get a glass of water because he was currently choking on his own spit.

I gave Charlie a quick nod and hurried after everyone. I never thought the harsh cold air could be so refreshing after being interrogated by… Dammit, what was Charlie to me now?

I mean it wasn't like Bella was my girlfriend before, although I wanted her to be. It's just that now, she was something of a forgetful other half.

I shook my head and hurried after Alice and Bella who were standing at the car waiting for me to open it.

"Come on, Edward," Alice moaned, hopping up and down to help herself keep warm. Bella stood beside her, teeth chattering after leaving the warm house and entering the frigid winter air. I noted with a groan that she had forgotten her coat.

Throwing my keys at Alice, I ran back inside to grab her coat before she froze. I stopped dead when I heard Emmett and Charlie talking.

"… I know but you have to give him some credit, he's only doing what's best for Bella."

Charlie sighed and seen him slump against the door frame in the kitchen. "I know but she's my daughter and as much as I want my Bella back, I'd rather that she stays like this than if he pushes her too hard and she breaks. Just tell him to take it easy."

Emmett walked past Charlie and nodded at me. He knew I had caught the last of his conversation and looked a bit sympathetic.

I spotted Bella's coat hanging by the front door and pulled it off the hook. Charlie turned and looked surprised at the sight of me still in the hall. I held up the coat and nodded before turning on my heel and leaving.

Alice had climbed into the front seat and had the heater running full blast. I handed the coat back to Bella. She mumbled a thanks and slipped it on. My nose started to burn as I belted up. Emmett reached forward and slammed on my radio, turning the station to some hip-hop/festive crap.

"Let's hit the road! We have too much to do and we'll be here until Christmas if Eddie doesn't get moving," Emmett boomed.

Alice rolled her eyes. "Tomorrow's Christmas Eve, you idiot."

I glanced in the mirror only to see Emmett counting down the days with his fingers.

"23rd…24th… oh yeah! Well we'll be here from now until… What would happen a long time from now?" he asked.

"You acing Trig?" Bella suggested.

All of us burst into laughter, including Emmett. I glanced back again to look at Bella. She seemed to be relaxing.

"Right, first stop: school," Alice stated. "Then Port Angeles, the diner…"

I blocked her out as I turned off Bella's road only to see a police cruiser flying past, siren's blaring.

"What the hell?" Emmett muttered. We watched as it pulled into Charlie's drive, two officers getting out and running up to the door.

"Turn around," Bella whispered. I slammed the car into reverse and pulled up in front of the house. Both Bella and I got out and raced up to the door.

"What's going on?" Charlie asked the officers, looking at us as well. The officers noticed us behind them and one mouthed something to Charlie. He nodded and looked back at us. "Go back to the school and continue what you were doing. Nothing's going on, they just heard of some supposed gang presence up in the next county."

Bella smiled at Charlie and turned. I knew something wasn't right but followed her anyway.

"False alarm, just an attack or something in the area," Bella told Emmett and Alice as we got back into the car.

Alice stared at me for a few moments and knew something was going on. Thankfully she didn't say anything.

The ride was quiet aside from Emmett singing along to some song on the radio. We got to the school later than we expected because of holiday traffic.

"Right, here we are," I said, switching off the engine and opening the door.

The school looked ominous with no activity going on inside or out. A thick layer of snow had gathered along the sidewalk and ice covered the roof.

We picked our way carefully throw the snow, making out way towards the main office.

"Do you remember any of this Bella?" Alice asked, hopping gracefully around various obstacles and ice patches.

"Kind of," Bella replied, her eyes glued to the ground as she carefully made her way over to where Emmett was now standing. I dropped back behind her so I could catch her if she fell.

Emmett's cell rang and he reached into his pocket to answer it.

"Hey Charlie… No, I don't think so… Yeah, he's here. Edward, it's for you!"

He threw the cell like a miniature football and I had to step back to catch it.

"Hello?"

"Edward!" Charlie shouted frantically, "Get Bella back now."

"What's going on?" I asked, wondering what could have gotten him so worked up.

"Phil's back."

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Phil

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I had planned everything out for weeks, but it was too easy in the end.

I had spent every possible day watching where they went, what they did, and now it was finally paying off.

Everything had fallen into place like a simple puzzle.

They were bringing her around to their 'hang-outs' and I knew every single one, and the order they went in.

I knew they had heard about me when the protective boyfriend bundled the brat into the car and sped off but that didn't bother me.

They would be back, and I would be ready and waiting.

Gun in hand and revenge ready to be served.

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A/N: Again I'm so sorry for the delay, I'm hoping to keep the momentum going over Christmas and write more chapters if possible. I hope everyone has a good Christmas/New Year/etc etc.

**Anybody else excited over the supposed Valentine's Day DVD release day?? The best news for me is that I'm going to New York that day for a school trip…. Anyone in the city who sees about 100 crazed Irish teenage girls running into the nearest stockist screaming should just ignore our madness (we'd be hyper on sugar and jetlag and caffeine and Diet Coke and chocolate…. You have to love school trips!). I feel so sorry for the Aer Lingus cabin crew on our flight.**

_**Nollaig shona duit!**_

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	21. Fish in a Barrel

**A/N: Just three things to say today: first off, THANK YOU to whoever nominated this story for Best Villain and Best Characterisation in the Twilight Awards (links on my profile). Voting starts on the 17****th**** I think but I'll be posting again with a reminder when it officially begins.**

**Secondly, I know this chapter is late and I do apologise but it was down to reasons outside of my control (namely school/tests/headaches…)**

**Thirdly, I've been having major email trouble again (I can't open the box to pick or type the address to send anything to, stupid msn) so this is unedited again, sorry Padfootly, I'll get it to you soon.**

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**Now to the last long list (I finally have 100% links so I'll be able to reply to your reviews), thank you to:**

Padfootly

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**It's short but there's only 3-4 more chapters left and I want to bulk up the next few…**

_Water was running, children were running  
You were running out of time  
Under the mountain, a golden fountain  
Were you praying at the Lares shrine?  
But ohh, oh your city lies in dust  
_'Cities in Dust' by Junkie XL

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**December**

**Phil's POV**

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A lot can happen in a month, and standing here staring at my target, is proof of that. In theory, plotting the eventual murder of a person is meant to be difficult. In practice, it's a whole lot easier when you have experience and you're target is standing in front of you half the time.

I had to keep a low profile after I stupidly dropped my wallet. I had to apply for a new ID and make sure to constantly change location. That was difficult, until the company I worked for offered me a job that required me to travel within the Seattle area to check in on sister companies within the group. It was like my goal was destined to happen.

I had gone to my usual dealer for the ID. He sympathised when I told him some of my story. He had been caught three times by small town cops and had a officer from Colorado to thank for his busted up leg. I was given the new ID within two weeks after it had passed screening tests by some of the biggest underground criminals in Manhattan.

My new position required me to travel within and outside of the Seattle area, no further than Port Angeles. I was given permission to use company funds to help subsidise my hotel bills and rent charges. Another perk.

My first lodging was a small apartment in the suburbs of Seattle. Not quite up to my standards but perfect for my tradition of 'cash-in-hand, mouth kept shut'. The landlord was happy to oblige considering most of his tenants were drug dealers and other non-descript criminals. It felt like home.

I used to come back every afternoon, pay a short but very sweet visit to 2c to pick up some more information. The guy there was working undercover as a cop for an underground organisation that had been importing drugs into Seattle port for years. He truly was an angel in disguise for someone like me. All I had to do was walk in the door and he would automatically tell me how the search for me was going and where they would be looking next.

My second lodging was a bit more… luxurious than the previous. A small suite in a hotel down near the Sound. I unfortunately had to use my new ID for that check-in, my old one was a favourite of mine. I was then known to hotel staff and fellow guests as Adam Hannon, a free-lance businessman from Connecticut.

I made some very worthwhile connections in that area. A guy called Spike was able to supply me with a Glock 17. I had been meaning to acquire a gun for quite some time but had always preferred knives, despite the amount of evidence left with the weapon and the remaining damage after a stabbing. A gun was much more effective, could hit targets at a greater distance and left much less carnage afterwards.

Another connection was with another man called Blank and a woman named Victoria. I had a suspicion that Blank's real name was James after hearing Victoria call him that before I entered the room at one meeting. They had been vital to my goal.

James' passion and strength was tracking down victims. He was young, in his twenties, but extremely capable. He excelled at long-distance or harder missions. He had a very impressive success rate, only missing one case so far after the victim committed suicide days before James entered her hometown. It was through him I pinpointed all the locations I needed.

The woman Victoria seemed to be James' lover. They worked in large as a team, but were able to operate separately without any hassle. She was the same age as James, it seemed, with bright red hair. Victoria lived for James and his missions. In a way she was in love with her job as much as she was in love with James. If he couldn't carry out part of a mission, she took over and finished it.

We worked together to travel to Forks. At first, they went to make sure everything was safe enough for me to go. They also were able to hack into a hospital database and find out when and why the girl was there. Then they became my indispensable cohorts.

Within a few days, I was able to go. I have now come a full circle to where I am standing now, in the forest beside the girl's house, watching all of her little friends carry her to the door. She looks frightened, that is a satisfying thing. Her boyfriend looks livid. Ah, the overprotective type. A good fight will occur with him I think, after I shoot her. I do enjoy attempts at revenge, especially since I always win.

I had planned from the beginning to make this as painful as possible for her and any of the people who cared for her, to show them the extent of my revenge. I had a good shot from here but I didn't take it, no that would have been too easy. I wanted to be closer to her, to make her suffer.

Tapping my foot against the fallen tree beside me, I pondered over how much time I had left. Obviously I would have to act soon but I also had to wait for the go-ahead from James and Victoria.

They had come with me, deciding that three people were better than one. Also they could come in handy if I needed a distraction or help.

James had suggested to chase the girl. Give her a fake warning, make the boyfriend or father take her and run. He was a sucker for a hunt and the harder the game, the sweeter the success.

Victoria agreed with James but also gave me another option. Confront the girl straight on, with everyone else trying to protect her. It was blatantly obvious that three highly experienced, armed criminals were better than a small town cop and a few teenagers. The fight would be very enjoyable but not as rewarding as the hunt.

Both options had their drawbacks. With the hunt, there was always the danger that she would escape us somehow. My only rule in this business was to never underestimate your opponents. We didn't know much about the boy or the others, they could have connections.

With the confrontation, it would leave us too exposed. What would happen if the cop called back-up? What if it ended too soon? There would be no pleasure in any of those consequences.

I had debated on a mixture of the two. Give the father something to suggest I was on my way or at a specific location and make them run. Then confront them at the location James and I had scouted.

Currently James was setting up evidence and checking on the location. Victoria was in a van somewhere on the outskirts of town, checking the activity of the police station telephone and computer system. If anybody used either then she would automatically know and inform us.

I had gotten a text from her earlier to say that the station had noticed the car James had left at the diner and knew I was in town. Already I had put two and two together and knew that Charlie had called the boyfriend, hence the reason the girl was here now.

I made my way around the trees beside me so as I could get a better look at the back of the house. The place was very non-descript and it looked as if nobody had touched it's exterior with a paintbrush for over ten years. The miniature back yard was in need of tending to. The grass needed to be mowed and the entire space needed a good slosh of weed-killer. Some plants slumped wearily against their small fenced enclosure, finishing off the hopeless atmosphere.

There was no action in the windows from where I stood. I knew that they were inside but I wanted to know where exactly they all were and if I could hear or see anything that could be of value.

I was killing time and I knew that I had much longer to wait. Why not spy on them?

I paced forward a few steps, keeping as far from the edge as possible without losing sight of the house. I made my way over to the other side of the house. I could see into the upstairs window and at least two of the downstairs rooms.

At last, some activity. The father was pacing in what appeared to be the sitting room with the large teenager I knew was Emmett Cullen. The smaller on, Alice Cullen, danced into view and spoke briefly with both of them. She left the room. I kept my eyes trained on the other windows, hoping to see something. A flicker in the upstairs window told me that the room had occupants.

I edged closer again until I was dangerously close to the forest edge. I needed cover but this was too good of an opportunity to pass up.

The small one came into view at the window. To my utter surprise and delight, she _opened_ the window. Her voice carried down to where I stood.

"…no point in sitting here fuming. It's too stuffy in here to think straight anyway."

I inched closer again to the sound. I needed to hear everything. I could hear someone get up noisily and stomp around.

"Yes but I have every right to fume," a male voice said. I presumed this was the boyfriend.

"Is anybody going to tell me what the hell's going on or am I going to be left in the dark once again?"

The girl's voice was a monotone. It set my teeth on edge. Just the knowledge that she was there and alive pissed me off.

My cell buzzed in my pocket and I retreated back into the shadows to take the call.

"Yeah?" I answered gruffly, not pleased in the fact that I couldn't hear them.

"We're ready when you are," James said with a pleasant tone in his voice.

I sighed. Finally, it was almost time.

"I'll notify you when I'm ready here."

I snapped the cell shut and made my way back. Now to put the last piece in place in order to get my plan started.

It was time to get Victoria to send out the last tip-off to get them running.

I decided to stand by the edge while I texted her. The conversation upstairs floated down to me.

"…and it's too dangerous to go out now!" the boyfriend shouted.

"But what if you took me somewhere? Sent me on a plane to anywhere?! Then none of you guys would be in danger. Phil would be forced to follow me and the police would be able to catch him," the girl said. I froze and listened intently to them.

The boy huffed and shuffled at bit. "Fine. We'll run now."

I felt the grin cover my face as I keyed in the number.

"No need for the last bit of information. They have fallen into the trap earlier than expected," I told Victoria. I heard her laugh before I hung up.

As I said, this was too simple.

They were running to the airport.

Where we were already ready and waiting in the car park.

It seriously was too easy.

* * *

**A/N: I now officially have kick-started the ending *sigh*. I just realised this: I'm finally finishing something. Haha my procrastination has finally weakened, now if only I could make it disappear in school…**

**I should have an update about voting up soon when it starts, everybody who hasn't bee over to thetwilightawards-this paradise(dot)com should check it out, some really good stories linked there and the chatbox is always used (unlike other sites).**


	22. Trap

**A/N: In my haste to get this up, it's unedited. (I'm sending a draft to my beta as I type this)**

**I'm actually surprised too that I updated. My only excuse this time is that things have happened in the past few months that nobody could have ever imagined, and I'm not just talking about faulty computers or busy schedules.**

**Thank you to **_Padfootly_** for being my beta and even sticking with the story (and me). And also a big thank you to everyone who added this as to their alerts or even reviewed when it hadn't been updated in a while. You guys are what keeps me glued to my computer screen, yelling at pages of work to flow better or get longer.**

**Now to end this a/n and start the beginning of the end.**

* * *

'_When our time is up,_

_When our lives are done,_

_Will we say we've had our fun?_

_Will we make our mark, this time?'_

'Rooftops' by Lostprophets

* * *

**Bella Swan**

* * *

There are many times now when I feel like nobody listens to me. Strangely this isn't one of them.

In what seemed like a blur, Edward ran me downstairs, made me sit down while he went over details with Charlie and tried to convince Alice to stay here with Emmett.

Emmett was ready for a fight, his nostrils flaring while he clenched his fists repeatedly, but he had no idea just how serious this could be. He sat awkwardly in the small chair beside me while pouting like a child when he was told he wouldn't be coming with us. Alice tried calming him down a bit by talking to him rationally.

"Going with them will only make the situation worse," she said, coaxing him into a more relaxed state of mind.

Edward and Charlie stood opposite us, both of them had identical expressions.

"I think this may be a bad idea," Charlie muttered, leaning against the wall opposite me, observing my somewhat relaxed face with a look of confusion.

Edward nodded discreetly. "But it's the only logical one we have right now. We don't exactly have enough time to come up with something safer."

Looking between the two of them, I felt a lump rise in my throat. Edward was driving me to the airport but was also putting himself in danger. Charlie was going to be monitoring everything while he tailed us to a safe point. If anything happened to either of them I would hold myself personally responsible for the rest of my life.

I looked down on the pretence of checking my bag while taking deep breaths to slow my speeding heart rate. Getting upset now would only stall Edward from leaving and I had a flight to catch. I lifted my head in time to see Charlie shaking Edward's hand with a small smile in place.

"Take care of my little girl," he whispered, his eyes watering.

Edward nodded solemnly. "With my life, sir."

Charlie walked towards me, keeping his eyes on the floor. I quickly rose to my feet to throw my arms around him.

"Come on, Bells. Everything will work out okay in the end," he told me, his voice muffled by my hair.

Patting my back as any father would when confronted with an overemotional, teenage daughter, he backed away slightly from my embrace.

Reaching down to grab my bag, I looked over to see if Edward was ready to leave. He searched my face intently, looking for anything that could keep me here safe than send me off as bait. I held strong, meeting his gaze and nodding. Shifting from where he was standing, he pushed off the wall and walked towards the door, grabbing my hand in the process.

"I'll tail you when I get the all clear from the station up in Seattle," Charlie said in, what I used to call, his 'chief' voice.

"Seattle?" I asked, confused. I thought that he was using the local Forks' station.

"Bella, we dealing with a criminal here. A small town police force of barely ten isn't going to help in any way," Charlie responded gruffly, opening the door slightly and searching the immediate area quickly. "They have sent messages to all airports and points of entry or exit. If he tries to leave the state or even the country, he'll be caught."

I glanced back into the sitting room before leaving. Alice and Emmett stayed in their seats not moving to the door or window, after we warned them that Phil could be watching the house. Alice gave me a small smile while Emmett continued to pout.

Sucking in a deep breath, I followed Edward towards the car. I knew all too well that we were no longer safe.

The air had grown crisp, surprisingly dry for Forks. We marched out towards the Volvo, the sun that had broken through the thick streams of cloud glinted off it as it began to lower in the sky.

Charlie walked with us and opened my door while Edward loaded my bag into the back.

"I'll see you soon, Bella," he whispered. His eyes started to fill with tears. Giving him a reassuring smile, I climbed into the passenger seat.

"Don't worry too much, Dad. I'll be back in time to cook you your dinner tomorrow," I told him, trying to make light of a difficult situation.

"Let's hope so. Last thing I need is to burn down the kitchen trying to toast some bread," he laughed.

Edward had gotten into his seat and turned on the engine during our exchange. I closed my door, giving one last wave to Charlie. The car sprang forward and we were on our way.

We made our way out of the town and onto the main road. Every person that we passed made me anxious and every car that came anywhere near us made me glance over my shoulder to see who was in the driver's seat. I hadn't been this… _afraid_ in a while.

Edward dug into his pockets at a red light and chucked me his cell.

"If it rings, check the number and tell me. Don't answer straight away, okay?" he instructed, turning to face me for the first time since we began the drive.

I met his gaze and was surprised at the anxiety in his eyes. He usually tried to keep a brave face.

The light turned green and we continued on with our journey.

Reaching the highway, I relaxed. We travelled at a quicker pace than before and didn't have any obstacles like traffic lights to slow us down.

Leaning further back into my seat, I brought my legs up to my chest and settled in for the drive ahead. It wouldn't be a long one but we weren't planning on stopping until we reached the airport.

Trees, cars and trucks zoomed by just like the seconds that ticked. The analogue clock on the dash seemed to operate in bursts, the minutes speeding by every time I checked.

We were approaching the turn when we noticed something that we hadn't planned on.

Our turn had a queue backed up about a mile due to road improvements ahead.

"This is all we need," Edward muttered.

"My flights not for another hour and a half," I said, trying to calm him down. His hand continuously clenched the steering wheel and he kept pinching his nose every time we stopped.

We eventually pulled off the main road and entered a road improvement zone. Traffic cones and detour warnings covered the sides of the road, forcing what should be a substantial two lane off-ramp into a fairly narrow one-lane road.

After ten minutes of waiting, we finally passed through the airport entrance and were greeted by numerous signs and turns for terminals, car parks and hotels. Unfortunately most of them were blocked off cones and barricades, forcing all traffic through the one road and onto diverted routes.

Cars were slowly trickling through the diversions and were being directed manually by one of the site workers ahead.

As we reached the top of the queue, Edward rolled his window down.

"Where are you heading?" the man asked, his rough image complimented by his accent.

"Drop-off," Edward replied curtly.

The man shook his head. "The drop-off zones are being improved, all traffic to that area has to use the old short-term car park and get a shuttle over. Second right ahead."

Following the other cars, we drove down the wide road. Most of the cars turned at either the first right or took the left turn.

Casting a worried glance over to Edward, he pointed out some of the cars turning in front of us.

"All of the have suitcases so their probably going to long-term or dropping off rentals," he reassured me.

The second right lead off onto a temporary, uneven road. We drove along, moving away from the main terminal and around the back of the site, towards the hangars. The road finally smoothed out onto tarmac and we came upon a large concrete multi-storey.

The ticket machine seemed out of order and the barriers were up. Edward quickly pulled into a spot.

The Volvo was the only car in the car park. I handed Edward his cell as we climbed out. He grabbed my bag while doing something with his cell. Snapping it shut, he reached for my hand and led us forward. A sign up ahead told us that the shuttle stop was at the other side of the car park.

We walked quickly from the car towards the exit. The prickling feeling of eyes following me crept up my neck. Edward refused to slacken his hold on my hand, pulling me along beside him swiftly. His eyes darted around us, examining all of the alcoves and crevices in the car park.

"I don't understand why it's so empty…" Edward murmured.

My breathing quickened. I felt like I was watching a bad horror movie where you know the bad guy is about to come out and kill the main character but no matter how much you yell at the screen, the person still opens the door out of curiosity.

The vast space was void of any signs of life. Half filled cement buckets were pushed against the walls and lights flickered above us. The exit sign pointed to a door that wasn't even bolted into place.

We walked out onto the deserted sidewalk. Realisation dawned on us that we were nowhere near the airport.

The area we walked into was bordered by industrial-strengthen steel fencing. A narrow pathway led around the cement pillars supporting the upper levels of the car park, out of sight. Sounds of planes taking off and landing was distant and it was clear we were currently in a trap. I clutched Edward's hand tighter.

"Come on," Edward hissed, pulling me back towards the car park. We spun around only to be greeted by a tall, blonde man.

"Leaving so soon?" a voice snarled behind us.

We slowly turned around. Edward drew me backwards slightly so I was shielded by his body. The action did nothing to hide the two figures in front of us though.

Phil stood in the middle of the dusty area, flanked by a fiery, red-headed woman.

To somebody who glanced at two photos; one of Phil a year ago and one of him now, they would think they were looking at two different people. But for me, having stared at those manic eyes and flinched away from his horrid face, he looked almost identical except for his hair and a minor change in his cheek area, obviously caused by surgery.

He stepped forward, the woman mimicking his pose.

"I would have thought you would at least acknowledge me, Isabella. After all the _good_ times we've spent together."

Edward pulled me sideways, walking away from the man behind us but keeping his distance from Phil.

They countered our movements, until we were slowly moving in a circle.

"But I'm afraid, as they say, that good things do come to an end," he sang softly, reaching into his pocket at a leisurely pace.

The man who was at the car park door had moved beside us in a flash. The woman sprang quickly to our other side. Both stared at us like we were some act, forced to entertain them.

Phil's hand drew out of his pocket, revealing something I had never thought I'd see again.

The setting sun seemed to illuminate the gun as if this has been planned. Images of what had happened on the night of my Renée's death flashed through my mind. The small bullet speeding through the air like a rapid dot. The echo of the shot reverberating off all surfaces in the room.

My sight began to fade and I became unsteady. Reaching my other hand out to hold onto Edward, I stumbled slightly.

Like lightening, the woman gripped my arms and pulled me sharply away from Edward. Without having any support, I fell to the ground. The woman adjusted herself to hold onto me while crouching slightly.

Turning to search for Edward, I seen that he had been caught by the man. Struggling against his grip, he twisted furiously in the hope of breaking free. The man chuckled and tightened his hold.

Phil stalked towards me, smirking as he twirled the gun in his hands like it was a baton.

"No!" Edward roared.

Phil stopped and turned to him, looking curiously at his attack against the man.

"You seem very determined to safe her, don't you?" He asked as he walked a step towards Edward. "Tell me, what would you do for Isabella, here?"

Edward pulled against the man's arm, freeing his chest enough to speak. "Anything," he spat out.

Phil cocked his head to the side. "Anything?… Would you die for her?"

"Don't!" I cried. Edward could not die. A world without Edward was unimaginable.

"I would if it meant saving her," Edward spoke strongly.

"Interesting…" Phil contemplated. He held up his hand to the man holding Edward. The man released Edward, causing him to fall forward.

"Victoria, keep the girl still. James, stand behind me. I've got a feeling you'll like this," Phil shouted, a laugh lilting his voice.

Edward stood up, facing Phil. James walked quickly behind Phil, eager to see what would happen.

My heart was beating at a pace unfamiliar to me. I could feel it pounding furiously against my ribcage but I couldn't hear it. I couldn't hear anything. All of my senses had disappeared in order for me to focus entirely on what was before me.

Phil twitched his hand. The light glinted off the gun. Edward was frozen where he stood but he looked at peace. I was able to understand that face.

It was the face that told me he was happy it was him standing in front of the gun and not me. It was the expression that screamed at me that he was sacrificing himself to keep me alive just that little bit longer.

I silently thanked whatever force was looking over us for the fact that Emmett and Alice had not come with us. The last thing I needed was to worry about two more people.

Victoria tightened her hold around my neck. She was almost hissing in pleasure. James stood about ten feet behind Phil, watching Edward with morbid fascination.

"You may think you're the hero here, boy. But you're not," Phil hissed. "You're just another victim in her life."

Phil jerked his head towards me while Edward tensed further, his eyes narrowing to slits.

"All she has ever done in her life is drag other people back from their potential, ruin people's relationships and get in the way. She's a waste of space, a piece of useless-"

A crackling noise came from behind him. He quickly spun around while keeping the gun trained on Edward. James and Victoria also looked towards the source of the noise.

Everything seemed to happen at once. The police ran forward, Victoria and Phil stayed where they were. James turned quickly to face Charlie and the others.

"Bella!"

Everybody was talking at once, I couldn't place the voice or where it was coming from. Victoria still held onto my neck, threatening to suffocate me. Phil unconsciously backed away from Edward, his eyes trained on the police.

Then everything happened in slow motion.

The police fired two shots, the echoes were almost painfully loud in the quiet area. One shot expertly hit Victoria. I felt her hold on me tighten before slacking. I crawled away from her quickly. The other appeared to have found it's target, James.

He cringed and doubled over, holding his stomach with one hand and raising the gun with the other.

He shot once.

I looked quickly over to where the Charlie and the others were standing. None of them were hit. He must have missed.

I had forgotten that everything had slowed down though. It felt like minutes before I heard it.

"Oh!"

The faint response came from the middle of the police group. They all parted to check who had been hit.

I was screaming before my mind registered the face.

"No!" I shrieked.

Emmett and Charlie looked horrified as they looked at the victim.

The eyes looked down at the blood splattered hands and the pulsing wound. The face raised up once and smiled sadly.

Then Alice Cullen fell forward.

* * *

**A/N: You all thought it was Edward… I'm not that evil.**

**I should be a bit better at getting the next one up but keep in mind it hasn't been written and it's either going to be short and fast or longer and slower. I could probably bang up about 1,000 or more words in a good night or 3,000 in a few days.**

**I got a few reviews recently from three people and wondered, how are they able to find this? Then I decided to sweep off the cobwebs on my FF account and log in. I was actually dumbfounded when I clicked on the stats and traffic pages.**

**That got me thinking that somehow in the past three or four months, this story has rocketed from barely pushing 30 hits a day after a chapter post, to hitting up to 100 even without a chapter in a while. I was just wondering how some of you came across this story or if somebody recommended it to you, tell me the site etc so I can go over and thank them!**


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